711. - Jack Wagner

All right, this episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Stateside with Kai and Carter, a new podcast from The Guardian. And they are using this podcast to slow down the news and wrestle with the questions that we all have about what's happening in the world. And they do it three times a week. Jason, does that sound familiar to you? We don't really talk about, you know, a lot of international global news items and climates and cultures and sports and things like that. We do talk about fashion and wellness, but for everything else, Kai and Carter are a great place. All right, so who couldn't use more news? Listen wherever you get your podcast. or watch on youtube how long gone we're back uh I'm in New York. Them jeans is in LA. What's really good, baby? I just got out of the sauna moments ago. I'm still a little schvitzy. I have a nice iced green tea. I'm looking at nonstick carbon steel cookware online. It's a beautiful fucking Tuesday, man. I'll tell you what. Carbon steel? Does that make it lighter? that's that's a good guess now basically there's like the you probably have heard about it like there's a movement against people using non-stick cookware the teflon the microplastics the chemicals blah blah blah so a lot of brands are starting to do like if you if you properly treat a cast iron skillet it'll be naturally non-stick but it requires a lot of upkeep and maintenance that most people don't want to do and there's another thing called carbon steel which is sort of like a hybrid of different pans where it's a little bit lighter. So you can consider it kind of like a lighter cast iron where it still retains a lot of heat. It's kind of like a walk is the metal that you would most be comfortable and familiar with. Think about a walk.

a wok metal. But if you properly maintain it, you can fry an egg and it'll be nonstick if you do it the right way. Okay, yeah, because I've used a lot of woks in my time. You haven't personally been in the fire, but you go to a lot of Asian eateries and you enjoy the food of various countries like China. I do love Asian eateries. Don't say China in that voice. Japan. I caught what you were doing. What they're doing with the woks over in China is very impressive. We were talking about this earlier in the group chat, but our boy Tom Brazy, former quarterback and now on-air personality football player, he got in trouble, first of all, for his first day on the air calling a quarterback a spaz, which you cannot do anymore. So he got killed. He got hit for that. He got CTE from that hit. He got CTE from that. And then his ex... His ex-chick who left him and his, you know, $500 million for a jujitsu instructor like surfer guy announced that she was pregnant with this new guy's child. And then Tom Brady presented. He posted basically a kind of dramatic sunset view video with a cover by the chicks. of Landslide. Formerly known as the Dixie Chicks covering Fleetwood Mac's Landslide. What an epic breakup tune. Epic breakup tune. Classic breakup tune. Classic breakup tune. There's a lot to chew on here with Tom Brady still licking his wounds from the Netflix roast as well a couple months ago. Let's not forget about the roast. Being really just taken to task, bent over backwards by comedian of the day Tony Henchcliffe, famous Puerto Rican hater. yeah going through it so so tom and also we we the girl that left him for this uh jujitsu guy on any given day known as the most beautiful woman alive in the last hundred years not just i didn't mean to i didn't mean to bury the lead that not as any old barn wench we're talking about giselle it is giselle g easy come on the pod soon but giselle come on the pod second someone who is um kind of known by her first name which is a powerful

a powerful thing. Also that. You know, because if you say Tom, we could be talking about a lot of people. If you say Giselle, there's only one person you could be talking about, and that's true, Madonna. You're going to make me guess famous Toms. Yeah, don't start. Pull up a chair. We'll be here for a while. Well, speaking of famous Toms, I hate to bring up Tom Arnold, but he was the guest on Armie Hammer's new podcast, our favorite. Our favorite fucking cannibal has come into our arena. Top 10. Top 10. Not favorite. Go ahead. Top 10 cannibals. Armie Hammer, known stick man, who is now in recovery. And you can tell by the way he talks. Yeah. He'll put a bitch's ear on a stick and put it on the fucking hibachi. He's coming into the podcasting terror dome to duel. With people he meets in his AA meetings is what it sounds like with the Tom Arnold situation. It's an easy get. It's an easy get. They smoked six cigarettes and decided they were going to do it. You have a dope story. Dude, it's super dope that you shared. I would love for Armie Hammer to come on How Long Gone. I think this is a time for a cross promotion. We're not going to platform. bad politicians. I'm not going to have Donald Trump on this podcast. I'm not going to have J.D. Vance on this podcast. But accused cannibals, I think that's where we'll let it slide. I hope you agree. I mean, looks come into play. He still is a heartthrob for many of our female and male listeners. That's true. I mean, I'm sure from some of the most toxic chicas who subscribe to us down to a friend of the show, Andrews. Wouldn't mind chucking a leg over that log. You watch the social network on an airplane and you see, hey, we're 6'5 and there's two of us. It's spit roast time. Bend me over in first class. I would love to be in the Cayman Islands locked in a hotel room smoking a DMT pen with Armie Hammer. Honestly, nothing sounds better to me. You're so fucking beautiful. Have I ever told you that? Armie, I want to welcome you. I'm sure you're listening. I want to welcome you to podcasting. The show is called Armie Hammer Time. The logo looks like it's for an axe throwing bar.

Kind of is the vibe in Austin. I'm glad you said that. I was driving by. There's this giant fucking crazy white boy, crazy with the K monster truck. And on the back of it, it had a giant phone number and website. And the truck itself is a mobile axe throwing bar, I guess. You can hire this guy for a mobile axe throwing event, which makes me also think that isn't any guy with an axe a mobile? That's a good point. Axe throwing company. I guess you need targets. But the logo, yeah, you do need some, I need a piece of wood or a hay bale and then we'll get the URL purchased. Anyway, the logo for the podcast for Army Hammer Time, it really, it does look like that. But to me, when I first saw it, it evoked early memories of when podcasting first started and the early settlers of Apple. apple and this is way before spotify was even a founded nation and it was just these little pet project logos that someone's like you know my cousin made the logo and it's isn't it it's two hammers crossing and then instead of like a skull and crossbones the skull is a microphone and the font is just like the worst da font font you could ever think of but not but not any old not any old microphone kind of a 50s style elvis microphone you know what I mean recognizable it's not an SM57 yeah like a guy who has like a what if all my crazy guys from the construction site started a podcast kind of feel or like me and my cousin who fix up old cars I think we can probably make it pretty big in the podcasting space talking about how we fix up old cars it has that kind of feel it has like an innocence a pure podcast hey I'm Armie Hammer I'm in a little bit of a trouble financially right now. I famously had to sell my truck at Cargurus in Sherman Oaks to pay my rent. Things aren't going well. Things aren't going great. Oh, yes. I forgot I could just start a podcast and I will be on my way to millions of dollars. He's on his way. And it's nice to see celebrities still experiencing that for the first time. That's true. That's true. We thought that was over, but it's not. I also saw that.

