060. - Pia Baroncini

All right, this episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Stateside with Kai and Carter, a new podcast from The Guardian. And they are using this podcast to slow down the news and wrestle with the questions that we all have about what's happening in the world. And they do it three times a week. Jason, does that sound familiar to you? We don't really talk about, you know, a lot of international global news items and climates and cultures and sports and things like that. We do talk about fashion and wellness, but for everything else, Kai and Carter are a great place. All right, so who couldn't use more news? Listen wherever you get your podcast. or watch on YouTube. Want to make a podcast? Spotify's got a platform that lets you make one super easily, then distribute it everywhere, and even earn money. We like that. All in one place for totally free. It's called Spotify for Podcasters. And here's how it works. Spotify for podcasters lets you record and edit podcasts right from your cellular telephone or your computer. So no matter what your setup is like, you can start creating today. Then you can distribute your podcast to Spotify and everywhere else, those other places that podcasts are heard. Video podcasts are also available on Spotify. And when you want to take conversations with your fans to the next level, Q&As and polls are the best way to get them talking. With Spotify for podcasters, you can earn money in a variety of ways, including ads and... and podcast subscriptions. And best of all, it's totally free. Zero catch. We've been using it ever since we started How Long Gone. And ever since I discovered Spotify for Podcasters, I feel like having the option of turning off the Q&As and the polls on the user dashboard has really helped boost my creativity and take it to another level. I highly recommend giving it a try. Download the Spotify for Podcasters app or go to www.spotify.com slash podcasters to get started.

Hello, Chris. What's up, loser? How are you? Hey, I am good, man. We both have some busy days the last couple days. A lot of calls and meetings and things like that, huh? It's wearing me out. This part-time podcaster shit is really just adding fuel to the flames. Are you going to be able to still deliver the content, though? Oh, bitch, come on now. What do you mean? Am I going to still be able to deliver the content? I'm built for the shit, TJ. Yeah, you're a content factory. You're a farm. All you do is shit it out. It honestly, it takes so little effort, it's scary. Don't say that. Because, you know, some people, they like to... To have it come naturally and be proud of that versus those who have to grind to get to where they are. You are here with a low level of grind is what you're saying. Jason, I'm 37 years old. I've been grinding since I was 18. So like, you know, I'm not new to this. I'm true to this. What were you doing before you were 18? Not grinding. I wouldn't say grinding. I mean, trying to grind on like a curb, but beyond that, beyond that, not much. That's true. Yesterday we had a seafood fiesta. I made Jason, because of his height, he was able to actually form a seafood tower with his limbs. I didn't get any pictures because he didn't look great. It wasn't flattering really, but he was really able to put me in that zone. I felt like I was a Balthazar. A lot of people, they put emphasis on the Seafood Tower of maybe what is inside of and involved in the tower. But for me, it's just how many inches can we go. Exactly. What's the wingspan on your tower? You know what I mean? That's really what we're going for here. We did. We went to, I guess, a Glendale landmark. Glendale landmark.

I had never visited before, but I know from being friends with you, Fish King. The Fish King. The local monger slash restaurant, correct? That is correct. If you've ever heard of Santa Monica seafood on the west side of LA, it's very much the east side version of that. Just one of those classic neighborhood spots where the mongers... Every monger knows your name. It's a local neighborhood institution. It's not cheap, but it's worth it. I will say that Jason's name did ring bells when we walked through the door. And that's one of the only... Outside of a food establishment, there are not many opportunities where that happens, where I am greeted with welcoming arms, or at least... Maybe they're humoring me, perhaps. Well, no. I think it's all based on your disarming height. And once they see you, they can't forget you. You know what I mean? It's not based on my years of being in the food trenches, earning my stripes. No. I mean, I think cutting the line at LAX on Sunday nights because your height is a little cooler than going to... Get in here, Stretch. Than getting into Fish King and then getting no discount on your purchase. You know what I mean? I don't know what's cooler. I would refuse a discount because that's a support local business. Yeah, sure you would. But yeah, we picked up hella shrimp because CB, I was just craving a shrimp cocktail. Yeah, I learned that Chris's love for shrimp cocktails is pretty strong. That is your glizzy of the moment right now. Yes, hot dogs are disgusting and have always been, even any variety, from vegan to real to jumbo to Chicago. It's all gross. Could you say that shrimp is the glizzy of the sea? Damn, interesting thought. Let me get back to you on that. I don't know if I'm willing to go that far at this juncture. Okay, you were sharing with me some images of the way that people are incorporating glizzies into their everyday life.

A full glizzy in the bun with all the toppings and condiments that had then been dunked into a milkshake situation from, was it like a Sonic or something like that? No, that was a classic DQ blizz. Yeah, that was from, you know Julian Berman, the photographer. He actually, he posted that. I don't think it was his image, but it was a shocking and also eye-opening image. I usually don't participate in these types of performative food trends. You're above that. I am above that, but it really got me thinking of ways that I can make it my own and creatively incorporate them into my food journey. I think I found one. Yeah, I was going to ask. You were in the Them Jeans test kitchen. What have we come up with? Well, I'm going to try it out tonight. But my angle for the glizz, well, I mean, I guess we should let people know. Glizzy, if you don't know, is just a slang for hot dogs, I guess. And I don't really know why or how that happened. But it did. Do you know the story behind it, Chris? No, I don't, Jason, because I don't care. But continue. I mean, I guess I don't care enough either. But everyone wants to show off the glizzy in a very performative act. And I'm going to zig instead of zagging and have it be a little bit more of a subtle inclusion. I'm going to hide the glizzy instead of showcase it. Tonight, I'm going to make some enchiladas, some shrimp enchiladas with my leftover shrimps. You're going to make the glizzy disappear, is what you're saying? That's exactly what I'm saying. So I'm going to make a tray of enchiladas. Let's say there's eight enchiladas total. And the fifth one will not be filled with a delicious blend of shrimp and cheeses.

it will just have a plain hot dog inside of it. And you won't know which one it is until you bite into that bad Oscar. Oh, interesting. Oh, so it's going to be a little surprise. So, you know, like in New Orleans, they have the king cake where... I'm not familiar with this. I hate that place. Continue. In New Orleans, they have... Stop doing that. In New Orleans. You're talking about down in New Orleans? Well, they have... They have a thing called a king cake where there's a national holiday or some type of regional holiday where maybe it's New Year's or something. I don't know what it is. But they make this special cake that is a multicolored cake dyed with all these colors. It's one of the ugliest looking things I've ever seen. And then you pass it around and everyone eats a slice. And then someone's slice will have this plastic baby. It's like a little toy. Oh, okay. I didn't know what it was called. I have seen this before. Right. So it's sort of my version of that. Whoever finds the glizzy in my enchiladas will then receive good luck and fortune for the next year to come, perhaps. Is a shrimp enchilada good, though? Yeah, it is good. A shrimp enchilada is not very uncommon at all. You can find it on any menu where you can find an enchilada. Okay, so you're not really doing anything similar to a glizzy at all. You're just hiding shrimp in an enchilada and not telling whoever's going to eat it? No, I'm making eight shrimp enchiladas that are regular enchiladas, delicious and normal, but one of those will not be filled with shrimp at all. They will be filled with just one. kind of uncooked hot dog oh oh okay now i'm in and you don't and you don't know which enchilada out of that eight i see is the one containing a special price yes you're playing glizzy roulette if you will glizzy roulette is exactly what i'm doing and then you know now i'm in okay i understand now i'm sorry i was getting a little confused i was like has jason smoked too much weed today because this isn't that cool but now it's cool

Don't doubt me. I'm glad that I'm validated with my idea as well. Thank you. Your name is good here. Yeah, I just wanted to get that out of the way before we talk to our guest because I don't know if anyone is going to want to talk about hot dogs that much with us. Well, Jason, I don't want to talk about hot dogs either, but you brought it up, so I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I'm trapped on my own fucking show. I'm in jail and TJ wants to talk about hot dogs. No place I'd rather be. I mean, dead ass same. I mean, I'm about to go to that. I'm about to go play tennis in a country club, so that's where I'd rather be. Do you have your outfit worked out yet? What's going on? I mean, unfortunately, Jason, because of my vagrant lifestyle, I don't have my tennis whites with me, so I need to cop a set, actually, but that would be appropriate. Can't you task rabbit a Uniqlo polo or something? Unfortunately, Jason, I don't think it works like that in your town. In New York, yeah, I could get everything to me in 30 minutes, but in this shithole, it's going to take two hours in a Tesla. But I have my regular tennis gear ready to go. I'm ready to go. But I think going from these trash Glendale public courts to a proper home for someone of my stature, even though... The stature of my play isn't as good as the stature of my person. I will feel very at home in a manicured country club environment and therefore may relax me into actually playing better. Right, right. Pro setting, pro. Yeah, well, it's also with a friend who I've never played with before. Usually I rise to the occasion when it's feeling a little new. Damn. I would ask what drives you and what moves you, but you just told me. Yeah. Well, part of the reason I don't use drugs anymore and part of the reason that I try to be good at sports is embarrassment. So I just don't want to embarrass myself. You know what I mean? That's really what it's about. I don't think you'll embarrass yourself, but I do think the chances of you losing are decently high, right? Bitch, I don't know.

