005. - Rachel Sennott

All right, this episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Stateside with Kai and Carter, a new podcast from The Guardian. And they are using this podcast to slow down the news and wrestle with the questions that we all have about what's happening in the world. And they do it three times a week. Jason, does that sound familiar to you? We don't really talk about, you know, a lot of international global news items and climates and cultures and sports and things like that. We do talk about fashion and wellness, but for everything else, Kai and Carter are a great place. All right, so who couldn't use more news? Listen wherever you get your podcast. or watch on YouTube. Want to make a podcast? Spotify's got a platform that lets you make one super easily, then distribute it everywhere, and even earn money. We like that. All in one place for totally free. It's called Spotify for Podcasters. And here's how it works. Spotify for podcasters lets you record and edit podcasts right from your cellular telephone or your computer. So no matter what your setup is like, you can start creating today. Then you can distribute your podcast to Spotify and everywhere else, those other places that podcasts are heard. Video podcasts are also available on Spotify. And when you want to take conversations with your fans to the next level, Q&As and polls are the best way to get them talking. With Spotify for podcasters, you can earn money in a variety of ways, including ads and... and podcast subscriptions. And best of all, it's totally free. Zero catch. We've been using it ever since we started How Long Gone. And ever since I discovered Spotify for Podcasters, I feel like having the option of turning off the Q&As and the polls on the user dashboard has really helped boost my creativity and take it to another level. I highly recommend giving it a try. Download the Spotify for Podcasters app or go to www.spotify.com slash podcasters to get started. All right, we're done. We're done with humanity. We're done with our future. What's going on? I mean, maybe all of the above, but I'm feeling pretty positive today. The sun's out. I just had a pour over, which I learned to make in the last three days. Are you getting good at pour over filters?

uh i mean i don't know if i'm getting good at it but the bean is hitting i don't have a i don't have a professional to judge me well i'm glad that you're feeling hopeful because you made coffee hey look bitch i just read that president donald trump is we're back in business as of easter so we're good bro we're fine when is easter april 12 dude just a couple more weeks we're good to go So then we don't have to cancel Coachella after all. Exactly, yeah. That's so awesome. A lot of people are going to have to die, but Coachella could continue. So he's saying that we should get our workforce and our economy back up and rolling, even if it means the death of many people. Because the economy has to go on or else... There'll be no world for us to live in. Exactly. And there's a senator from Texas that said, like, grandparents would be willing to die for the economy to be good for their grandchildren. Which is hot fire. Hot, hot, hot fire. If it were that simple, then that is true. There are probably a lot of olds who would sacrifice their life if it meant. it was you know it was that black and white but it is definitely not unfortunately definitely not no old people are not the only people who will be affected by it uh no they're not no they're not um but you know i try to see the humor in this even though it's not funny but i mean dude these guys are absolutely wilding the fuck out like these these guys are so in over their head it's like It's like science, bro. It's like me. I'm great. I can talk about celebrities all day, but you throw me a math problem and I'm fucked. It's the same thing, dude. This guy can bullshit and be funny on TV all day, but you throw him some science and this motherfucker can't handle it. I mean, I guess the phrase facts don't matter really apply in our current life.

You know, facts don't matter is one of my favorite phrases when talking about, I don't know, this podcast or maybe Twitter. But when we're talking about the president of the United States, that is concerning, to say the very least. Yeah, it's kind of like if a whole country was living paycheck to paycheck and did not have a plan. And then something, you know, then they lost their job. And now they're just like, well. I guess I'm going to be homeless or something. Or ask North Korea for... Yo, you break me off? You got a little something for me, dog? Let me hold a light five right now, Kim Jong. Kim, yo, it's your boy, it's your boy, Trumpito. Can you let me hold a quick five, Billy? I need a quick five, Billy. Just until Thursday, you know what I'm saying? Yo, I swear, man, my man's coming through just until Thursday. I promise, just until Thursday. it's it's just it's wild bro but like the neighbors at this house i can see into their house like from from the bedroom window and these guys are just mainlining mainlining the news in this way that's like right cannot like it's just on the tv cnn or fox probably um but i can't say i you know i can't imagine living like that like i can't watch the stream i mean all of all of our parents and aunts and uncles and older, that's just how life has always been for them. That's true. Whenever you go to your family's house or something and they're watching the news, you're like, oh, what is going on? It's even jarring just to see commercials, let alone just, here's the death and destruction of our world on a 24-hour loop. Uh, well, and apparently like ratings for like evening news, like some of the bigger shows on network are through the roof, like the highest in years. Um, which is interesting because again, that proves my point that TV still matters and that all these fucking cable cutters are wrong. Uh, you know what I mean? Cause like regular, regular ass Americans are watching TV and listen to the damn radio.