Friend of the show, 50 Cent, turned down doing Trump MSG Con for three mil, apparently, is what he's saying he was offered. He said, you can hold your little three bag. He said, I sold vitamin water back in the day when money meant something. I don't need your little dirty check. But it's very cool for 50 Cent to turn that down. He knows better. Whereas Fat Joe couldn't turn down the World Series. And that was free of charge. Yeah, I mean, 50 still likes fucking black chicks. That's true. He needs the Kamala vote for that. Yeah, he does need the Kamala vote for that. He's on the right side of history. Yeah, I saw this video of Fat Joe because I guess Fat Joe coming out at the Yankees Dodgers game. We talked about this when I mentioned that Ice Cube came out in LA. Yeah, this is our answer to that, I guess. I took no pleasure in handing New York the L. If we're going to do rapper versus rapper at games two and three, it is surprising. They couldn't get somebody a little cooler. Um, but I, I also, I listened, you know, partly from Joe Budden, but partly from other podcasts, there's like, I would have taken a Takashi six, nine. There's a thing about fat Joe apparently where like, he just, he's been on so many podcasts and in so many interviews and shit. And he just like every, he basically has like a different origin story every time he talks. And people just let him rock and think it's funny, kind of, which I do also think. Because he's a good storyteller, and you're just like, I don't care how real or fake this is. Yeah, I don't care. It's like, yeah, he was there for everything. He did this. He did that. None of it matters. He just does his thing, and everybody lets it rock, which I do like. He's taken a page out of Lana Del Rey's campy energy. Fat Joe's being brat. He's being a little rascal. come come catch me you can't track me down he's a rascal but it was nice to see some tims on the on the pitcher's mound it was nice to see a terror squad logo embroidered into a yankees fitted and you know it felt nice taking me back to i do love 2000 whatever that was i do love the terror squad logo that's it that's a really good one yeah that's really that's a really good one what do you think the last thing the last time fat joe terrorized something that wasn't edible god damn it this kid didn't do a homework

I mean, yeah, I'm sure he's got several kids. Maybe when his barber fucked up the line on his beard, you know, that could be something that could really piss him off. That's exactly what it was. It was either that or the gardener fucked up one of his hedges in Newark. Which is the same thing as a beard, kind of, when you think about it. You know, it's the same thing. Damn, bro. Third eye. Third eye wide up. Oh, I wanted to really quick, before I forget, give a shout out. Congrats to listeners of the show. matt and larissa they got married last weekend just want to give a shout out friend of the show reached out so uh congrats y'all who are they who are they friend who are they friends of i ain't never heard of either of them it's just it's just larissa and matt don't worry about them bro i'm i'm busy looking at a san francisco standard article i just saw that says man tries to ride muni with dead raccoon And it's a video of a guy just holding a full-size dead raccoon trying to board the train. Bro, that's not the news. That happens every hour on the hour in part, right? Bro, that's correct. But the photo of this is just so clear, like what's happening, that it's really good. It's really, really good. Was it shot on the iPhone 16? Just like the New York Magazine media story, all of the portraits were shot on iPhone 16. The all-new iPhone 16, which I have in my possession. right now and i can't tell the difference between this and the other one so i don't know what i'm getting i don't know interesting what i paid for look i've spent some time in the tenderloin call me when the raccoon is alive okay a dead one on the train whatever yeah that you're you're give me something alive and we got some news there honestly i stand with you on that if the shit ain't if the shit ain't breathing or jogging i don't care uh we have a guest today that's right friend of the program uh is joining us all the way from Where does he live now? Somewhere deep LA. I think he's Altadena adjacent. I don't want to fully dox him, but yeah, he's over there. I don't want to dox him either. He's already doxed by ghosts. But yeah, Jack Wagner, our friend. Doxed by ghosts. That's good. Who's been on the show before. You know his podcast, Otherworld, which has gotten very popular where he talks about.

kind of spooky shit and uncovers all kinds of stuff. We're not going to talk about any of that today because I have no interest in it, but Jack is a very funny guy. We're going to talk about how we hate gay Halloween and stuff like that, but yeah, he's a very funny guy and an old friend of ours, pod veteran. I don't hate gay Halloween. I hate Halloween. I want to be clear. I don't... Let me be clear. I hate Halloween, but gay Halloween is the best version of it, I would say. You love, okay, so you hate Halloween. If you're going to have to choke it down, at least make it gay is what you're saying. You have no problem with the gay people, the holiday itself. It's too spooktacular. It's too spooktacular for me. That's exactly what's going on. Once again, it's too spooktacular for me. I'm a little baby. I guess let's give him a call. Let's give him a call. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by a new podcast from The Guardian stateside with Kai and Carter. This is covering a lot of our bases, Jason. It's trying to slow down. The news and wrestle with the questions we all have about what's happening in the world. And I know you particularly have quite a lot of questions. A lot of questions, but how often? Because we do this podcast three times a week and that's a sweet spot. How many times do they do? Three times a week. And I have a feeling just based on the platform and these talking points that they're maybe going to be covering different stuff than we do. That's just a guess. The Guardian is not some billionaire owned. They're not afraid to say what they want to say, brother. Yeah, Rupert ain't sniffing around in what journalists Kai Wright and Carter Sherman are up to over there at Stateside. But yeah, listen wherever you get your podcasts. You can watch it on YouTube. It's three times a week. And who couldn't use more news? You know, especially when it's not, you know, from here, let's say. Give it a listen. Give it a listen. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Squarespace. Obviously, Jason, you and I spend a lot of time on the World Wide Web. So do our peers, our listeners, our friends, our colleagues. Obviously. Maybe even your parents if they're freaky. And if you're doing anything in the world, writing, taking pictures. I do topless boxing. You need a website. Exactly. A website that works, that does what it's supposed to do, that allows you to be creative but also business-minded.

Jason, there's one place to go for that, Squarespace. Yeah, Chris, I'm over here. I'm modifying calculators and putting Claude inside of them so you could cheat at school. And I just want a place where I could, you know, have everything all in one place. I can have the SEO tools so those future graduates can find me. And, you know, I'm able to accept, quote unquote, donations for my services that might be gray area. You know what I mean? And then email campaigns. Hey, I got a new 2.3 version upgrade. Boom, boom, boom. Get the analytics going. Raise some money. Show your investor all of your cool analytics of what's going on. They're going to want to get in early. And we can use Blueprint AI to make your website look as professional as your competition, if not more. Head to squarespace.com slash howlong for a free trial. When you're ready to launch, use offer code howlong to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain. Damn, he got a little bit of money. He got soundproofing in his shit. He got a little bit of money, that Patreon hitting. Jack got a little check. We were talking earlier about... Because you live very far away. You live in coyote country. Is it even considered Los Angeles? Dude, I live in East L.A. Coyote country. I live in East L.A. But East L.A., I don't want to... You as a WeHo man. We don't want to dox you. We're not trying to dox you, but what... I mean, I live in Alhambra. Okay, I don't know. Alhambra. I thought that's a place I've probably driven by on the highway, I would guess, but what happens... Probably. Why would you go there? Because of the space that you're able to get, of course, for your money? Yeah, for sure. Yeah, like a house and a yard and stuff. I mean, we're renting the house, but we've been there forever. It's probably be there for a little while. Alhambra, Chris, also known as a great place to find flavors of the Orient as well. That's true. A lot of good food. Okay, so you're eating good. Bomb ass food. You're eating good. And what are your neighbors like? Super chill, pretty much. I mean, I had some crazy neighbors, dude. I had some crazy neighbors for a minute. This was a long time ago.

But I immediately thought of that. Not in this house, in a different house. In the same house. In the same house. What were they doing? Like, day one threatening to kill me. All right. Welcome to the neighborhood. I will literally kill you if you look at me. They just didn't like the cut of your jib? They just looked at you and said, nope. Okay, we can't have this turn into the entire episode. Don't worry. Put it this way. There were big Brandon Wardell fans. They didn't like the split. I didn't know people even moved into the house. I go like we're still new. This is probably a month and a half into living there. I go put gas in my car because we're going on a road trip, return home and like see everybody in my house. We had guests like at the side door looking at this lady that's like standing there with a swivel chair and everybody's really tense. And I go over and I'm like, hey, what's going on, everybody? I'm like, what's what's happening? And everybody's like locked up. Everybody in my house looks crazed. Like, I'm just trying to parse, like, what is going on and nobody will say anything. They're spazzing out. Yeah. It took me literally, like, 10 minutes of being like, what is happening? What is going on, guys? And finally, I got a lot of them that, like, this woman now lives next door and she is accusing us of building a meth lab under her house. And the reason she thinks that is because she heard us in her pipes last night. This sounds like a dream for her because this theory is obviously concocted by someone who is on meth. 100%. 100%. Okay, so you got the Alhambra meth heads next door. This is a very suburban area. There's like... Like the fact that there's a meth situation is shocking. See, here's the thing, Jack. That's where the meth, that's where they got to go. I don't know if you've ever seen television show, you know, Weeds or something like that. It's always, it's always in the, it's always the sequel, the sequel to Weeds, Meths. It's always in, it's always in a pleasant, it's always in a pleasant suburban neighborhood. Then all of a sudden the house explodes. The garage is on fire. You know, chemicals are in the air. Yeah. Jack, you've seen Friday after next in Rancho Cucamonga where the Mexican homies are running drugs.