Why would you say that to me? Just to hear what level of high-pitched your voice would go up to. And it looks like we got about a seven. If I'm a boxer, you should be holding up a bucket for me to spit in. And instead, you're punching me. That ain't how this is supposed to work, bro. Unfortunately, in this relationship, I have to do both. Successfully punch you into defeat. And then, you know, help you lick those wounds afterwards. Yes, yes. And I appreciate and hate it all at the same time, the same amount. Oh, God. Well, today's guest is Pia Barroncini. Barroncini, buongiorno! You know, enjoy that Italian accent while we still can, Chris. Oh, you think I can keep the Italian? I'm going to say buongiorno five times minimum in the next hour. You, sir, are problematico. That's my Zac Efron impression. All right, you're in trouble. So Pia Barroncini, she is a person that I've known for a while. I actually produced a podcast for her last year, so we became pod pals from that. So if you're listening to this show for the first time because you listen to her podcast, then hello and welcome back. Welcome home. I'm very interested to see how – I can't wait to talk to Pia about what it's like to work with you and how difficult it is. I think it's going to be her and I commiserating together for an hour while you sit there and try to say words in Italian. Have I made this podcasting journey difficult for you, Chris? No, but it could always be better, Jason. You know what I mean? That's life in general, though. Yeah, I know what you mean. That's fine, and that's fair. Yeah, so we will get into that. And I think that one of the biggest things that I bonded over with her was the obsession and fascination with diet and biohacking and fitness and fasting and supplements and nutrients and all those things that you're also interested in as well. I can't wait. Well, also, we should mention that Pia owns a very successful clothing line called LPA. That is true.

So we can talk about Moon Juice Powder, but she's also a true businesswoman. Yeah, she's a garment baroness. I want to be a garment baroness. All right, well, let's call the atelier and see if she's around. Okay, later, mate. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Squarespace. Obviously, Jason, you and I spend a lot of time on the World Wide Web, so do all our peers, our listeners, our friends, our colleagues, maybe even your parents if they're freaky. And if you're doing anything in the world, writing, taking pictures. I do topless boxing. You need a website. Exactly, a website that works, that does what it's supposed to do, that allows you to be creative but also business-minded. Jason, there's one place to go for that, Squarespace. Yeah, Chris, I'm over here. I'm modifying calculators and putting Claude inside of them so you could cheat at school. And I just want a place where I could have everything all in one place. I can have the SEO tools so those future graduates can find me. And I'm able to accept, quote unquote, donations for my services that might be gray area. You know what I mean? And then email campaigns. Hey, I got a new 2.3 version upgrade. Boom, boom, boom. Get the analytics going. Raise some money. Show your investor all of your cool analytics of what's going on. They're going to want to get in early. And we can use Blueprint AI to make your website look as professional as your competition, if not more. So head to squarespace.com slash howlong for a free trial. When you're ready to launch, use offer code howlong to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by a new podcast from The Guardian stateside with Kai and Carter. This is covering a lot of our bases, Jason. It's trying to slow down. the news and wrestle with the questions we all have about what's happening in the world and i know you particularly have quite a lot of questions a lot of questions but how often because we do this podcast three times a week and that's a sweet spot how many times do they do three times a week and i i have a feeling just based on the platform and these talking points that they're maybe going to be covering different stuff than we do that's just a guess the guardian is not some billionaire owned

They're not afraid to say what they want to say, brother. Yeah, Rupert ain't sniffing around in what journalists Kai Wright and Carter Sherman are up to over there at Stateside. But yeah, listen wherever you get your podcasts. You can watch it on YouTube. It's three times a week. And who couldn't use more news? You know, especially when it's not, you know, from here, let's say. Give it a listen. Give it a listen. All right, this episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Quince. Jason, the temps are warming up. It's getting hot out there. Summer always changes how I get dressed. I need pieces that feel lighter, more breathable, and they're just easy, but still put together. I don't want to look like a slob. That's why I keep coming back to Quince. They focus on high-quality essentials that feel and look amazing. Breathable linen and soft organic cottons. Well-made basics, but without the luxury markups. That rare balance where everything feels elevated. but still effortless. Yeah, Chris, linen season is here. I wore a linen blazer to dinner a few nights ago in the warm California sun. But you know, you got that Italy trip coming up this summer and quality European linen pants and shirts. Upgrade that look starting at just $34. You know, if you get a nice linen suit, a little t-shirt underneath it, some chill shoes, you're looking good, but you're staying cool. The inside of your special areas are nice and dry as you turn up with your besties. So elevate that summer wardrobe. Go to quince.com slash how long for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns, even on a nice holiday now available in Canada. That is Q-U-I-N-C-E dot com slash how long. That'll get you free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince punto com slash how long. Property Brothers are back here on the show. What's up? I'm Property Jason. I'm Property Jason. Pia, are you? So look at you. You're stationary. You're on a laptop. I'm turning off my notifications.

Oh, wow. You're a person who keeps their noties on? I'm a pooter. Yeah. What? You're a what? I call my computer my pooter. Okay. That's not what I was saying. I'm saying. Jason, why can't I see you? Because this is just an audio based podcast only. I can turn my camera on. Yeah, turn it on because I know it's just better to see faces. The fact that we have been in the same city for a month and have chosen not to do this together says a lot, I think. Yeah. Oh, that's crazy. Pia, your podcast that you do right now, is that all over the phone or do you ever do IRL interviews? It's all over Zoom. All Zoom. Do you find that the connection just isn't hitting the same via comp? Excuse me, excuse me, via pooter? My pooter. No, I feel like it's fine. See, I think it's fine too. People are like driving from one side of LA to another side of LA, like going into a building they've never been in before and then like sit down and then it's like, it's hot in the room and you're like focusing on the mic being close to your face. Like, I think it's more comfortable. what kind of good stuff did you offer your guests in real, in real life? Like, could I get a latte or like a Fiji or like, what did you, what did you have before zoom? At dear media, it's like fancy stuff. It's like, they get whatever they want. There's like mountain Valley water, just like glass bottles. And now we're, now we're fucking talking. So, so if I'm a guest, let's just say I'm a guest. I know I wouldn't be, but let's just say I'm a guest. Do I, do I get to sit in the building? Does my agent get to send over my requests like a classic writer? Like a writer? Yeah. No, okay. Well, you said they had everything, so I just wanted to see if I could. No, it's not like, no, because no one's that big of an asshole. I love that I'm in Jason's room. I feel like we know each other so well, and now I know you on a more intimate level. Like, now I know that you can use a gray towel.

Which, P, I don't know about you, but that's kind of gross. I'm white Lennon's old. Very college. Very college. Oh, my God. Which is really funny because he didn't go to college. I don't know where he picked up this bad behavior. I don't know where he learned this bad behavior. He's carrying his room into a dorm room. It does look a little dormy in there from this angle. This is not my room. This is a guest slash office area. It's just the quietest part. Don't start on homeowner renovation talk. That towel is hanging in here because it was one that I was laying down and using when I was working out in the backyard because the heat is so hot on the pads that it hurts to lay on it. It is a utility towel. I work my body so much that The sweat in a white linen adulting towel might become problematic. I bet, Pia, I bet you've got some nice-ass towels, don't you? The towels that I use for my bathroom right now are from HomeGoods. And all the matching sets together took my husband and I like 45 fucking minutes to find like two of each. I'm honestly stunned. I thought you would have gone to like fourseasons.com and just bought whatever they had there. I don't know what money you think I make, but it's not fourseasons.com level. No. But thank you for assuming that I have no. It's not about money. I understand how the clothing business works. It's about taste and caring about yourself and prioritizing what's important. And that's why we're grateful that HomeGoods exists because it has all of those marks and it's available for our price point. Can you guys explain to me what HomeGoods is? I've never been there. HomeGoods is where every one of my girlfriends ever is addicted to shopping to because of their mom getting them addicted to shopping there. It goes one of two ways. You walk in and you're unbelievably blown away by the amount of stuff that you can get at such affordable prices or you have an existential crisis about how much shit is in the world and have a mouth down.