That's the reality because that just proves that. There's no reason to watch news on TV if you have the internet. No reason at all. Unless you can't read. Well, I think the reason is do you want to find your news or do you want your news to be delivered for you is kind of the difference. Of course, it does require an extra step. are in line with the way I see the world versus here's what KTLA channel five has to say about what's going on and that it's easier that way. It's interesting. Cause I know you get, you only get your news from Joe Rogan podcast. So I don't know how that factors in to your current outlook on the world, but I feel like it's probably pretty, pretty positive for you overall. Cause I mean, if you get, How many times a week does Joe Rogan put out a three-and-a-half-hour podcast with a doomsday prepper? I mean, the only thing that we are taking a page out of the Rogan book is releasing multiple episodes per week, which is really how you – I mean, it's something. If you have the ability to do that, then why not? Because people will listen to three episodes a week if you make them. Should we talk about our recent press that we garnered from this barely one-week-old program? Yeah, we're basically on the – our podcast came out a week ago yesterday, and we already have Fast Company Press, which is – you know, that's – You know, that's nothing to sneeze at. Investors are checking all my VC. Let me give a big shout out to all my VC heads up in Silicon Valley that are tuning into the pod now from the FastCo shout out. But I want to mention, really, the main thing I would like to mention about that is that the other people mentioned were celebrities. You know what I mean? Yeah, it was us, Kumail.

And Paul F. Tompkins. So Kumail is your favorite new Fitfluencer nerd who is now pivoting. I actually still don't like him. But that one thing was pretty interesting. I mean, his Twitter is so depressingly serious now that I can't really take it. But I know that he thinks he's doing God's work, which I understand. Yeah, you were into the podcast episode with Dax Shepard and Kumail and the guy from Always Sunny where it was three. insecure people talking about how weird it is that they're buff that's literally my life and i unfortunately i don't get paid for i mean the dream for me the reason that i would devote my life to acting is to one day get a movie studio to pay for me to have a trainer and a dietitian and a cook that's the only reason the one time i went that hard uh in la with the trainer for a month, like, going four times a week, it was insane what happened to me. It was insane. Like, I felt crazy. It was so powerful. The difference is that you are able to handle it. Like, all these people are kind of, you know, insecure nerds who are not able to handle their newfound physiques. I mean, the part where his chick is like, I don't like this is so good. She's like, I don't like this. You look crazy. This is too much. If you look like this when I met you, I wouldn't have dated you. Wait, hold on one second. I'm just fixing my microphone. Damn, did the bars make the mic fall? Damn, are you doing Eminem TikToks again? All right, turn my headphones up, Jason. Okay, got it. Turn my headphones up. But that podcast, if you're into fitness at all or want to be into fitness, which during this time you probably should be so you don't get fat, I would recommend listening to the – I've never listened to another Dax Shepard podcast. I probably never will. But the episode with Rob and Kumail is really interesting and also just kind of tells you how that shit really works for, like, how you – I mean, you know my feelings on Marvel movies. The most interesting part about Marvel movies is how buff the celebrities get for them.

My theory after listening to that is all these people, I guess Kumail is the prime example of buff. Nerds should never get buff because they don't know how to handle it. They don't know. They're too self-deprecating and they're too, I guess, they're not equipped to be able to handle this hunky, hot frame. It's like buying... like buying a Ferrari and complaining about the payments every month. It's like, then if this is really so weird and bad for you, then, then just don't do it. But I don't, I don't like it when, when hot buff dudes are like, like, by the way, this isn't cool at all. Like, trust me, like my life is hell. Like, I really don't want to be buff. It's just like. nobody wants to hear that shit it's like me complaining about being tall to a bunch of short people like yeah it's hard for me to fit onto airplanes and they're like yeah i don't give a shit bro yeah bro can't relate i got no sympathy for you i don't i don't have any sympathy for anybody right now that's the fucking truth this is the end time bitch i'll walk over y'all knock you down to the last roll of toilet paper at the point um So we have a guest we're going to call, a comedian and actress, Rachel Sennett, who is very funny. Hopefully she's funny. We'll see when we get her on the fucking podcast. She can hang with the big dog. She's very funny on Twitter. She's very funny. She had a movie that was... It's supposed to premiere at South by Southwest. We'll get the story on that. But she's also developing something for Comedy Central, et cetera, et cetera. So let's bang her line, get her on the phone, and we'll get the full story. Can't wait. All right. All right. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Quince. Jason, the temps are warming up. It's getting hot out there. Summer always changes how I get dressed. I need pieces that feel lighter, more breathable.