out of there, but their sister is really fine and we have to fuck her? Well, Rancho Cucamonga is very different. Rancho Cucamonga is one of those cities that sounds like it's people making up something to make fun of California. It doesn't feel real. It's right on the edge of the desert. On Friday after next, Ice Cube's dad famously refers to it as Rancho Chica Minguez. It's a fun word to just mess up, you know? Where is Rancho and what goes down there? Obviously, I'm not as familiar with California as you two, long-time locals. I mean, I wouldn't call myself a long-time local. Not like Jason. I'm originally from Chicago. We know, but I was trying to let you bury that. Respect. You go to Chicago more than me. I do. Chris, it's the Aurora of Los Angeles. Okay, thank you. I have probably been to Chicago more than you have in the last year, but that's just because it's closer to me, I would say. I would never go there to visit family. I like that statement. And Jack, you are not involved in FX as the bear at all, so why would you really go? That is true. Your family's not there anymore? My family's not there, so I've not gone back in a long time. Where are they? Where'd they go? like scattered okay Pennsylvania Florida Arizona wow all the hot spots I just I know close your eyes and pick one I mean that's a dream exactly these are all great places to to start up an underground meth lab I've never I've never been to I've never been to Arizona but it's at the top of my list if I'm keeping it a stack really why I don't know because it just feels like a place that I've never been that's going to be kind of weird and I'm I'm interested in that that's you'll definitely get that I've been to the airport, but you know what I mean? It's like everywhere else. I don't know. Like the Midwest, I'm very familiar with. The Northeast, I'm familiar with. The West Coast, I'm familiar with. I think you could have a fun weekend in Scottsdale. If you played golf, it would be a lot better. But if you just want to have a lazy lunch where there's misters hitting you, you'll be fine. But there's no reason to go to Phoenix. Well, I'm trying to build. I'm trying to get more athletes in my social circle. I feel like I've maxed out on musicians.

And I need to get, and athletes tend to spend their off season in places like Scottsdale and Phoenix because you can train year round because of the warm weather. Yeah, it's good for my arm. Last time I was in Scottsdale, I had an insane evening. My dad, who's normally not a great host, was a strangely good host upon our arrival. My sister and my wife showing up there with me. And yeah, he had like a full plan. He took us to this nice dinner and he's like, afterwards, there's a rodeo. On the grounds of this barbecue place we're going, it's like this big barbecue slash rodeo slash dance place. Medieval times. Kind of. It's dinner and theater. It's going weirdly good, except we get to the rodeo, which I'm very excited about. The first guy comes out, and one of the rodeo clowns gets kicked by the bull, flipped multiple times in the air. I'm actually recording it. on my phone because I'm like wow this is going to be a cool Instagram post that I'm going to be able to make like the rodeo footage I recorded a man probably epic rodeo fail I'm pretty sure he died okay so Okay, and you said this is the very first thing that happens in the rodeo. Welcome. Yes. They open the gates. The bull comes out and more or less murders a man within 10 seconds. Okay, so the vibes change. The vibes change. No, the craziest aftermath. They kept the music playing for quite some time while they tried to help the man. And then slowly the energy turned. Let's get retarded in here. No, literally it was like that for a while. As it got worse, I knew it was taking a real turn for the worse when the announcer led everybody in a prayer, led the entire stadium in a prayer for this guy. By the way, he did survive, I think. I'm pretty sure this guy did survive, but it was not looking good that night. It really, really put a damper on things. It was touching God. And the entire stadium was just watching this unfold for about 45 minutes. They didn't get...

Get him out of there. How did your dad handle it? He just kept drinking his Corona. Is your dad a cowboy? Or is this just what he wanted to take you guys to do? No, he just thought it sounded fun. Did your dad find a way to blame the whole accident on you? No, no, no, no. He was very laissez-faire about it. He was... Well, when you're accustomed to the way home, that was wild. When you spend a lot of time around... Mess with the bull, you get the horns. When you spend a lot of time around animals like that, you know that it's a risk. And you know that they could buck at any point. And that's it for you. You sound like the announcer. This is literally the type of shit he was saying while this man was fighting for his life unconscious on the ground. I'm very scared of horses, actually. I don't understand the fascination with horses. I mean, I like the rich women who ride them, but I don't like the culture around it. But the actual animals are terrifying and they will kill you. And I don't understand what... I don't... I just don't like animals, I guess. Fair enough. So at every stage, I'm just like, why the fuck would you risk this? Yeah, but I would say there's a difference between not liking an animal and being deathly afraid of them. Deathly? No one said deathly. Sorry, not deathly, but you said very afraid. When you and I were at Plum Sykes' country house in the Cotswolds, she had a couple beautiful, elegant horses trotting around free and openly on her grounds. And maybe I touched the mane. Maybe I gave it a pet. And when you saw the horse, what were you thinking? Get me the hell out of here? No, I was just happy it was behind a fence. We were separated. You respect it. It's a powerful animal. I have great respect for horses because they're beautiful and powerful. I don't want to pet one. I don't want to ride one. I don't want to do any of that shit. I'll go to an equestrian. If the Olsens invite me to one of their meets, I'll go. But otherwise, I don't think I have no business. I never want to ride a horse because I feel bad. My ass is too fat. You're too big, bro. Your legs would touch the ground. I watch so much.

I watched so much of that show. What was the show? Why am I blanking on the show name, Jason? Yellowstone? The ranch, the Dutton Ranch. Yeah, I watched so much Yellowstone that I think by the end of like one 12-hour Delta flight, I thought I could ride a horse from just watching so much television. And I didn't want to find out the hard way that that is untrue. You picked up most of the ins and outs of horse maintenance through watching that show. Well, the thing on that show that happens a lot with horses is, you know, if they get too hurt, you got to put them down. You know, you got to kind of take them out to pasture and put a couple in them, you know, and that's a lot of people down in that show. Yeah. There are a lot of people, people, animals, everybody's going down. Do they eat the cow? I mean, do they eat the horse after they kill it on that show? No, no, no, no. You, you like bury it. Like you like respect because those are your, those, that's how you make your money. That's true. That's life on the ranch for you. I guess when you're on the ranch and you kill the horse, you probably use a gun. And I wanted to use that as a way to transition into... I lobbed that to you because that's where my head was. I lobbed that to you. Thank you for that. This is the power of a pod duo who's cooking with grease, Jack. You know what the vibe is. But we only have two days, three days left maximum in Glocktober. And I wanted to talk to you about the festival of Glocktoberfest that you chose to participate in this year. Glocktoberfest. Yeah, I just bought a Glock. Okay. Because that's what you're referring to. Are you... I'll be honest. It was kind of an impulse buy. Okay. Hold on. It was a Saturday. My friends were going to Glocktoberfest at Turner's Outdoors. It's like a... sporting goods stores out here. It's not a Barney's Warehouse sale, bro. This is a big decision. I don't have any friends that were hitting Glocktoberfest. Honestly, I didn't think about it too much. So I guess that's why I didn't go. I didn't get the invite. Do you own weapons already? I have like, you know, one gun. Okay. What kind of gun? An AR-15? Something illegal? A .38 Special. Okay. Like this? Okay. Okay. So you already popped the cherry. I think buying your first gun, you've already gone over the hill, so you know what it's like.