Oh, like there are times where I go in there. I'm like, there's, if this is just one store and there's multiple locations and there's multiple companies like this, like we're going to hell in handbasket. Like the amount of crap. What is it? But is it like a Marshall's? Yes. But for home stuff. So it's like, is this a Cali exclusive? It might be, but there's like a section of like kitchen stuff, plates. equipment and then there's like a bunch of like wine glasses knives ottomans towels then there's a whole section of young couples buying like live laugh love prints yeah there's live laugh don't do not talk about my mom like that she's not fucking young first of all and then the back of it is all food that is shelf stable but it shouldn't be Like popcorn buckets with three flavors? Well, that stuff, but then it's just like meats and cheeses that have been sitting on the shelf since 2014. You know what I mean? There's not meat and cheeses. Yeah, yeah. They'll have like a charcuterie of the world sampler pack, and it'll be... Bro, that's crazy! Well, they make... You know, when you get like the Preppage Farm gift bag, and they'll have like the cheese spread that, you know, doesn't need to be refrigerated. home goods and brings back unnecessary objects constantly i didn't know i mean i see home goods on the timeline actually relatively often really it's great and yeah and i i'm always i just didn't really i assumed it was like a marshall's tj maxx adjacent business but i but i wasn't clear it's a little more continental and global chris it focuses on not the american market but the world market Oh, okay. Thank you for telling me that. I think there's a place that's actually called World Market. Yeah, World Market is where white people go to feel like they... have some culture. Okay, so now we're going to talk about my mom. That is actually this podcast. Yeah, that is this podcast. Thank you. That's our new tagline. That's every podcast. Sorry. Where white people go to talk to feel like they have culture is the new tagline for how long gone. It's crazy. It's like a margarita section and like an Asian section and Indian section. World market's wild. That sounds like Jason's Raya profile.

I'm sorry. We can cut that. Go ahead and clap, Jason. Just clap. Leave it in. I've never had Raya, but my dating history is publicly known to somewhat sure. It is multicultural. It's not a shot. It's just a truism that I saw expose itself during the conversation. And your Raya profile is like a bag of Wonder Bread. And then each slice is covered in a nice mayonnaise. Is mayonnaise blonde hair? Because that's fine. The French's is too spicy. The French's is too spicy. I have a sensitive palate. You know I have to be careful. When Chris travels internationally, he's talking about Canada only. I just want to get away. And, you know, I just really need to experience something like different, you know, it's an alternate universe where everything is the same, but it's like a little wrong. It's a little wrong, a little wrong. That's true. I mean, I kind of feel, yeah, I, that's the best way to describe it. I think, cause it's pretty nice and you feel comfortable there, but then there's stuff that just feels a little wrong. Everyone's talking a little weird. Yeah. Yeah. No, no, no. Everything's just, like, a little weird. That's honestly, though, that's kind of how I feel about California sometimes when I'm here. Why? Whatever. Because you guys are fucking freaks, man. There's just some shit about California that you, like, have to really figure out, you know? Like what? Oh, just, like... I mean, I think it really comes down to, like, the car culture stuff. And not being, like, so used to that and how that's, like, a part of everything. Well, you are from Atlanta. That's a big car culture, isn't it? I would agree, but I've been disconnected from that for a very long time now. Atlanta is very spread out. You've got to drive everywhere. But I understand moving away when you're young and then living somewhere else. And then in your adult life, you're acclimated to, like, walking. Yes, yeah. You know, you lived in New York. You know what it's like to walk. You know how it is to strap on those Manolos and stumble on the cobblestone?

I've seen your ass in the meatpacking district. You can't front on us. Well, look, who amongst us hasn't fallen in the meatpacking district? You know what I mean? That's true. Honestly, Manolo's are not. I skipped over the whole meatpacking thing because I moved to New York and moved to the Lower East Side in 2005 and hung out exclusively at the Max Fish. So would you classify yourself as a... reformed skater dater or did you just like the bar do i clap when it gets cut yeah if there's a reason why we had to cut then yeah we would clap but so far clap detector reads negative but max fish is max fish is a cultural institution that i would put beyond skateboarding yeah chris were you were you there Trying to suck some dick at Max Fish in 05, 06? 05, 06, no. 07, 08, yes. 07, 08, you had the bundle ready to go. Ready to do a key bump in the bathroom. And you were probably there, but I was more of a lit guy. You know what I mean? Lit the bar, not lit the lifestyle. My roommate was the bartender there. I used to be like, I'm not going out tonight. And at like 2 in the morning, we'd be like, I'll just go for one drink. Do you honestly, though, is it? Isn't it actually insane that you wouldn't leave the house till midnight? When you really think about that, I think about it all the time. It's insane. I don't like my, like my Paul, my friend Polly called me the other day and he was like, we're at what's your face. Like, you know, we have like a crew of people who've been quarantining. So like their crew and then I have my crew in Pasadena and they were like, come to whatever, whoever's house. And I was like, it's 7.30. Look, guys, the sun's going to set in an hour and a half. I need to be inside. He's like, I used to meet up with you at 11.30 to pre-drink before we would go out. And then I was like, but I've been drinking since 4.30 now. So at 7.30 to me, my new clock is drunk by 9 and then in sleep.

In bed asleep by 10. Are you going for like a Real Housewives of Pasadena pilot episode situation? Or do you have that network? I think I should. I mean, I think I would be doing myself a disservice by not trying to market what's happening over here because I'm like very reformed. But the alcoholism is still all there. It's just in different forms. You just bumped it up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So what kind of hard cider are you drinking? What kind of twisted kombucha are you sucking down over there in the hills? Does moon juice make something alcoholic? My cute mom friend who is around the corner, she drinks June sign. She's like, do you want a hard kombucha? The hard kombucha section at Whole Foods is growing every time I visit there. Hard kombucha is good for a hangover. Good for a hangover. Jason, I've seen you drink a hard kombucha and it honestly was unsettling. Look, I like alcohol. I like kombucha. Nobody needs that many probiotics. You got to keep that microbiome settled, dude. You can't like... Yeah, Pia, I need you to give me... We can overdose on micro... Yeah, it's not good. You can have too much good bacteria and then you have like... You fuck up all your stuff. It's like when I got mercury poisoning from Nobu, Jason. It's like a similar... It's like a similar thing. No more Nobu. No more Nobu. I just couldn't stop, dude. It was too good. And then, you know, they caught up with me. Nobu is so expensive. Nobu doesn't ever need to be visited. Yes, I disagree. I've been there twice in my life. Nobu's hot fire. I went to the one in Newport recently, or not recently, like a year ago, because there was nowhere. The restaurant next door was like a two-hour wait, and I was like, fuck, we have nowhere else to eat. What's your backup school? I guess we'll go Nobu. Yeah, back at school, it was like Harvard. And so we went to Nobu and ordered. I was like, I'm just going to get some. In my head, I was like, don't order a lot. It's going to be really expensive. So I had two drinks and some snacks. I want to keep it sub $500. It was like $250. So I was like, fuck this. Nobu is, guys, Nobu is an institution for a reason. And I think the atmosphere that it's created and its legendary status from television shows like Sex and the City makes it more than food.

No boot is more than food, but all the stuff that is more than food is not good. Alex and I went there in New York to the original location, and it did cost $200, and no one even drank. So, I mean, I don't know. When you drink booze, man, and you're at least doing like a two-cocktailer, I mean, just with alcohol, you're at $70 right there. More than that. I am, though. Pia, what do you think? Do you think Nobu Malibu is letting the paparazzi know that the celebrities are there so that they get the photos so that then regular people like me know that they're open for business and I will go patronize? Or do you think the celebrities are calling? There's certain places where the paparazzi just camp out. Because between Soho House and Nobu... It's a cesspool of celebrities. Well, which, all right, so in a battle royale. I miss Soho House. You had to pick, Pia. Are you going Soho House, West Hollywood, or Nobu Malibu? I'm only a member of Malibu because otherwise, how do you go to the beach? Damn. To the beach in Malibu is impossible. You can't park anywhere. It's true. Do you remember, Jason, do you remember at the beginning of this podcast where she was like, what kind of money do you think I'm making? And now she just told us that she's not expensive. It's just very exclusive. It's very exclusive. It's very hard to get the invite. Super not expensive. And then like. If you fucking work it right, the buffet is 40 bucks. And so you just stay, you just have your like brunch and maybe like a snack and then dinner before you leave. All inclusive of the 40 bucks. Wow. Is that an exclusive Soho House Malibu hack? This is, yeah, we're really into biohacking and all types of food science stuff. That's actually, that's actually good advice. And as a person who has never been a member of Soho House, because it's a little too on the nose for me, I think that the, the, the,