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handled 1.5 million moves, and the numbers are just going up, Jason. Yeah, throw a little money at the problem. It's not so expensive. And that job that you really don't want to do is something that another person out in the world is very good at doing and would gladly do it in exchange for a little bit of money. So when life happens, your to-do list grows. Get ahead of it now and get $15 off your first task at TaskRabbit.com or grab the TaskRabbit app using promo code how long taskers book up faster, especially for same day tasks. So book trusted home help today. That is $15 off your first task using promo code howlong with the TaskRabbit app or at TaskRabbit.com. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by a new podcast from The Guardian stateside with Kai and Carter. This is covering a lot of our bases, Jason. It's trying to slow down. The news and wrestle with the questions we all have about what's happening in the world. And I know you particularly have quite a lot of questions. A lot of questions, but how often? Because we do this podcast three times a week and that's a sweet spot. How many times do they do? Three times a week. And I have a feeling just based on the platform and these talking points that they're maybe going to be covering different stuff than we do. That's just a guess. The Guardian is not some billionaire owned. They're not afraid to say what they want to say, brother. Yeah, Rupert ain't sniffing around in what journalists Kai Wright and Carter Sherman are up to over there at Stateside. But yeah, listen wherever you get your podcasts. You can watch it on YouTube. It's three times a week. And who couldn't use more news? Especially when it's not from here, let's say. Give it a listen. Give it a listen.

Check, check. What up? Hi. How are you? I'm good. Wait, can I hide my face? I just put like, my face is like wet from lotion. From lotion, from lotion. I just got out of the shower. Chill, chill, chill, chill, chill. So there's a little button. There's like a microphone button and a video camera button. Just hit the video one and it'll mute your camera. I only see them. Oh, that's just the floor. You flipped your screen. I don't. Thank you. I love your parents dining. Thank you. Yeah, I am home. I'm currently, okay, I actually can't. You guys might have to look at my face because all I have is the mute button and effects. I can change. Maybe, yeah. Maybe effects will make you feel better. What phone are you working with? iPhone 6? Oh, wait, I figured it out. I figured it out. Okay, we're good. Hey! What's up? How are you? Thanks for joining us. Yeah, thank you for having me. I'm currently, I am in, not my childhood home because my parents moved, but I am in my parents' house and I'm standing on a chair because our service is so bad that I have to stand on a chair to be able to talk on the phone. Well, thank you. I hope your core is engaged. It is. This will be my first workout of the quarantine. This is a good opportunity. Yeah, so where is this? What part of the country are you in? I'm in Connecticut. It's a very easy place to flee to. I knew you were white, but I didn't know how white. Well, now you know. We're going to be podcasting so much that we might have to switch to a stand-up desk to keep our core going.

I think standing on a chair is going to be a long hour for you, so thank you. Well, what I'm doing right now is I'm kind of, because I like to walk when I'm talking on the phone, so I'm sort of setting up three chairs in a row so I can kind of walk back and forth across them. So you're doing a frog-like, like you're hopping around from stone to stone. Absolutely. The other option was the only other place in the house where you have service is my dad's home office. And I tried to kick him out, but apparently he has a job. So I could not do that. I was like, I have to do a podcast in here. He was like, I have to do a job. Many would say this is a job, but, you know, whatever. Nobody on this call would say that, but some people would say that. That sounds like the conversations I've been having with my girlfriend the last week. Yeah. I have to do a podcast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I have to do my job. Great. Hey, babe, can you, like, turn the yoga mat down? I'm in here trying to podcast. Are you quarantining together? Do you live together already? We live together. Chris is currently quarantined with Bae. I thought you meant do me and Jason live together and are we quarantined together? Unfortunately, the answer is no. That would be so fun because then you could just podcast all the time. There would be no setup. You're just ready to go. That's the dream. One day. When did you go? When did you, when did you go to Connecticut? How long have you been sequestered? I was sequestered in New York for like a week. And then my, I, what day is it? Monday? Tuesday. Today's Tuesday. March the 24th. I think I came, like, Friday or something. It was really pathetic. My dad came and picked me up, and I was, like, crying. And I was like, if I leave, like, what's going to happen to my acting career? He was like, people are dying, and you have to get in the car. And I was like, okay. How is your acting career going in the last week? Well, it was going great. Well, now I guess I'm just kind of acting for my family, which that's also a job.