You're a little desensitized. You're already a gun person, more or less, by owning a .38 Special as your first and only gun. You're a gun person. I didn't technically buy the .38 Special. Who gave it to you? Your dad? It was given to me by a guy. By a guy? Okay. What kind of guy? We don't need to get into it. We do need to get into it. That's literally why we do this show. All right, so a guy gave you a gun. How canceled is this guy? Quick question, is the serial number kind of off, or is it still on? It was that vibe of a situation, but the serial number's on there. Did somebody owe you money, and this is how they paid you? Do you have to give the gun back to this guy at a certain point? There's a family friend that is known to show up to Thanksgiving with a bag of pomegranates and ammunition, and sometimes there might be a weird gun in there. And one of these times, I took it. So you're fishing through the pomegranate bag and you stumble on some cold, hard steel. And you said, I'm going to tuck this in the back of my Levi's. Like when a businessman comes home in the 60s and, Daddy, Daddy, what'd you bring us? He opens his duffel bag. Loose pomegranates and guns? Yeah. I'm not lying. I also don't want to blow up this person's spot. I'll probably bring it back after the... Glocktoberfest celebration. At Glocktoberfest, was it humming? Were they giving out chili? There was not really a party. It's more of a sale. It's just a sale. Chris, think of it as Alexis December to remember. That's what I was thinking. Did your Glock come with a red bow? Probably not. Well, dude, I went to go pick it up today. I was an hour early. There was like a two-week waiting period. I didn't know it was two weeks on the dot. For you, I would have said three. I would have said three, bro, if it was you. Okay, so you're saying they're like, no, no, we have it time-stamped? And you had to turn around and leave, or you just killed an hour? Completely wasted my morning. You walked into Turner, and they're like, this guy's a little bit of an eager beaver. Do you live near any schools or anything like that? Is that what they were thinking? Has this guy ever worn any Joker mask? Any Joker face paint?

They did. When they test you or make you fill out all the paperwork, they do ask you out loud, have you ever been found by a court to be criminally insane? And it's like a question where it's hard not to audibly laugh out loud. I did. Because it sounds like a Limp Bizkit lyric? Yeah, exactly. Criminally insane. Sounds like an Eminem song. But also, the person asking this question, are they inbred? Do they seem normal? They seem normal. They seem normal, but are they wearing tactical clothing, and do you think they have five or six guns hidden on their person? No, it's always like a Chinese guy in a polo shirt. Oh, I'm back. All right, this episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Quince. Jason, the temps are warming up. It's getting hot out there. Summer always changes how I get dressed. I need pieces that feel lighter. more breathable, and they're just easy, but still put together. I don't want to look like a slob. That's why I keep coming back to Quince. They focus on high-quality essentials that feel and look amazing. Breathable linen and soft organic cottons, well-made basics, but without the luxury markups. That rare balance where everything feels elevated. but still effortless. Yeah, Chris, linen season is here. I wore a linen blazer to dinner a few nights ago in the warm California sun. But, you know, you got that Italy trip coming up this summer and quality European linen pants and shirts. Upgrade that look starting at just $34. You know, if you get a nice linen suit, a little t-shirt underneath it, some chill shoes, you're looking good, but you're staying cool. The inside of your special areas are nice and dry as you turn up with your besties. So elevate that summer wardrobe. Go to quince.com slash how long for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns, even on a nice holiday now available in Canada. That is Q-U-I-N-C-E dot com slash how long. That'll get you free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince punto com slash how long. Oh, this is huge for me personally. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by TaskRabbit. Oh, baby, let me tell you something. This is not a joke. I use TaskRabbit a lot.

Because I can't do anything. You need some art hung? Task rabbit. You need a fucking something put together? A cabinet? Got to reach that cheese grater on the top shelf? Task rabbit. Anything you need, task rabbit can take care of it for you. And, I mean, it... How it works, TaskRabbit connects you with skilled taskers in your area. They can help you move. They can assemble furniture, repairs, yard work, mounting, and more. You can search for a tasker based on cost, skill set, availability, and past client reviews so you know exactly who's showing up and can have confidence that they know what they're doing because taskers have assembled over 3.4 million pieces of furniture, completed 700,000 home repairs. handled 1.5 million moves, and the numbers are just going up, Jason. Yeah, throw a little money at the problem. It's not so expensive. And that job that you really don't want to do is something that another person out in the world is very good at doing and would gladly do it in exchange for a little bit of money. So when life happens, your to-do list grows. Get ahead of it now and get $15 off your first task at TaskRabbit.com or grab the TaskRabbit app using promo code how long taskers book up faster, especially for same day tasks. So book trusted home help today. That is $15 off your first task using promo code how long with the TaskRabbit app or at TaskRabbit.com. There's a lot of Asian gunheads in LA. Interesting. I guess that's just an Asian population thing. There's such a large population. Yeah, a mix. A lot of Asian Republicans in SoCal as well. That's true. By the way, I feel like I'm really alienating your audience right now. I'm trying to pick up listeners for Otherworld on this show. They're probably judging me right now. No, Jack, we have a lot of Republican listeners. Okay. I'm not Republican, by the way. No, I'm kidding. Jack is a smart intellectual friend who probably donates to NPR and all this stuff. He just feels the need to buy a Glock. Is this a Kamala thing? I know she's got a Glock in her hair mask. I heard Kamala had one, and I wanted to support her in every way I could. That's how democratic you are. I went down there with mine. Go ahead, Chris.

Walls camo. I went down there with my Walls camo hat on, and I said, let me get a Glock. Yes, exactly. You know. Okay, final. We can move from the Glock. No, no, no. I'm fine. It's an experience thing, though. Why not? How much does a Glock cost? Because I've only bought guns illegally. So I don't know what the going rate is, what the taxation... What was your legal purchase? We can't talk about that. It was a very, very long time. But we can talk about mine? Well, yours wasn't illegal. That's why we can talk about it. His was more of a trade. Yeah, that's true. So you purchased this gun for how much USD? I think it was like 570 before taxes and everything. Yeah, it came out to be like 750. So you can get a brand new Glock during this Glocktoberfest for under a stack. Yeah, with use code Otherworld. Okay. Follow-up question. Did you get the AppleCare or are you just going to willy-nilly it? Don't crack the screen. No AppleCare on the Glock. Okay, no AppleCare on the Glock. Did you buy any accessories? Maybe like a... I did. I got a light. I got a light. Did you get a holster for your thigh or anything like that? No, I don't think we need all that. Look, I know you don't need it. I don't have big plans for the Glock or anything either. I'm not going to be one of those guys. You're not planning to commit murder, but you could go to the shooting range. By the way, when you do bring this stuff up, guns will come up in conversation with people I know. A lot of my friends are very anti-gun. I'm sure you have some of these friends. Totally understandable. Yeah. I agree. You know, I agree. I think there should be much stricter gun laws, but like, I don't know. There's something funny. Like I've had a couple of people like get sort of mad at the idea of me owning one. And I'm like, well, wait, what's the problem with me having one? I'm like, like, why don't you like them? Why wouldn't you like me having them? They've referenced like mass shootings and stuff. And I'm like, wait, so you think, are you thinking that I'm going to do a mass shooting with this gun? Is that your concern? Look, the reason you don't like them is because of that. And you have a problem with me having it. Are you thinking that I might incidentally do one? You opened yourself up to this, though, by buying the gun. I agree with you. That seems like a far leap for a friend or family member or colleague. But there's certain hysterics that come with gun talk. It's a flag. It's a flag. And also, what you're saying is something that I truly believe.