brunch thing, like the whole spread, is very impressive, except I just can't eat that much. I'm not going to eat carbs and stuff, so I feel like I'm not getting my money's worth. You're a quality, not quantity guy. You don't eat carbs? I really try not to. We're trying to be wispy. I'm a one-man person bringing back heroin chic. You can go there on a Sunday and just eat on a Sunday. Yeah, Chris, he derives a lot of pleasure from eating, but he really restricts the amount going in because he really cares about how it's going to affect the way his body feels and the way he can perform the next day. I eat a lot. I eat a lot. I eat a lot, too. Well, Jason, you're a freak, and Pia is Italian, correct? So that's like in your blood, I think. Yeah, but I'm getting really thick. I can't even put on my fat jeans right now. Do you think that's quarantine or do you think that's just you love rice balls? A rice ball would make my stomach so sick. I can't eat a rice ball. I have weird food stuff, but beginning of quarantine, I was like, my husband works from home or he was before he started this new job. So he kept his same schedule. Like there wasn't like a lot of adjustments. Like he would wake up, take a shower, make his like breakfast, go sit downstairs, sit in his office. key pickle routine and i followed suit and so we were like working out and like i was like fuck like i'm getting more fit because i'm doing workouts and then going on long walks every day please please hold hold where what kind of workouts walk us through the workouts are we doing strength training well now my world is all turned upside down because i interviewed this woman named elissa vitti for my podcast which came out yesterday and i've been doing everything wrong Shit. I hope I haven't been doing everything wrong. No, because you men only have one rhythm. You have your circadian rhythm. Women have two. We have like our infradian rhythm. So basically like the four weeks of my 28 day cycle of the month, I'm supposed to be exercising and eating like a little bit differently. So I've never been able to lose weight. And I've only gone, you know, all my doctors, like my fucking fancy doctors.

I've always said intermittent fast and like do a HIIT workout on an empty stomach or, you know, I do like a lot of Peloton. I was doing lots of like bar classes at hot yoga, like really intense stuff. Are you a disciple? Are you a disciple of my queen, Shannon? Shannon, I love so much, but I feel really insecure in those classes. Shannon is like. It's hot Pilates and I went once and the only other, I go, actually I try to go a lot. And at one time though, the only other man in the class was Puff Daddy. How do you not get boners the whole time? It's like the hottest girls in LA dripping sweat. I mean, it's like, it's a little, it's a little corny. Like the whole, it's like a gym shark a little bit is the vibe on the chicks. But there's always a chance of like a Haley Bieber coming in late. It keeps me driven. keeps me, keeps me sweating on the mat anyway. So you're, you're saying that I was doing all of that. So intermittent fasting is bad for you. Yeah. Now that I'm having all these problems getting pregnant, I'm like, what's wrong with me? And it's like, I've just been doing stuff wrong because all the studies on diets and exercise in the U S and it's not, and even the way she was saying it, it's not like this is a patriarch. It's just, it's all done on men. So. like all of it is done on men. Like it's all, you can just Google it. All the research is there. It's all published obviously. So, um, now like this week, um, is my menstrual week. If you would like to know. So you're the first person that's announced that they're menstruating on this podcast. Congratulations. Thank you. So I did like, instead of, instead of waking up and being tired and being like, Oh, my lazy ass needs to go on a walk or like I got to put my ass on. It's like I now I'm like my body's tired. So I like did a yin yoga this morning and I'm going on like a long walk this afternoon. I'm being much more gentle with the approach instead of being like I've been training like a football player since I got fat when I was 12. So I've just been doing it wrong. Damn, same. But I guess because I'm a man, it's OK.

Yeah, and, like, my husband will lose weight in, like, four seconds doing anything. Like, we both did Prolon. I've done Prolon, like, eight times. What is that? That sounds like a fertilizer. Yeah. It's a fast-mimicking diet by Dr. Walter Longo at USC. It's five days of, like, powdered soups and snacks where you're in autophagy for five days. It's an amazing way to, like, clean out the cells in your body. It's wonderful. So is this something I should do, like, before my Netflix premiere red carpet? Yeah. You should do this as a man. You should do this like once a quarter to like clear out like bad cells in your body. But I did that and lost like a pound and Davide lost 50. I mean, so you're saying a problem with a lot of the information that we are given is that it's tested on men, therefore only applicable to men. And women are getting the same information. Yeah, and like women have so many other hormones and they change on a weekly basis. So we've just been. Like, our body needs, like, some weeks it needs more sleep. Some weeks it needs more calories. Some weeks you can do less calories and hit workouts. Like, next week I'm going to be pumped full of energy. I've just been, like, stopped drinking coffee. What is wrong with you? I'm trying to get fucking pregnant. This shit sucks. You can't do coffee when you're trying to get pregnant? Caffeine can fucking spark infertility. Wow, I didn't know that. Actually, I'm fine. I just like the ritual. Sure. I mean, I know that there's so many things that can impede pregnancy, but I feel like it's something, I'm sure you found out it's like something new every day. Yeah, it's a fucking shit show. This whole process is a goddamn annoying shit show. On top of being like, I'm already living, we need to have sex now. My husband being like, that's not how it works. And I'm like, yeah, yes. Because it's like, we have like four hours. Well, how many specialists are you working with? Not, I went to, I... I'm not. I don't like that. My gynecologist had a horrible experience with a miscarriage with him. He was so dismissive and rude. And then I went to another doctor who just told me I'm old and need IVF. And that was disheartening. So now I'm just like starting this journey. I'm seeing.

Someone who is apparently is really good at getting women pregnant and it's like $100. He's like a chiropractor. I'm seeing him and then I'm going to go back to another like doctor, doctor. But in the meantime, I'm just like trying to cycle sync and taking, you know, all the necessary vitamins and stuff. But it's scary. I'm sorry. Yeah, I mean, I'm sure. It's like so common and often and all the time. And it's very odd as a woman being like. you can have like have kids later like travel like sleep with tons of people like become a fucking ceo you're a boss you don't need to worry about it and then it's like cool and then you like wait and then your doctor's like oh yeah you're old you like missed your window i'm like i'm not old i'm 33 so i'll be very interested to see like what i learned from this process and how i translate that to my daughters which probably would be like getting the necessary you know, tests done at younger ages, like in your twenties and thirties. And if you see like your reserve getting low, like, you know, getting your eggs frozen, just being proactive about it. This shit sucks. Well, also, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Or make a baby. Well, does it, but this is also can get like cost prohibitive. I imagine. Dude. It's a joke. Some people have fertility like next time. This should also be mandatory. Every fucking company should have fertility insurance. If you just have fertility insurance, most of it's covered. Oh, I didn't know that was even a thing. So explain that to us, please. I'm, I don't have it. So like my husband just signed with a new company and I'm like getting on the call with the HR woman today to be like, do you guys have, because I'm sure it, cause it's an Italian company. They would, cause they fucking think about that shit. So it's, it's basically just an insurance policy that is, that goes along with the regular coverage that will cover fertility. Yeah. Like if I, if I go to the doctor, if I go to an IVF doctor, they do the tests. I have like low AMH, low FSH. Like they're like. It'll be like nearly impossible for you to like, if you get pregnant, fine. But if your egg quality is really bad, that's why a lot of women miscarriage is like the quality of the egg is not there. So you really want to do whatever you can with like acupuncture and supplements to get your egg quality high. So you stay pregnant because your body's really smart. If it has something in it that it thinks has a chromosomal disorder, it passes it for you. It's really beautiful the way that your body knows.

you know, it's like, okay, we can't do any of that. Uh, and IVF is the only option that it's my understanding that insurance can cover, um, a good amount of those treatments. Cause like just the shots for the egg retrieval, like the hormone shots that you give yourself are between three and $6,000 and no insurance covers that. But like they'll cover the retrieval or they'll cover like the blood, all the other things. It's a fucking nightmare. Damn. That's a plain Jane. That's damn. I thought. I could get a vintage Mercedes for a couple shots. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Fuck, man. And Davide's sperm is, like, top-notch, like, a lot of quiver. We got that tested right away, and he was like, no! And I was like, okay, you can get someone else pregnant in the meantime if it makes you feel better. Okay, fine. If you must, I guess go use it. How much has this pregnancy journey been affecting your life negatively? Are you doing okay? A lot. It's like, I went through, thank you for asking. Yeah. The process of like having the miscarriage, talking to a doctor, feeling like my body wasn't working. And then being confused and feeling lost and like no one, I hate, like there was. systems in place for women in this position, which I'm working on. I'm actually interviewing the woman who founded Modern Fertility later today. I'm now seeing the light and I'm seeing that a lot of women have come up with really good solutions, but not a lot of people know about it. But it put me into like a deep where I would be like at my friend's house drinking and I'd be like, everything's fine. And then like, you know, they both have two kids and like on my third glass of wine, I'd be like. So you just like own this house and you have to have two kids. And I had to send so many like, sorry for crying last night texts. That is a text that I have never sent. Sorry I ruined your rummy cubes with my tears. I mean, is it hard?