I have had a lot of time to make little videos to kind of go live a bunch of times. So I'm definitely feeling creative. Have you been putting yourself on tape for important agents and managers in Hollywood? I had to do one. self-tape like a week ago and i was like no one will ever see this like i i just envision it like that somewhere like a laptop is like lighting up with emails from me to like a completely empty office and i'm like okay that's the casting office that i'm sending it to can i ask you can i ask you a question now when you did this self-tape because because we had we had uh i think you're friends with harry neck but we had her on the show yeah we were we were texting the other day we were Okay. Her mom was running lines with her. So who did you run lines with? Well, I had to FaceTime my sister and then she was reading the lines off of FaceTime. And there was like this weird lag where I would be like saying the line and then there would be like a pause. And then from like clearly a FaceTime on a laptop, like. uh on the bed she would be like well what about joey like it just it's really it's it doesn't it's so jarring it's really disturbing i should honestly post it as like performance art that's that's an interesting pivot i think during this time i think we need more art you know i think that's what's what comes from this beautiful art yeah totally well what I read that you, were you supposed to have a premiere at the canceled Southwest Southwest? Yeah. I was in a film, Shiva Baby, that my friend Emma Seligman wrote and directed. What's it called? And we were going to premiere there. Shiva Baby? Shiva Baby. It's about this girl who runs into her sugar daddy at a Shiva. Wow, I'm in. I thought it was a Ramones song at first. But this is cooler.

um yeah but they're still what's they're working on uh like I think their people are still gonna see it and do that whole thing I think there's just like there's just like the adjustment of this week of like The thing is, because I don't know how long this is going to be, and actually, I feel like I'm not the only one who doesn't know anything. I'm the only one who's confused. I feel like it's hard to tell if it's the type of thing where it's like, just wait it out, chill, watch the movies. Or if it's like, this is life now. Find a new way to adjust. You won't kiss anyone for a year. That type of thing. People are like, how am I going to pay rent? How am I going to feed my family? And you are like, how is kissing going to happen? How am I going to kiss on the mouth? Exactly. I think that's a top concern for a lot of people, if I'm being honest. Well, that sort of is a little bit what you were talking about before of are we staying with our partners or are we solo? What do you think is a better situation to be in? Would you rather be alone or would you rather be cooped up in an NYC apartment with not much room with your partner? Honestly, I think it's a lose-lose. This whole quarantine, this whole coronavirus is a lose-lose, I guess. Yeah, I really... There's no winning because the thing is, it's like... Here's the thing. If you're a couple and you're quarantined together, I think you come out of here either like with a baby engaged or it's like you never see each other ever again. It's a make or break situation. It's a make or break. I do think it's nice to have someone there, but like the second there's that turning point, it's like, oh no.

Um, and I've just like not even in quarantine before I've been like hanging out with guys and then you're like inside a place with them for like too long. And as soon as you're like, I want them to leave. It's like, it's like, it's overwhelming. You're like, go, go. Do you know what I mean? And you probably missed that. I have no idea what you're talking about. Okay. Chris leaves very quickly. Don't worry. Oh, that's great. He will not linger. But on the other side, I feel like it's tough. Although you can do kind of like quarantine dating. I've been FaceTiming people and I've never texted. I don't usually text guys that much, but I've been texting a lot. Because it's like... We have a lot of free time. So are you saying that you've been on a Zoom date or just like a regular FaceTime? Just like a regular FaceTime. Yeah, Zoom is not very romantic. Zoom kind of takes the sexiness out of it for me. Yeah. With someone you've never met before? One, I would say both. I'm dating 11 guys. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Are you guys watching movies together? I think that's a common thing. I would say, first of all, I just want to say my whole family is listening to me record this and just my voice. All of them. I'm shouting. Pretty good. Pretty sick for us. That's an audience right there. Make sure they give us five stars, please. Totally. Like and subscribe, please, on Apple Podcasts. Absolutely. I will make sure they do. I feel like I've either just been kind of like calling and being like a random, like a 2-15 call and you're just kind of like, hey, like that. Or it's like you plan it and you're like, we should cook dinner at the same time or eat dinner at the same time.