If I was in a situation where there was a gun and we needed to make sure the gun was being handled in a safe way, I would say you're at the top of the list of responsible guys I know who treat it with respect and all the rules that apply for safety. So that part is good. But the other problem is every guy who has a gun feels that way. So you never really know who to trust because everyone's like, I know how to handle it. I'm the best. And then you pick up the Glock. Are you strapped at all, Jason? I'm not strapped. I think the world would be a much better place if we were not allowed to have guns, but I agree. I have a lot of friends who have guns and I'm still friends with them. I trust that they're going to use it only for, I don't have any friends with guns, Jack. I consider you, I consider you an acquaintance. I don't, I don't kind of do that. I don't do that whole thing. It's just like a drug. It's something that can be used or abused. And when you see people who are like, I want to have a Glock because I don't even like, I don't want people to come in and steal my stuff from my business, my home. uh, kidnap my family, kill my wife, whatever. That part makes sense. It's the people that get a gun and they're like, Oh, I've got plans for you. Those people that get off on shooting guns. I don't have a reason for this. This was honestly an impulse Saturday decision. I was, I worked that day. I had to work early in the morning. It sounds like a peer pressure. Not even. I was just, I was just, uh, thrilled to be outside, not working. My friends texted me. I had been recording early that morning. They're like, we're going to Glocktoberfest. You want to go? I had zero intention of getting a Glock. You want to go? Okay. Met them. All right. So you met them. We went to brunch after. So Glocktoberfest was like a, we're going to go there before brunch. And I ended up buying a Glock. Where did you go to brunch after Glocktoberfest? Sorry for interrupting. We went to Tartine. Wow. Tartine. Wow. This is the duality of man right here. You go to one of LA's, I would say. pretentious and white breakfast places after purchasing a weapon legally. Did you pay for this weapon with credit card or cash? Credit, yeah. You paid for it with a credit card. That's how I know you're not a criminal. No. I mean, well, dude, there's paperwork. You put the Glock on the MX. Little Dirk right now. Okay, hey, don't talk about it. Free Dirk! Free Dirk.

I don't think I would pay for a gun with a credit card. I think I would take cash out of the ATM and make it feel more salacious than it needs to be. You're like wearing sunglasses inside and stuff. 100%. Like, sir. Sir, you're going to need to take those off. Sir, why are you wearing a trench coat? Are you standing on somebody's shoulders? I am known to wear trench coats, too. That's bad for me. Are you standing on your friend's shoulders? So you're hard as a rock right now buying this car. Sir, why are you erect purchasing this weapon? All right, Jack, let's get into some current events going on in our world. What do you think about Puerto Rican jokes being made by Tony Henchcliffe at the Republican convention? Have you seen this? I have nothing but respect for the Puerto Rican people. I did see that, though. What do you think? You guys go first. I'm scared. I've been off. You guys, I haven't had takes in like two years. I just don't think it's... Don't be a pussy. I know. It wasn't funny. It wasn't funny. I'm literally writing about this for my GQ column this week, but I'm like, none of these guys are funny anymore because they want to make a political statement. And Chappelle is the same way. Chris Rock only talks about getting slapped now. None of these guys are fucking funny. And this was... I mean, obviously, this guy was pandering to the crowd, but like... The fact that Trump, they've come out and denounced it. He took it too far. Abandoned his boy? Yeah, because it's only because of the backlash. I'm sure they wouldn't have said anything if people didn't care, but it just wasn't particularly funny. He would be pandering to the crowd at a Republican convention in a different part of the world that wasn't New York City, home famously of a large population of Puerto Rican people, right? Yeah. Yeah. I have no idea what's going to happen. Do you see Jon Stewart talking about how he actually thinks that he's a funny guy? Really? Yeah. Yeah. Jon Stewart's lib ass is so cooked, man. Everything's cooked right now, dude. But that's some shit. That's some like dumb. That feels like some dumb comedian. Like I stand with him because we should be allowed to joke about whatever we want. That's what it means to be a comedian. It's like Jon Stewart. You haven't been funny in 30 years.

Like you're not a comedian. You're a political reporter. Everything. I mean. Don't come for John. I have no idea what's going to happen in. I can't believe it's Monday. But. You mean the presidential election? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But the shift that's taken place with like how Twitter has evolved. I feel like it's. They've like forced it to be artificially right wing. In so many places where I. Yeah. I truly don't know what's going to happen. I thought I knew what was going to happen before, but I do think there's a chance that there might be some overconfidence on the right because of everything getting boosted and the Tony Hinchcliffe's of the world, that type of sentiment being artificially boosted on X. You know what I'm talking about? No, absolutely. Because the guy who owns Twitter is a dark gothic MAGA member who jumps up and down. Elon wore a... black on black MAGA hat that had a new font on it, which I discovered was like a popular Nazi font, like a font that was used. And it's just like, dude, dude, like, I don't, I just don't. Remember like three years ago, everybody thought he was cool. Yeah. That's the thing I think about a lot. Dude, I talk about this all the time. This is why you just never talk. All the time. Like, I feel like that's like the key. You just don't talk. You know who really liked him? All those fucking dorks that like space and think that's where we need to go. And it's like... Yeah. He might have finally lost them. And Hollywood guys who... Well, now everybody wants to return their Tesla. And I'm like, well, you don't care about child labor? It's just crazy to me what people care about and what they don't care about. Like, Elon Musk has been a pickle-headed bozo since day one. Like, he's an idiot. Like, secretly. Always has been. Like, I just never... I was like, I would never buy this guy's car. I don't want to listen to this guy talk. I don't give a fuck about this guy. I never understood the fascination with Elon Musk. I really didn't. I really, really do. That's you, but if you polled America, like, I don't know, how long do you think, Jason? Like six years ago? Yeah, totally. He would be up there with Oprah in terms of universal popularity. Just like, oh yeah, got nothing bad to say about the guy. I don't know much. He has a cool car company and seems to be doing good stuff. Yeah, I was listening to a podcast we had Paul Scheer on a few months ago, a comedian guy, and he said his kid, he has a kid that's like eight or ten years old.

And his kid's favorite person in the world is Elon Musk. Damn. Because like Cybertruck is cool, you know? Got to get rid of that kid, bro. Got to get rid of that kid, sadly. Got to dump him off. I love Cybertruck. That's on Paul. That's on Paul. Bad parenting. But yeah, I mean, there's a lot of people who lost a lot of money on Tesla stock in the last six years because- This just goes back to my whole theory about everyone that is in, you know, that has some sort of absolute power. is not a good person. And I don't know why we continue to assume that they are bad people and then they continually over and over prove to us that they are not. And I don't know when the lesson will be learned. From Vince McMahon to Elon Musk, the list goes on. Yeah, like CEOs of giant profitable companies are not going to be like... good people. That's not how you get to that position. You have to be a monster. You just have to step on necks. That's what it is. You have to be a bad person. Jeff Bezos, the only reason I don't like him is because he ruined Whole Foods. That's my big beef with him. The produce just isn't the same. Am I right, Jason? 1,000% right. He ruined my Whole Foods. He ruined Whole Foods. Now I got to buy my produce at Ralph's because it looks like a fucking... military base every time I look. But there's more Whole Foods. Wouldn't you say there's more Whole Foods locations? Like the availability of it. Yeah, there's more Walmarts. It doesn't mean Walmart got better. That's very true. That's true. No, but I just think all these guys are bad and it takes such extreme displays of badness for people to finally be like, you know what? You're right. Fuck this. Like he has to literally like. promote Nazi propaganda for people to be like, you know what, this is too far. I don't even think we've hit that yet, though. No, we haven't. We haven't. But the real point about all this stuff that keeps being proven true as well is that, like, the only people that, like, the more extreme all these people get, the more their followers like it. That's the thing. It's not, the only person it's offending, like, they could take it as far as they're going to take it. The only people it's going to offend is people on the other side.