Is it hard to think about anything else? I feel like it'd be very easy to fixate on because there's so much information to digest. So my work now is like what most of our work should be anyways, just focusing on living every day in a way that's not going to hurt me mentally. So I wake up, I wake up happy, I'm thoughtful. I do things that nourish my body. I go on walks if I feel like. having a bad girl snack i have it i'm not like really i'm not like i can't do that like i'm just like living my life and um you know if you're happy and relaxed a lot of the time they say then like that's when it happens so i'm like i'm just gonna give myself the next six months also like now i'm at the point where i'm like it's really nice not having a kid like when i'm with my like people you can't just do what you fucking want when you have a kid like it sucks like all my friends have kids and i'm seeing it and us being able to just like get in the car and go on a road trip or like He left for a month for work. It's fine. If he left me alone for a month here with a kid, I would be like, are you kidding me? I experienced that yesterday. I was riding past the DMV and it was like 95 degrees outside, 100 people in line wrapped around the building. And there was just a woman there with her baby stroller. And I was like, that's the worst situation you could be in, waiting hours in the sun at the DMV and then add a kid to it. And I'm sticking with a puppy, I guess. I'm being thankful for everything I have in this moment and when this baby wants to come and great. And hopefully it's sooner than later, but I'm fine with like, we're all, we're all gunning for it. We're putting it out into the universe that you'll have this Bambini. I think it'll be a boy. I feel it. Do you have a name picked up? Oh yeah. All of them. Is it like some Italian? It's like some Italian shit. Yeah. It's like, it sounds like it's just like a sound. It's like so long sound, but it's just my, it's like my dad, like, you know, one of my dad's names, my grandpa's name, Sabade's mom's name. And then.

So I'm like little, I mean, he was like, we should name him Ulysses. And I was like, what? Ulysses. That's a powerful name. Or he really wanted, he really wanted, he liked Beatrice, but in Italian it's Beatrice. And I was like, but here it's Beatrice. And he's like, well, you say Beatrice. You tell everybody it's Beatrice. Both of you guys have good points. Correcting someone. No, that's not. Also, I think that, that parents sometimes forget that. the child is going to be dealing with this name for their entire life. And you need to be respectful. That's the only thing I think of is like when you start kindergarten and they like call off the list, like, is it cool? That's why, that's why I try to only socialize with people that have names that are from the Bible. It makes it, it makes it much easier for me. You're a white supremacist. No. Hey, hey, no. I know, I know Jason's that aren't Jason. We always just end up there, don't we? What have you been podcasting about lately? Aside from your fertility journey. I mean, it is kind of cool that you bring that much of your life into your show every week and people can kind of chronologically follow along. I literally cried the whole time. I had so many realizations throughout that podcast that were so body boy. So those are why it's nice to kind of have like blind conversations with people. I didn't pre-interview her, but we, I mean, every week is different. Like I would be crying if, if I had been intermittent fasting for a year and somebody told me I shouldn't have been doing that. I've been like in like I teen for fucking or I effing for fucking two and a half years. I've been like, like, like eating breakfast now is so hard for me. Well, it's. I mean, I'm shocked. I'm so not used to eating breakfast. I just recently started eating breakfast as well, and it feels a little dirty, feels a little wrong. But I know maybe in the long run it'll be good for me. Who knows? I want to know where you get all these recipes that you're like, the shit that you're cooking at home is so professional, Jason. It's crazy. It tastes just okay in my experience, but it looks really good on Instagram.

It's all just coming up top right here, you know? Coming off that beautiful thick head of hair? Yeah, this wonderful hairlined dome is where it all comes from. It's crazy. You have a lot of ingredients in your house. I do have a lot of ingredients and a lot of useless equipment as well. Saying to someone you have a lot of ingredients in your house is a very cool, specific way to compliment them. It's awesome because you're making so many dishes that are from so many different fucking cultures that you have. Not just Asia, Chris. Not just Asia. I'm just like, wow, you have that. I'm just thinking about your spice cabinet. It must just look like the fucking spice aisle at Whole Foods. I'm actually not a massive spice guy. We know. We know, white boy. Bitch, I'm spicier than you. I get it done with as few spices as possible. I don't need... I never have something in my spice cabinet that is not... If you're through a lot of meats, I feel like you're marinating. I do a decent amount of marinating, sure. I have a lot of shit in my kitchen, but none of it is stuff that I don't use. It all has a home and a purpose. Otherwise, my girlfriend would have thrown it away months ago and I wouldn't have even known. Yeah, which is the rule. If you don't use it, it's got to go. Chris, what do you eat? As little as possible, sweetheart. No, no, I'm just kidding. He's not. Well, in L.A., I'm very blessed because obviously Jason is one of my personal chefs. And I have another friend, Jake, who is also a chef in the same way that Jason is. So I just show up. And I eat what is given to me, and it's usually of a very high quality. Well, before you show up, instead of asking me, you let me know that on Wednesday you will be cooking me dinner. Yeah, because I'm a bad bitch, Jason. I get what I want, okay? My man's taking me to Philippe. I'm getting my toes done, okay? It's worth it for me to prepare you that meal. The way you break me off afterwards.

Exactly, exactly. The toppy is worth it. But I think that I don't eat in the morning before I exercise, and then I have a sensible smoothie. As a Pasadena resident, you'll be familiar with Sun Life Organics. They opened in West Hollywood. So I get a Wolverine after my pump. What's the calorie count on that Wolverine, Chris? I don't know. It has nut butter, so it could be touching 800. No, it's not touching 800. The size is not great. It's a little small. It leaves me wanting more. There's dates in there? Yeah, there's dates. Yeah, you're at 800. Damn! Pia coming from my damn throat! Chris, you just got smoothie red like a little bitch. My favorite snack is a date stuffed with raw walnut butter. I don't know what... And sometimes I'll put dark chocolate on it. Yeah, that sounds heavily caloric. So the date, you slice it open surgically and then you insert a walnut butter, which is not cheap. Yeah, that's $20. And then do you take a bite and let that... Let's have date glizzy spurt? Or is it an all-in, like a fine piece of Nobu sushi? No, I do multiple bites. Multiple bites. Multiple bites. Okay. So you're saying it's a date stuff of walnut butter, and then you might drizzle a little dark chocolate? Yeah, but it's all sugar-free. I do the sugar-free dark chocolate Lily's chocolate chips. It's super dark, Chris. That does sound like a nice little snack. That's my dessert. That's not like a snack. I don't really snack, but that's like my dessert. Yeah, I don't. So, and then, so. Before my second workout, I'll try to have a banana. And a cold brew. And then for dinner, the way he's eating, a cheat meal for him would be sweet green. No, that's not true. Jason, you made me a Detroit-style pizza. Jake made me pizza. If you're alone at home, what do you eat? Do you live alone?

Well, I'm in L.A. right now. I'm displaced. I live in New York. I'm displaced. I thought you moved here. No, no, no, no, no. Don't get it twisted. That's false news from fucking Drudge Report Stewart over here. I fucking failing. I sue in or sweet green or like, you know. So a bowl full of steamed. Vegetables and brown rice is what you're slurping down. I'll freak it sometimes and have, you know, Pad Thai. Pad Thai would give me number three. I just think that I just realized. Asian food goes right through me. I like sushi, too. Sushi. I have a four-minute window from a... Wow, I'm surprised. You really seem like a... What's that sushi place you don't like, Jason? Sugarfish? Sugarfish is garbage. Hell yeah. P&S. It's made off-site. It tastes like plastic. That's not food. We've already established this is a Nobu podcast, so obviously we don't fuck with that. I just want to eat food that I made most of the time. I'm going to the farmer's market today. I'm also eating well because I don't spend that much money on food. My mom and I ate zucchinis that we grew in our garden last night with a pork chop. You know what I mean? I just eat sensibly and not every meal is some big thing. We're saving so much money not going out. You need that money for your bomb-ass natural wines that you are guzzling down every day at 4 p.m., right? I start with tequila and then we open a bottle. Wow. Really? So you love Ja Ja Ja tequila. I knew. I had a feeling that's the brand you like. That does take me back to podcasting with you at your house where while I was setting up the equipment, you know, it's about to turn 2.30 and then it's like... No, it would be after 4. No, no, I'm just kidding. It would be after 4, but it'd be like, should we have a drink? And then I'd be like, I could have a drink. And then we're like, wine? And we're like, tequila. It would always get the vibe set very nicely. How good is my little tequila drink I make? Yeah, the tequila, lime, soda. Yeah.