And like have a glass of wine. I think that stuff is really cute. I think that stuff is really cute. And it's a, it's a good way to pass the time. Yeah, totally. As long as they're not ugly or something, you know? Yeah. Yeah. Well, okay. Are you, are you spending a lot of time? Like is the extreme amount of time with your parents jarring to you or are you doing that? I feel like it's making me regress into a 19-year-old or a high schooler. I feel so much like I'm like... I feel like as if I graduated high school and then just stayed and didn't get a job. I just feel like I'm in some weird limbo. But so far we haven't been fighting that much, but... I could see us fighting in like a day. If that makes sense. Do you have any? I could see that for you too. Do you have brothers and sisters at home? Or is it just you and your parents? No, there's five kids in my family. So everyone but one is home. So there's four kids. Yeah, yes. What the fuck? Do you guys like each other? We do. I think we used to fight more, but now we get along. And I think in this, we just like have to try to like, I feel like it's way easier to be like friends and hang out than it would be to be like, we're going to fight every day. But who knows me? I would agree with that as well. Yeah. We've got a lot of time. We don't know how long this could last. So what, what, what is, what's the. Age, what's the breakdown of the siblings for us, please? Okay, I actually, I think I, okay, I have to remember everyone's age. My older sister, who is a teacher in Ohio, she's still there and she's like teaching online. She's like 25. I'm looking at my mom. She's not saying anything. Then my brother is home from college. He's like, are you 22, Bri? She's 21. And then...

Anna is 19 or 20. And then Lizzie is 17. Nothing. This is a real slice of American life. I like it. I'm stunned by this. So you're like not the oldest, but the second oldest? Yeah. Interesting. You're in a house with a teen sister. Yes, and she's doing high school from home, and then my other sister is doing college from home. And what the fuck are you doing? Not much. Being an actress. Okay, I don't have to say that twice. I'm making videos. So, Rachel, if we are going to be in a situation where this is now our life. What are some ways you have thought about making money in this new world? What are some ways that all of us can do that, maybe? Yeah, well, I feel like I was supposed to have a job, but it is delayed right now. Perfect timing. But I've been writing, I have two articles that I wrote that are, I mean, I don't know how many articles the world... needs what I'm writing to right now. So that will help. And then, um, honestly, uh, after that, I think I'm in trouble because all my, like, this is really a good time to start thinking about that because all my, like, stand up tour dates have been canceled. And, um, basically I had jobs, but until this is over, Except for the articles, I can't really do them. So I'll get back to you on ideas. I mean, I think we're all trying to figure that out right now. My hope is that it's like... I mean, I don't know what I'm saying. Obviously, everyone's hope is that it ends soon. But I mean, I don't know. I feel like it'll either have to be... If it's the type of thing where it's long, I do have like...

faith that people will find new ways to do things and make money. Like I feel like a lot of creative people have been doing like different types of live shows online and stuff like that. And I feel like... Are you talking about an OnlyFans account or you mean like regular live shows? I was just talking about like regular live, but I mean that too. But I mean like my friend Catherine did her... weekly comedy show as an instagram live and had a bunch of guests and there was a bunch of people and people are doing stuff like that um so i think maybe like if people find out that this is something where it's gonna last like longer there's gonna be a lot of there's gonna be a lot of patreon memberships yeah i know honestly it literally is a great time to have a podcast how do you how do you feel about patreon I don't have one, but I think it's cool. I think it's a cool way for people, especially people who do visual art or a lot of stuff for free. I feel like there's an expectation to make a bunch of stuff for free, and I feel like it's a nice way to support artists. Do you guys not like it or something? I know Chris is pretty against it, but I feel like that might change after a month. I don't know. oh wait why are you i just call it what's a little panhandling is what i call it but i think that the reality but i think the reality is is that i mean i have a few friends now that are making very good money doing that um yeah i think i just have like a i have like a mental block as like a gen x yeah person and where i'm just like i it's like I want my incoming money to not be a public point of discussion. You can see how much people make on Patreon. It's public information. That seems crazy to me. But I think you can disable that now. I think you can disable it now. Oh, you can? You don't have to show it. I feel like you can also do like... I feel like now it's just moving more in that direction because...