The people on that side are on board with it. That's why they're there. Yeah, I mean, dude, not to keep gaming out the election, but if Kamala does win, I feel like Elon will have no choice but to come crawling to bend the knee. I mean, his companies completely depend on government contracts and approvals to fly that many times. Yeah, you're right. I think his fanboys will be... Very upset by this. Well, luckily, at the end of the day, he's got a lot of money, and that's what politicians care about. So I feel like he could find a way to make it work. Oh, no, 100%. His fans will be mad. The fans will be mad. I would say in like five years, every car is going to perfect their electric car. And Tesla is going to lose all of its... That's true. It's also like... Because Tesla still rules as a car company. It's a great car for a great price. Drop him as a CEO, honestly. But just think about this. Think about this. The people... This guy that was made a hero because he owned a car company. That is so fucking crazy. That's not an accomplishment. Well, he kind of implied that he invented it for a long time. He didn't outright say it, but he definitely made it seem like. But I just aim a little higher for my heroes, people who have done good for the world or at least created some sort of good art that brings people together. Created Supreme. Created Whole Foods. Exactly. Exactly. Not guys that are like, bro, this car is sick and you're going to want it. Because I don't think he even cares about the environment. I think he just cares about making money. No, 100%. Jack, what do you think about another equally, if not worse, plague lookalike contests held in public squares now? There's one. Is that a trend now? I thought there was just one. It's starting to become a trend, yes. I think we're at the very beginning of a trend. I don't need to weigh in on this yet. I feel like it doesn't have enough steam, Jason. Oh, it's got steam. And if you're not, if you're a log, bro, the amount of press coverage that the Timothy contest got was like staggering. Like multiple major news outlets sent photographers and writers to cover it. If you have an in-person meetup in New York City, they're going to write about it in the New York Times. I mean, but this reminds me, and I have to give them credit. When throwing fits, Jason did the Jonah Hill day and Jonah Hill showed up.

This reminds me of that where these marketing guys, I saw on LinkedIn, these marketing guys came up with this and started putting posters up everywhere. It's like some pizza slime shit. And then Timothy actually showed up. And then the cops came. What if Timothy planned the whole thing? I was saying this. He's such a little twerp. I don't really get it. I don't understand the... I've never seen him in a movie except for Call Me By Your Name. Pause. Is he that good? Is he that good? Bro, you haven't seen the Dune movies? I would never see that dork shit. Are you crazy? What? Bro, Dune is for fucking shit. Are you kidding me? No. No way. Jason, no way. I only watch Dune on the airplane. It's not really for me. Jack, I've talked to women before. I'm not going to watch Dune. That's crazy. Bro, you are wrong on this one. You are very wrong on this one. Jack, trying to sell us, especially Chris, on science fiction is not going to. Don't even try it. Do you watch movies? I've watched more movies in the last six months than I have in my entire life for some reason, but anything sci-fi is truly like I will shrivel up and die. It's just too nerdy. It's just too nerdy. I mean, you know that you're interviewing the host of a paranormal podcast right now. Yeah, and I'm happy for your success. I'm happy for your success because we're friends, but that doesn't mean I need to get into the subject matter. It's hard for Chris to sink his teeth into a plot line that really kind of hinges whether or not the worms are going to eat us. You know what I mean? He needs something a little more based in reality. I like regular stuff to happen. Just normal kind of slice of life is the kind of entertainment I'm looking for. Like a movie about like... going to some sort of collab between a tote bag company no like no more like a more more like a bespoke liqueur no like like kind of Like a before sunset or something. You know what I mean? Okay. The films of Woody Allen. Just literally a movie about a guy walking around a big city. That's a good movie because it requires skill. It doesn't require a bunch of special effects and makeup and weird prosthetic heads on Austin Butler. They made Austin Butler look like me. They fucked up on that. They fucked up. How are they going to make that? It's a scary song.

They make one of the best-looking guys alive look like me. They fucked up. I'm surprised. Jason, have you seen the Dune movies? I don't need to, like, die on this hill, but have you seen the new ones? Yeah, I've seen them. I've seen both of them only on the airplane. That's crazy. That is crazy. Carolyn, my wife, really liked the first one, the second one, whatever. I mean, I watched it kind of in and out. It was not really captivating to me. Well, yeah, because you saw it in a plane, bro. Yeah, I mean, that's going to be the place. Where I have the most captive attention. There are things that I don't like where I see it and I can still recognize it's good. Where it's like, okay. I can too. I'm not into this, but I could appreciate this is the best version of this. The new Tyler, the Creator album. The new Tyler, the Creator album. Dune is working a movie theater better than any other movie this year. In terms of using a movie theater, the speakers. Oh, okay. So you want to talk about 4DX and the sound design? Once again, wrong audience. Just like an IMAX movie. Like seeing Dune, it's good. How much weed do you smoke, bro? Zero. That's crazy. You don't need to be high to enjoy a movie. I watched Dune 2 and, you know, it's a three-hour movie. 47 of those minutes are people getting on and off airplanes that just landed on a... It's just like this thing goes... and a drawbridge goes down. Yeah, that's cool. And then Zendaya and 11,000 aliens walk down the stairs and they meet a woman and then they go back. Yeah, this is great. What you're describing is awesome. Anything with aliens- How many times can you see people get off of a spaceship? Anything with aliens, I'm out. I'm out. That ain't for me. Unless they fucking, I'm out. They're fucking. To be clear. Chris and I, we want to watch a movie like Tar. I want to see a woman abuse her family, be shunned by society and forced to orchestrate symphonies in Thailand. I understand that these movies make a lot of money and they appeal to a lot of people because most people in the world want to escape their awful lives for three and a half hours and live in a fantasy land. But this to me is no different than superhero movies. Oh, that's crazy.

But it's just fantastical and not based in reality. I would much rather watch Dune than Marvel Venom or some shit like that. 100%. I'm not exaggerating. I'm not kidding, Jack. I've never seen a superhero movie, not one. That's good. I've never seen one. That's good. I may have seen the original Batman because I was a child and I was forced to by my parents, but I would never choose that on my own. But I just don't. Yeah, it's just not. I also just don't. I don't care about all the work that goes into it. I understand that it's a really insane production. To get that done on that level requires a lot of brilliant people that are very good at their jobs, and I respect that. But my respect for that ends when I have to pay $30 to sit in the movie theater for three hours. Hey, you know what? To each his own. That being said, I just want to go on the record that I'm not a Marvel movie fan. No, I know. Let's separate these two. Let's separate these two. No, I was saying that I equate them, which I think is wrong, but that's where my mind goes. I don't think that's how it is perceived by anyone else but me. It's just that whole category is off limits to me. Movies. No, no. Well, kind of, but mostly movies that are... that are not based in any sort of reality. What's your favorite movie then? Oh, I don't have a favorite movie. I really could care less about movies. I probably couldn't name one either. But you love movies. You're a cinephile. You're a filmmaker. I like movies. I like movies. They're not making them like they used to, bro. Jack, are you one of those people that doesn't have a favorite anything? It's hard to just name one. Yeah. Because I'm that way. I'm personally that way. Yeah. I'm sort of like that. It's hard for me to think of one at all. It's not like I'm overwhelmed by good options. What's your favorite beverage? Coffee? Orange juice? That's easy. Diet Coke. Damn, bro. What are you, a chick? Diet Coke? No, a lot of people drink Diet Coke now, Chris. A lot of Republican guys are doing it. A lot of people consider... I mean, I've been on this for life. Jack, do you consider... I mean, coffee would be number one. Okay. I mean, water does count. Water and coffee are the only two drinks you need if you're a man, in my opinion. There are people that consider Diet Coke...