But like a lot of fresh lime juice or lemon. So if Jason and I started a tequila brand, let's just throw it out there. Who would be the Randy Gerber and who would be the George Clooney? Because I think this is a really interesting question because I think that, you know, I know I'm the Gerber, Chris. We all know I'm the Gerber. I mean, again, like I said to you before, Jason, that means that you are half of Kaya, which is an incredible accomplishment. That's what I'm saying. Kaya's a lesbian. I know. Which I called two years ago. But Cara Delevingne turns these chicks out. Pia is crazy. She slays. That tongue must be really doing something. You know what I'm saying? I don't find Cara to be attractive at all. I never really liked Cara either, but she's... She's gotten with a few of Chris's picks. Did you say, who are your picks? I don't know. Just like, you know. You do know, Chris. No, she hasn't really, I guess. I'm not really an Ashley Benson hat or anything. No. This is not your bed you're in. Yeah, I mean, I'm in a, what's an Airbnb? Oh, you're in an Airbnb. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. How weird. You just came here and you got, or you were like, I can't be in New York. I got to get out of here. It's been a, it's, it's a long journey that listeners are very familiar with, but I came here to find myself and it's worked. This is the, this is my, I'm, I'm just really feeling my authentic self because I'm, I don't know if you can tell, but I'm very tan, tropically tan, if you, if you will. And I'm just feeling very strong mentally and physically. And I think that the just pounding sun and level of creativity that Jason and I are able to accomplish on a daily basis is really pushing me towards a new me. So you really have been turned out by California. California does that. Your two main characteristics are now strong and tan.

Those are your two priorities. I mean, it's also like I'm really living, I get up early, I get a little work done, and then I'm spending most of my day outside if I'm not having to do this. Do you go to Claremont Lounge when you go to Atlanta? Well, it's been co-opted and turned into like a fake boutique hotel. Yeah, but the lounge is still down there, isn't it? Yeah, but you can't. Yeah, but she ain't going. That ain't the same. Do you want to hear a fun fact? Do you want to hear a fun fact? Pia, I didn't see you doing coke at a trough toilet in 2001. So you can't. Don't even try to talk to me. I am one of the only people who's been allowed to take photos of the Claremont Lounge. I took portraits of the strippers when I was there like eight years ago. She's the third Claremont twin. The Claremont triplet. Which rapper were you working with? I went by myself during the day. I had to go to Atlanta for something. And, like, I had, like, a full day alone. And everyone was like, well, you obviously have to go to the Claremont Lounge. And I was like, well, if it's open all day, like, obviously, like, the most authentic time to go there would be in the afternoon for, like, the, like, mozzarella sticks and, like, see the people who are actually in there. And it was unbelievable. And I ended up just, like, super throwing out with the security guard and letting me take photos of everyone. That's pretty – what else did you do in Atlanta? uh, ate a lot of barbecue. I'm like hung out at some friends houses. There was like a couple of good restaurants I went to, but this was like eight years ago. Well, I look, I've done it all. Um, the Claremont, not really for me, but there was a, there was a time when what's the, what's the Bambi I believe is the most famous. Um, and. So if a band's tour was ending in Atlanta, the headlining act would hire her to come strip on stage for the opening act. I got to look up Bambi. Pia, if you haven't seen Bambi to shake it for taking back Sunday, you've never really lived, okay? The early 2000s in Atlanta were... If you're saying, if you've never seen Dashboard Confessional feel very awful in front of his own fans...

If you've never seen Dashboard Confessional crump up a $20 bill and throw it at someone's butthole, you haven't lived. I don't like to call him Dash. I call him Chris because we're friends. But for the sake of the listener, I wanted them to know who I was talking about. I've never seen Dashboard Confessional, although 15-year-old me would have died for that. I saw my mom. I dropped my best friend off and I had a Blink-182 Unwritten Law concert one time and waited in the car. Unwritten Law is truly trash Southern California shit. That and MXPX. It was a bunch of bad... Did you grow up in Pasadena? Are you a Pasadena local? Yeah, this is the house I grew up in. Shit. Born and raised, bro. Yeah, but then I moved to New York when I was 18 and was there for 10 years and then came back. Did you go to college in New York or did you just go mob out? What? I'm attending New York in the fall to mob out. I've received a full ride to mob out. She graduated from Bintrill University, bitch. We know you graduated from Bintrill University. That's true. She got a PhD from Bintrill Enterprises. No, I did not. No, I did not. I went to Parsons. uh for fashion or design and merchandising but yeah fashion it was like kind of like product design and then uh i'm sorry it was design and management was my program design and management is fucking fascinating and every time i go back and i walk by the school i cry tears because i'm like i wish i remembered anything but pia you're a fucking small business owner what'd you call i think you called yourself a girl boss earlier no no no no no no i didn't I said. She was kicking facetiously. Right now. I know. That's my least favorite term. I think that's a term that is actually, it's been kind of amazing to watch the downfall of that. Just go completely like, that is like, it went from like the hottest phrase to say to like completely unacceptable to say. And it started like being like printed on coffee cups and like giving, and I was just like, we were. So you're saying that girl boss is your live, laugh, my mom's live, laugh, love. I get it. I understand now. I understand now. I understand now. Yeah. I mean, I just think everything can be, I just don't think it has to be. I also think it's this weird negative connotation that it's like.

you have to like, like, yeah, I'm a boss. It just, for me, it just seems like you're like, you're like bragging about being busy and like possibly like half-assing everything and being like late to all your meetings and like not seeing your family enough. That's contradictory to the Italian spirit. That is, that is. You guys, these, you motherfuckers don't work for months at a time because it's like hot outside. Because of La Familia. Yeah. They don't. They're really Italian. It's so, my God, trying to get, so Davide's there right now, and he was saying what's been fascinating is that, like, you literally can't tell an Italian to do anything. It's like the most stubborn group of people, and not one of them has said, I'm not wearing a mask. Wow. Interesting. They are being so, he's like, the streets are fucking empty every night, even though people are allowed to yell. Is he in Bologna? He's in Milano. Oh, I love Milan. I love a city where all the work happens. Milan is cold. I love it. I love Milan. I could live there. Why do you love Milan so much, Chris? It's just cool. I don't know. I've always liked this. It's the first time I went there. It just feels like the rest of Italy is out to fucking lunch, and that's the appeal of it. But Milan feels like people are going to work. Yeah, people are fucking working. I work at Prada. I'm going to work. Everyone who lives and works there are working for some of the most beautiful institutional companies in the entire... And there's a restaurant I really like there. Paper airplane? Specialita. Ah, sounds muy especial. It's like a place that you go on a Sunday night and it's full of Italians that are dressed really bad and then you find out one of them is famous. But it's not expensive. It's just good. Are you talking about John and Vinny's? I don't go to John. Any restaurant that plays Kanye West, I'm not eating at. John and Vinny's is so good.

John and Vinny's is good if you live in LA. I agree. John and Vinny's is so good. There's not a lot of good options. I think it's good, but the erection that people have for it is truly insane. I think the food quality itself is delicious and very high, but the branding and packaging and atmosphere and clientele. are turn offs for me unfortunately like guys guys you can't put a whole veil over stuff the food is fabulous of course there's gonna be some shoppers in there it's on fairfax you just go to brentwood you know what i mean hey pia you don't tell me to just go to brentwood okay i'm not talking about i don't i don't I don't mind seeing the shoppers in there. Just more of using John and Vinny's as a place to be seen for YouTuber-ass people is what turns me off. I just get annihilated in there off the most delicious wine and eat so much after you roll out. The food is good. That salad is really special. Yeah, that Calabrian chili dressing salad. That salad is big heat. The salad is big heat. The fusilli is stupid. and it's that facility go dummy is dummy good i agree have you have you tried squirrel um yeah i actually jason i forgot to tell you this it's too it's like i can't how am i gonna like get in there and like if i'm gonna have like a bad girl meal with carbs it's not gonna be like toast and jam and like brown rice bowl it's gonna be like If you wanted to go to Squirrel now, I did get a scene report. It is slow. Prime time, you could just walk right in now. I think Squirrel being cancelled and the mold incident happening was their 9-11 for flights. No safer time, no better time to go to Squirrel than right after it gets cancelled.

We have a very, like, wildly affectionate relationship. So your friends hate you. A little bit. I mean, they have to. Like, I look at some of our friends who, like, I just never see them kiss. I never see them hug. And everyone has a totally different love language. But, like, I'm just like. And we love each other so much that I'm just like, I'll go in his office and just like smell his cologne. Like, so having him be gone. I also like have to take the fucking trash bins down and like, like, like all like picking up all the poop for four dogs. You know, like I miss all this stuff. You got a damn, what is this? What's going on over here? You got a kennel. You got a foot play. Your mom is involved. I don't. This sounds like some fucking OnlyFans shit to me. I don't know what's going on over there. Actually, Pia, speaking of, I did have a dog question for you. Yeah. I know that you foster a lot of puppies and help with adoption and all that stuff. If we, like my girlfriend and I, she has a dog that's pretty old, like 11 years old, you know, probably a few more years. It's the time to get another one. You want to overlap them. So that's my question is if we get a second dog. will the first dog know that it's being replaced and make that dog sad? No, I mean, it totally depends. But sometimes the old dog will feel like they have a second wind. The new dog will keep them young. Okay. Because I was really afraid of that dog being like, oh, shit, it's my time. No, I mean, it depends. Every dog is different. I mean, you want to hope that he's not like, I fucking hate this other dog and start acting out. And if that does happen, I mean, you could, the best thing to do would be to foster. I would foster a dog instead of just adopting something. I would foster something. And then if, if the dog likes it, then you. adopt the dog, and that's fabulous. And if it doesn't, then network that thing and get it to adopt. Okay. You and I can talk offline more about adoption places. Please, I'm falling asleep. Pets are gross. You guys are insane. Slobber and poop? Are you guys fucking crazy? Pia, what do you think it means about Chris if he's so anti-pets? You're a complete sociopath. What? Complete sociopath just because I don't want to clean up after an animal?

Yeah, the fact that you don't want to be like, I need, like, what? No. You can't, you don't want an animal, like, sitting next to you like, hey, I love you. You want to go walk? You want to do this? What about a child, Chris? That's like a worse pet. It reminds me of 30 Rock when Tina Fey, she did a thing where, like, she was consoling somebody and she just patted him on the head and said, it okay. That reminds me of your potential parroting style. That reminds me of the major thing that I miss my husband for, which is replacing our water bottles. Because have you seen that episode of 30 Rock where Tina Fey has to replace the water? Oh, the Big Daddy Mountain Valley. She spills it everywhere. Do you have the glass Mountain Valley, Pia? Yes. You know what time it is, Chris. Damn, Pia. That's some bad bitch shit right there. You know what I'm saying? No, it's not. Stop acting like all this shit is expensive. Look, it's not that expensive, but it ain't no Arrowhead. We'll say that. I'm not. Yeah, you ain't got Nestle in the crib. Let live a little. I'm doing Mountain Valley for its mineral content. Damn, you really are. You really are on one. You really are like on some like, let me spend some money on some supplements. Yeah, I want to live a long time. Actually, you and Chris have a lot of similarities with this whole life thing. I'm glad that you were all able to come together. Chris doesn't have any cheat days. Can't trust him. No cheat days? Can't trust him? Sociopath? Get out of here, you bozo. I might be a sociopath, but I do have a sweet tooth and I will indulge. What's your go-to baggerl snack? Well... Wait, I'm sorry. What kind of snack? You're like bad girl snack. I'm just going to be bad. When you're really going to let the train off the rails. Those vegan cookies, Jason, the ones with the soft. They come in the brown bag. Those are good though. Come on. That's your like, that's like you're going to, I'm going to splurge snack is the vegan fucking cookies. That's a good snack. Sorry. Like we're saying that you need to indulge more.

Mine is like salt and vinegar potato chips, like doused in hot sauce. My mouth is water. Mine is eating Cheetos inside of a foot long sandwich. You guys are. Yeah. And look, you guys look great. I'm happy that's your journey. Some of us have different blocks that we just can't get through. I don't know what to tell you, bro. Do you drink? No, I've been sober. I mean, I'm sober. So of course I like sweets. Oh, now at all. She's like, okay, you are confirmed. I've dated one of you before. I've dated two of you before. Yeah, we're hot and cool, aren't we? It's pretty good. What can somebody learn that you, you know, what have you learned about dating a sober person that you could pass on to others? How do you tame this wild beast? The only way to really understand sobriety is attending AA meetings with the person that you love. I went to meetings every Sunday. We made it a day. It was our Sunday. I would go to the meetings and we would go to our favorite brunch place afterwards. There's a meeting by toast? It was the meeting in the Palisades. Thank you. Damn, that's some real shit. That's some good. I'm sure you saw some cool stuff there. Kevin Bacon in that one. I was just about to say who I saw and then realized I would be breaking. We would have edited that out. Number one rule. Yeah, that's like – and it's created a lot of empathy for me with a lot of people in my life and like my father. Like I had like aha moments at AA meetings where I was like, oh. Really? Yeah. It's like – Are you going to regular AA or are you going to Al-Anon? I don't like Al-Anon. I like regular AA meetings. Al-Anon is not for me. Hey, look, whatever floats your boat. Yeah, I didn't. I just felt like. She wants that real shit. Yeah. Like hearing people's stories firsthand and seeing the struggle and like seeing how everyone comes. Like all that was so beautiful and like the loving community and like that was really helpful. But like Al-Anon meetings, like talk, like for me it was like a little, it's a bunch of people who are just like sad and lost. It became like victim-y a little bit, which of course it should. But I was like.

Like, I'd rather get it straight from the source. I mean, it was great. I loved it. And it's given me a lot of insight and it's allowed me to speak in a more appropriate way to like, you know, I have friends who's like, have family members that have issues that they are so like, well, why doesn't he just get a job? And I'm like, this. Yeah, it's not that easy. Yeah. That's like not an option for him. Like, I mean, I think a lot of the world actually is like, what can you just stop, bro? Like, what's the problem? what? Like, just don't do it anymore. It's like, well, that's not really how it works. It's a little more complicated than that. It's like, it's funny how, how, I mean, I think that that stuff and, and similarly to, to, I think like pregnancy issues too. I think that stuff is talked about so much more now and like bigger forums. And it's definitely like the stigma is removed from it because I think honestly, for better or worse, I think social media is a huge part of that, a huge part of it. And I think it's like, I don't know if it, takes the stigma away or if people just feel more compelled to talk because it's easier um and the audience is already there but i think for a lot of things like that and a lot of just issues we have as a society in general you can find a lot more information than you could before you know absolutely do you only date sober sober women no no no no that's whack no no does it bother you when you're no alex might know my girlfriend drinks but not like really i mean you know like I don't know if I could deal with like a girl who's like, I'm going to do Molly on Friday night and then my weekend's ruined. But I also, that's the problem for me is that I think drugs are really cool. Like I don't, I think doing drugs, it's like baked into me to think that is cool. And it's very hard to, to like judge it any other way, even though I no longer participate. Like that era of my life, I didn't think it's the best era of my life, but like the things that I decided were like iconic to me.

involved drugs. So I think I'm just fucked on that, you know? That makes sense. I think smoking is iconic. Smoking is iconic. I mean, but it's stuff like that. Exactly. It's the same idea. It's like, this is iconic. I know. I get it. That's true. Chris's heroes are high on drugs all the time, or at least they were. They were in their prime. I think it's, it's, it's between Oasis and Lindsay Lohan in 2008. It's like, really, it's really the top of the top only. Like, I hate that it's funny because it's true. Chris, he's one of those sober people that you don't have to have it be a thing. I rolled a joint in front of him yesterday and we were making comments about the weed strain and stuff like that. Which I don't know if is a healthy thing to do. but I don't, I've had friends who are sober that have been sober for like 10 years that I like forget all the time that they're sober and they're like hanging out and it's not a thing. So I don't think it's like a, I don't, it's also like, I'm not in a situation where somebody is like, I think it's just, well, yeah. Or it's like, you're either there or you're not. Like if you, if you think something's going to tempt you, it's your responsibility to take yourself out of situation. You know what I mean? I'm not going to be like, but sitting at your house in Glendale while you, cheat and use a fucking cone to roll a joint that like you promised you wouldn't mention mention that watching jason once again be a little bitch when it comes to drug use i've seen it many times in our friendship um you know that's fine this guy wants to lick a fucking swisher so bad it hurts like Like ants on a log, baby. If I smoked weed, I would pass out instantly. Jason's drug intake at his age is pretty funny to watch because he's really a light lifter. Look at his body curled up in that chair. Look at those limbs. He has no place for his legs. I think only needing a little bit of marijuana is a good thing, Chris. It would be a problem if I had a two-eighths a day situation.