To be a nootropic. How do you feel about that, Jack? It is. I agree. Oh, really? I didn't know that. 100%. Have you been drinking Diet Coke for years? If you stack coffee to a certain point, it's going to have diminishing returns. But a Diet Coke, different type of caffeine. I was watching one of the sports documentaries. I can't remember which one. And there was a guy who played professional sports in the 80s or 90s. And he said that he would drink a Coke on the... 100% regular Coke. It would give him more energy than anything else he could do at that time. It would just work, which I never think about Coke like that because we've been conditioned to think it's just so bad for us. There's no benefits. I'll dabble in Diet Coke. I'm not like pounding. I'll do like maybe, you know, it's a treat for me. Mainly water. I have the spindrifts. I got the spindrifts out in the fridge over there. Wait, do you have a garage fridge? Bro, I'm in my office. Chris. You have an office fridge. We're not in a garage. But do you have a refrigerator in your garage, just as a side question? Oh, no, I don't have that, no. I thought you were implying I was in a garage right now. No, no, no, no, no, no. But you have a fridge in your office. You have a personal fridge in the office? Yeah, I have a little fridge. Is it branded Red Bull or Monster? I've tried to get one. I've tried to get one of those. I tried to get a rock star one. I contacted my C4 family, and they didn't get back to me about the custom fridge. I would have loved that. No, I was trying to get it on Craigslist. I've got a brat green smeg in the shopping cart ready to pull the trigger. I haven't had the chance to yet. Love the smegs. Having a college fridge in your office is pretty cool, but what do you keep in there? Some gin? Purely Bev's. Just Bev's. You don't have any deer meat or anything in there. No. Jack, okay, some podcasting questions for you. I was listening to a podcast where you mentioned that you do not think that video is the future of podcasting. Dude, I don't. Okay, good. I mean, I agree with you, but I'd like to hear more from you. Well, I mean, I don't do video. The main thing is I don't think it works for the stories that we do. I think with the stories that...

I'm doing on Otherworld, it's best for people to use their imagination and listen to a person. Your imagination is always going to be scarier than showing it or seeing a person describe the thing. I also think an obstacle I have with Otherworld is you're working against people's judgment of a stranger that they're listening to, and watching them just gives more opportunities for somebody to judge them. I just don't think Otherworld works on video. I don't think it works. I think it'd be boring. And also the other thing is like, then you're just at a certain point, you're just making a TV show, you know, at what point does a podcast become a TV show? Yeah. When you're doing all that work, you may as well just shoot a TV show. A good TV show should require more than a video podcast, but I agree with you. Well, like, well, some of them just become talk shows, right? I wonder with something like that, like how different the numbers are video versus audio. Like if it's just so. skewed video like the actual like viewership yeah i mean i think a lot of young people watch like consume content mainly on youtube even if they're not watching the video it's just like minimized while they're gaming or something they got rogan on while they're playing valorant but yeah youtube is the is the biggest podcasting platform you know apple spotify all of them combined well i just think a podcast is just a podcast it's like like a podcast is good for what it is there's a reason it's big you know people want to listen when they're doing their chores when they're driving you know they want to watch a video in a completely different situation that's my thinking yeah we've talked about that actually recently in an interview where you listen to a podcast while you are doing stuff and you are able like you said trust your listeners imagination and ability to create these own visuals in their mind based on how good you are telling a story because the people that listen to podcasts have stuff going on. They're walking, they're running errands, doing chores. And then people who feel the need to watch a podcast might not have as much going on in their life. Or they're at a job where you just put your phone up on the cash register when you work at whatever store or whatever. I'll take it a step further. A lot of the biggest video podcasts that you see, or supposed video podcasts, like the ones that are going viral, I'm pretty sure 80% of those shows

barely exist. They're just like complete setups to go viral on TikTok. That's all it is. Have you noticed that? The presence of the Shure microphone in these videos is like a... No, that's a huge thing. Nobody's listening to these shows. Nobody's listening to these shows. A lot of brands are creating fake podcasts just for visual TikTok clips. Oh, I love seeing those fake ones where it's like... acting like two guys organically brought up some amazon bullshit product you know bro i've been using this powder for like six months and i gotta say my dick is definitely getting bigger literally i've seen this is that a ridge wall that you have there yeah is that a ridge wall hold on bro is that a ridge wall or are you just happy to see me it's true though that really is but i mean are people are people actually that dumb or is it just that's what people are so used to seeing it's just like i feel like it's just the new meta you know yeah Yeah, you're right. Same with ads too, you know, like everything is like all the ads on TV I see now are shot like a TikTok video. Yeah, for sure. No, no, for sure. People are doing TikTok speak. But they're spending millions of dollars to make it look like a TikTok video to air on television. The problem is like, I don't, you know, just because something's happening doesn't mean it's right or that it works. Yeah. And I feel like so much, dude, we saw what happened to Facebook when it pivoted to video. So much. So much negative ripple effects can happen when like one platform just juices their numbers or like artificially gases something. and then everybody follows suit. I mean, there was an era where you could just start a brand of anything, and if you knew how to game the Facebook ads, you could be a millionaire. Yes. And when that changed, I bet when that changed, car dealerships noticed. You know what I'm saying? I think people lost a lot of money, and there was nothing they could do. It was just like an algorithmic shift, and you have no control over it, and your business is just in the toilet now. It's over. It's crazy. I mean, they have all the power. I mean, the video.

thing didn't work either but i don't feel like we learned our lesson on the video thing why are you guys why are you anti-video it just doesn't work with the way we do our show like we do it on zoom we do it wherever we are in the world we do it with people wherever they are in the world for it to look good and be meaningful you have to be in the same room in my opinion for video to work and that's just not that would limit what we do to such an extreme degree it's not worth it yeah there's no reason just just three video screens of a zoom call as your visuals for your podcast at that point just do a fucking audio podcast what's the point but we're gonna do i mean we're gonna figure out because like i think there's a way for us to just put the at least the audio on youtube you know i mean so if people really want to use youtube like you're like you described earlier jack yeah like sure by all means getting a lot of takedown notices for our music right now just to let you know we're not going to be available in russia at all oh god damn it that's one of my favorite which is fine why don't we all just go mr beast mode team up i know i mean that's that's the other thing is just no one does it We've talked about it so much, but no one makes it look good, except Adam Friedland. He's the only one who's done something that looks good. He's just shooting a talk show. Yeah, but I'm saying I agree with you that that's what it is, but that's fine if you do it right. Totally. Whereas if it's you in your garage with a backdrop and a neon sign, you're not doing it right. But also I'm barely in my own show too, which is another thing. Yeah, that's true. It's like, what am I going to do? It would just be me listening, like nodding. Oh, wow. Saying wow over and over? Yeah. That's crazy. That's true. What was that like? We are ripe for video, but the hurdle just doesn't make sense. Respect. Yeah, we would rather wait until we have a way to use video in the right way. But to Adam Phelan's credit, it's one of those things where you watch one of his videos and you're like, oh, this is just what I would do.

get some nice furniture and uh spend a little money on lighting and a camera and you can have it look like this not fucking like you said a neon sign with some uh wayfair furniture or whatever but it kind of goes back to the the old saying you know the punk rock kind of ethos of like hey and i could do that but you didn't exactly so you know he actually went and did it and that's the and that's the thing that most people are are unable to do yeah 100 it looks easy but no one's doing it i also think he spends i think he's i think that costs him a lot of money no it does like i think it is it does it is eating into profits considerably because he knows it's worth it in the long run and i i really appreciate and also no other networks are going to give him a production budget to do that because of the subject matter that they speak on on the show it's not it's not necessarily dear media material. So they kind of have to go their own way. I think that probably feels good to be fully in control, make the money, spend the money. Some pirate shit, brother. Yeah, some pirate shit, brother. I've still never listened to or watched an episode, but I love it in theory. What are you consuming on the day-to-day, Chris? What's your intake? I'm curious. Joe Budden and music. Okay. I mean, I occasionally listen to the... Shane Gillis podcast. Okay. Cause it feels kind of like our podcast, but just different kinds of guys. You know what I mean? Yeah. Different kinds of guys. And then I'll listen to, I'll listen to like puck stuff. I'll listen to Lauren Sherman or I'll listen to Matt Bellany, like the Hollywood stuff, but that's really it. I don't really, I mean, I listen to Charlemagne occasionally just because I hate Andrew Schultz so much that I can't stop. We listened to Tim Dillon when he's not interviewing JD Vance. Just talking about an interaction that he had at Nobu or something. I'll listen to that all day. Yeah, when he talks about going to a steakhouse, there's nobody better. When he talks about politics, there's nobody I want to listen to less. No, Tim is naturally very funny. So funny. But I just don't know why. It's just so interesting to me that all these guys eventually have to talk about politics and they...

I would say 99% of the time are on the wrong side of where they need to be. They're playing the meta. They don't have to do it, but the money is too good. They can't stop. No, they don't have to. The money is too good. But if Jason and I started talking like that right now, we would be rich in six months. Oh, 100%. How many more times can Chris say Cop Mala, you guys? Where is the money? No. No, but I don't understand. Start now. I don't understand. I just don't understand if it's like I don't think these guys even really believe what they're saying. I think it's just like, this is my, I think, I think over time they start to, but I think when they start off, it's a little bit of a bit and then it goes too far, but the money's too good. The Patreon's banging. You can't turn it off. You know, what are you going to do? A hundred percent. Andrew Schultz already has that haircut. He can't go back now. That's what I mean though. It's like, no one can just be like a funny guy. They have to bring this stuff into it and they have to have. bad opinions on it as well like i don't i just don't understand well it's either that or you have to be apolitical i try to be apolitical with what i'm doing now like the washington post feels good yeah we do too i mean we talk about it from time to time but like i i just don't i think that it's for us because we talk about like current events it's too even with my newsletter like i had to start talking about because it's too It's the only thing in the news cycle. It's the only thing anybody's talking about. You know what I mean? Luckily, Jason and I are on the right side of it, at least in our opinions. The right side. No, not that side. The correct side. We're on the correct side, Jack. We're on the correct side. But I think, yeah, it's just a funny thing that's happened with all comedians and podcasters. Well, it's been a slow process and transition, but now it's like X. I mean, have you seen people where they'll... post identical statements where it's like i'll be voting for kamala this year like i'll be voting for trump this year and one will be extremely boosted um like they'll show them have you seen people do that like the side-by-side comparisons like it's it's showing more people the trump posts they're like actively boosting that stuff right now yeah because the guy in charge of boosting that is on stage with trump 100 i mean it's not that much of a surprise i don't know what's going to happen um but

If she does win, if Kamala wins, it might be a little bit of a replay of 2016, but the exact opposite when everybody is shocked being like, wait, what? are you kidding me how could this have happened you know nobody likes him yeah yeah right the platforms are basically deprioritizing anybody with those opinions or they just weren't on there in the first place now it's only those guys yeah yeah i don't have it anymore i don't really i i watch but i don't post i deleted all my tweets oh i post i post daily i love it it's never been better but i think that the i think that the reason i know what you're talking about is because i'm fucking logged on but i think that i mean yeah man i i don't i don't know what's gonna happen either i mean i think that she is I just think it's very hard to understand the other side in this case because it's like they're so extreme and everything's so awful and just every take is worse than the next where there's just no, it's just really bipartisan. There's no common ground. Well, that's why I think that comedians have become such an integral part of the election is they're able to take this information from Trump and Kamala. who are bad at conveying their personalities their thoughts you know they're nobody likes either of them that i know so comedians are able to take that information they're just better at public speaking they're more funny they're more charming they're more persuasive and they have a captive audience of people that are already into them They're just better at talking than politicians. And it used to be kind of the other way around. Politicians used to be really good at talking. Trump is really good at talking, but now he's sort of, there's no more gas in the tank. I just think that, yeah, there's no more gas in the tank. And he's just, it's getting so extreme that it's like, I mean, strictly on like women's issues, Kamala should win. If we just took everything else out of it, she should win because that's the, that's like such a weird hot button issue that Republicans are obsessed with. But I mean. Dude. And mass deportation. Yeah. It's like this shit. Yeah. We watched Jason. I both watched the John Oliver and he got this week and he did a great thing about mass deport. Like I just learned so much, but it's just insane what these guys, what they're doing. It's insane. Yeah. Like it, it really like when you, I'm like, I'm a pretty logical, normal guy. And when I watch this, I'm like, this is wild that people I know, or at least I, I encounter.

like believe this stuff because it doesn't it doesn't make any sense well the really disorienting thing about right now too is that so much of it like the platforms are like based on something that's like not even real right it's like layers of nonsense that people are arguing about look dude they were eating the pets in ohio i i stand by that one that one i believe and you're in you're for it No, that's one of the dumbest. That's one of the wildest, dumbest things. That and like, you know, Venezuelan militias taking over apartment complexes. It's just like, dude. No, yeah. This is not true. It's like not hard to get animals. Like, you know, it's not hard. Like, why would you need to steal somebody's cat? Yeah, it's not. You're right. You ever tasted a wild cat, Jack? Didn't think so. A little different. Yeah, just go on. The premise from the start is flawed. Just go on Craigslist. There's a million people trying to give away kittens. Delicious kittens. That's a great point. If for some reason you want to eat. Delicious kittens are available for adoption all the time everywhere you look in this country. Yeah. All the time. Yeah, I mean, it's going to be an interesting week next week. I don't know. I think if Trump loses, he's got to go away. I think that's it. If he loses, the ripple effect is going to be crazy. Is that why you got a Glock? Because they're going to take it to the streets and start looking for podcasters? I got a Glock just because I was excited to be in the moment hanging out with people, dude. I'm not as social as you guys. You know what? I get jealous of you, Jason. I watch your Instagram stories. I'm like, look at this man out in the world. You too, Chris. I'm like, they're out in the world. They're going to events. I'm over here stuck in my office. You guys are influencing. You're doing influencer stuff. Why are you stuck in your office? Well, that's our job. We podcast more than you do, bro. The podcast episodes take longer to make. They each take like a month to make, Jason. They take like a month to make these. This feels like user error. No exaggeration. You need long. I'll make one of your pods in one day, bro.

Try. I will hire you. I will hire you. Want some extra cash? Please send me your resume. Literally, if you want to edit something, hit me up. But they're complicated stories. I have a call at four. Sorry, guys. But Jack, I appreciate you. Always a pleasure to catch up. I'm about to poach Jason. Yeah, poach me up. We'll discuss fees. We'll discuss fees. The fees go through me, though, so it's going to be a tough negotiation. You can take your 10%. You can take your 10%. No, I give it all to Jason. I just have to really go to the mat for his rights. It's just because I want to help. Chris is like my public defender. I'm a public defender. He's my public defender. I respect that. I'm here representing my client. Because I'm easily taken advantage of, and Chris is kind of like the older brother, and you're the bully in this situation. I show up all disheveled with a shitty briefcase. I'm trying to get my papers in order for Michael. I got a 7-Eleven coffee. It's all stained on his hand. I'm going to jail, dog. If your lawyer looks like this, you're going to jail. Listen to Otherworld wherever you get podcasts. It's available everywhere. Jack, thank you again, as always, and we will hopefully see you soon. Thanks for having me, guys. Thank you. Our pleasure. Talk to you. If you went to rap