Well, I mean, I guess that makes it's cool because you'll have to go to cookies once a week instead of twice a week. That's right. To cop. So that's, yeah. Pia, what was your number one drug back in the game? We talking Xannies? We talking cocaine, baby. We talking cocaine? We talking cocaine! I'm not talking about this. Oh, you want to talk about wellness? You want to talk about vitamins? In 2005, what is coming out of that breast milk the most? I mean, I'm an uppers girl, dude. That's why you and Chris get along. Going to New York at 18 from Pasadena was definitely like... Because I didn't... alcohol was always available to me in my home. Like my dad poured me wine at the table when I was like 13. So I didn't, I wasn't like a big drinker. Like I wasn't like, look at like in all the girls in my class where we would like go to these parties and they would just have like forties in their hands and they'd be so drunk. And like, I would look at them and be like, you look really like trashy and you look very available to be taken advantage of. And it completely made me like, I don't like that. I'm going to stick with my digestive. Not that I didn't drink, because I would like... Oh, Pia, we know you were sucking down a vodka soda. Don't worry. In high school, I was at Koi having, like, hypnotic martinis. Hypnotic martini at Koi. I feel like I'm watching an episode of Entourage. Yeah, if we want to talk about love languages, being at Koi, that's mine. I had a standing reservation every Friday when I was a senior in high school. So funny. Koi's a long way from Pasadena, too. All my friends would rip out to the... We would be like, let's go to the... I would go to guys. The Range Rover gets pretty good gas mileage back then, Jason. It's a little different. You'd be surprised. I did not have a Range Rover. I had an old Jeep that I paid for. Thank you. Classical Jeep.

Standing Rez at Koi in high school is very, very cool. Pia, what kind of relationship did you have with the cast members of The Hills? That's actually a good question. It was like a quick miss. Two ships in the night. I worked at people's... I lived with Kelly Catron. You worked for the god Kelly Catron? I've lived in her fucking in the back of the showroom because I couldn't afford it. Can you get her on this podcast? Do you think? Or what's the relationship? Yeah. I talked to her all the time. That would be very cool for us. She'd be like, who the fuck are you two? Why am I doing this? I'm sorry. So, but I was like, and I experienced this too. Like all my best friends I grew up with in high school who like moved to New York after college. Like I didn't, we talk about it all the time. Cause now. Like, I didn't see them. Like, the four years they lived in New York, like, all the girls that I grew up with and, like, from, like, Pasadena and Newport, like, they all lived on, like, the west side and, like, went to completely different bars. And, like, I was just, like, I didn't do any of that. You were down to slum it. I was, like, I love dive bars, like, so much. Well, let's be honest. Let's be honest, P.M. The hotter guys are at the dive bars. Let's be honest. No, it would have been smarter for me to go to where they were hanging out and, like, bag of fucking rich dudes. I didn't say rich, P.S. I said hot. My mom would always tell me, like, just go to the finance, like, area and go to the bars, like, after they get off work. And I was like, you want me to, like, marry, like, a finance guy that, like, has, like... like strangle him to come. And she's like, yes. Yes, we heard exactly. Can you stop bringing these boys home who have these dickies on all the time? Yeah, the guys I brought home. Why do all these guys smell so funny? I loved 11th Street Bar. Like that old Irish man owns it and you can get a grilled cheese. No, no, no, no, no. I'm not doing it. That's a little too divey for me. Black and white was like as divey as I'd go.

I love to see bars more dignified than black and white. Black and white was like, black and white was wild. Lit was super fun. That was like, I'm really thankful that I experienced all of that. Like, I can't believe that I got to live like that where I would just like survive off of such minimal sleep, like still function so well at work. Like I pretty much ate whatever I wanted. I had, I mean. I miss it all. I'm like, I just want to go to Cafe Mogador and Billy Strowback and hug over and drink and then go to the fish when it opens. As a person who lives in the East Village and goes to Mogador all the time, he's still sitting there. So you could go at any point. You could go at any point and they would be there. Once the quarantine's all over, we can get a table for three at Mog for some $18 eggs and some tomato sauce. Honestly, it's top three restaurants in New York for me, though. Hands down. Un-fucking-believable. Jason, it's an institution, bro. And also, you know what? So is Burger King. But it's a classic New York restaurant where they still hire people based on their look. Every girl, every girl, it's, like, crazy. It's, like, the way that they hire, like, bad actresses in L.A., they hire, like, models to be in New York. Well, girls in New York, so sorry. This is obviously a controversial statement. But girls in New York. are way hotter because they don't care like they're just like so ultimately themselves there's not like friends happening they don't all like have all like the fillers and shit that like we have here like when i got when i got a boob job i woke up and the anesthesia wore off like my fur and i looked at my doctor and i said you know what i fucking said i said new york pia would have never gotten a boob job damn Really makes you think. I think maybe that's why I still have such an all-natural look. I never thought about that. It's really all. And those girls don't wear. And that was my favorite job in New York, being a waitress and not wearing that much makeup. Where did you work? I worked at Manjami for like three years. It's not open anymore. Now it's Pepe Rosso. Oh, okay, okay, okay, okay. Have you ever been in there? Yes.

John Franco, the cute little owner dude, he used to have Manjami with his ex-wife that I worked there, and that was so fun. And it would turn into a dance party at 11. Lock the doors, Marc Maron voice. I know exactly what you mean by that. And then I was on stand-in, and then I would walk over and go to the box, or I would go to – I worked at the box. I DJed at the box one time. Did you, TJ? They weren't into my flavor of music. We'll see that. Oh, 201? 201 was open? You mean the basement when it was all silver, when it was the fake Warhol? Yeah. That didn't do much for me. That was short-lived. It was short-lived, but it was so slow. I don't like Christie Street. Why? Can't be bothered. Just never have. I don't like it. I'm good on Christie Street. I don't like to walk down it. I don't want to stumble out of the box late night. The best part is the box still open and I bet thriving. Yeah, 100%. It's open right now? Not during quarantine, but in general as a business, it's still open. I went to the one in London. It was unbelievable. Mate, was it fucking tent? What were they playing at? How fit were those box birds? Pia, thank you so much for doing this podcast with us. Pia, honestly, this might be the most fun I've ever had on this show. I can't even lie. You need to cut out half of it. Do you want to see my puppy before we go? Yeah, we're not really cutting anything out of this. We don't do much editing, Pia. I don't know if Jason told you. Hey, how's everything going in the quarantine? In all of this that's going on. What's up? How long, goners? How long? What was the second one? How long fuck sticks? That is so dumb. It is. I mean, I feel like, unfortunately, Marc Maron, his pod is not really hitting anymore. Really? I mean, I think just like the guests, you know, kind of like throwing fits or something, like the guests just haven't been so good lately. I thought he had somebody pretty big recently, actually. He may have.

But it's tough. For a show like that, you're only as strong as whoever you have on if it's a solo thing. Is he on those comedy charts? He's still top 10. He's still pretty high up, but I don't think he's top 10 anymore. That's pretty crazy. But he maintains a real solid... He's still making millions of dollars every year off of his show. The crazy part is he's actually been able to turn it into a real business. As far as... He's an actor now, like for real. Yeah, he is a for real actor, and he probably has like one person on staff. Oh, okay, we're back. Buongiorno! That is a cute-ass dog. This is Nutella. Oh, you didn't have to go and do all that. She's only 10 weeks old. Look at that. Look at them floppy-ass paws. Little motherfucker tripping over himself. She's going to be 150 pounds. Look how big this dog is. She's almost as big as Chi-Chi. So this is like a mastiff? What is this? She's a South African bauble mastiff. South African bauble mastiff. Okay. Pia, thanks for being on the show. Love the dog. Nice to meet you, Nutella. Pia, you need to tell our devout listeners where they can find your podcast and your personal brand as well. My name is Pia Baranchini, and that's where you can find me on Instagram, and my podcast is called Everything is the Best. Okay. What did you want more of, Chris? No, that's exactly what we wanted. No, that's all I wanted. I loved it. We'll check it out. For two fellas like us, which episode would you recommend us listening to first? I listened to the episode that came out yesterday, by the way. You did? It was a lot of crying. You're right. Pia, what episode would you recommend for, like, the 25-year-old white incels that actually listen to this podcast? I would listen to, like, all my guy friends really, really loved the episode with Dr. Lekos if you want, like, some health stuff. Okay, great. Or the episode with, oh, Evan Funke from Felix. Oh, Funke! I'll listen to that little bread maker. That's fine. Little pasta chef. We can talk to it. We can listen to that.

I just followed you back on Instagram, Chris. Oh, wow. Thank you for blessing me with a follow back a year later. Thank you. Wow. Feeling really good. I love to get followed by blue checks. It really does something for me. Well, your fucking thing is a whole, like, what is this? A brand like done with the death project. So I'm like, no, I don't know. This is you. Well, that's... And there's not one photo of you here and all these... Like, I'm a fucking modern chair and a fucking girl. No, I don't know this is you. You're not giving me much. God, I'm so glad I'm recording all of this. Is this your apartment? I wish. That's a set from a Ralph Lauren shoot. But thank you for thinking that's my apartment. That's pretty cool of you. I don't know. Your shit, you got good taste. You've been doing this shit for a long time. All right, guys. As much as I would love to stay in keeping... I have a three o'clock call. I have to hop to. I'm going to play tennis. See you guys later.