little phlegm sorry um is that like now that's a symptom yeah okay um we find out um i can't wait to listen to this and sound completely deranged um but i feel like there's also like you can do it too if you because i feel like you have to release content like let's say you have a podcast and you're real least like an episode for free every week then you can do like an extra or something so it's not I feel like that's more of like a thing where you're like you're still doing your podcast anyone can listen but then there's like more stuff you know what I mean you're not begging for money you're offering something in exchange for money yeah totally yeah something like that no and I also wonder how the like because I feel like the what we I mean, the TV and film industry, everyone is watching TV and movies right now. It's definitely needed. But it's like, how do you shoot stuff if you're not, except for with the exception of all the little videos you make at home and stuff like that. So I don't know. Maybe animation is going to have an upswing because you can kind of make that remotely, right? Yeah, and then everyone can do their own little VO and stuff. Yeah, okay. PJ, you're a genius. Bro, do you have an agent? No, but if anyone wants to hire me for VO work, holler at me. I'm very close to Burbank. Me too, also about VO. Me also. Also me. I've been told many times that I should get into voiceover work, but unfortunately, I'm too concerned about my singing career to risk my voice in that way. I'm going to wait. He's still holding out to open for Harry Styles at MSG. Oh, my God. I don't even need to open up. I just need a bead of sweat to drop on me. That would be sick. Rachel, what do you think? That would be fucking sick. That would be sick, dude. That would be fucking sick. What have you learned about yourself in the last week? I think I learned...

I honestly think it made me like, I don't know how to say anything without sounding so, I feel like I sounded stupid this whole time. To save space, we all sound stupid, don't worry. You definitely have, you definitely have to worry about it. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Welcome home, sweetie. Thank you, thank you, I feel so safe. No, I feel like I've learned that like. A lot of the stuff that I was like freaking out about or was like, this has to happen like this or this, like it's not as big of a deal. And like, you know, because this is like fucking over everyone. And it makes, I just, it just, I feel like the things that I was like, oh my God, like how will this happen? It's like, it, it really doesn't matter. There's so many other things going on, you know? I do think it's, I think it's. oddly unifying in a way because everyone's in the same shitty boat so it does make things it makes things feel different in that way for sure yeah like it's like every person has a problem from this like it's like and it it just I think like sometimes I feel like I really get into my head where I'm like I'm where you just like think that everything you're doing is important or like all your problems are the biggest problems and it's like clearly no um and everyone is obviously not but you know so that's what I feel like I've That's what I feel like I've learned. And also that like trying to think about the economy, I've never read so many articles in my life. And it's like now that I've tried to start to understand how the economy works, I feel like I opened up a hole in my brain that just like hurts. It is very painful. Do you think that once this all goes away, you will keep that same sympathy? for the problems of the world or you will eventually go back to the same you? Um, I think, okay, deep. Um, I think we're ready for this. Um, these guys didn't even give me a warning. They're going to ask me big questions. Okay. Um, if you can't handle the depths, it's fine. No, I can. Um, I feel like, I feel like I, I hope that I'll keep some of the like, whoa, I think.

everyone will i do think it kind of unifies everybody a little i think so too this is like now i feel like you add to like you know how people are like the things that happen to everyone like a breakup um taxes and now it's like corona also and now it's like everyone in the world can be like we have these three things um it used to just be jewel but well i mean there's gonna Yeah, it was 9-11, Jewel, and now Corona. Remember when Jewel was like our biggest problem to deal with? You're not saying Jewel's a singer. You're saying Jewel's a cigarette. I don't know the cigarette. I like her a lot, actually. She's a great Alaskan, but you don't know the singer? Okay, relax. Oh, my God. That's something else. No, I'm just kidding. You get like literally really angry. You're like, seriously, fuck you. That's fucking bullshit. You both turned on your cameras one last time to flip me off. You're like, then watch this. Look at this. Screw you. No, actually, do you know what? This is a good time is to also watch the movies. Like at night, since I'm not performing anymore, I like watch all the movies that the way you just reacted to me not knowing Jewel. Like whenever I like don't watch a movie and people are like, you haven't seen that? I'm going to watch all of those. And then I'll never embarrass myself on a podcast again. It's a very good time. It's a very good time for that. I agree. I was going to try to do that, and then we watched the Richard Jewell movie instead, so I made myself a little dumber. Oh, is it good? It's not as bad as I thought it would be, but I also lived through the 1996 Olympic Park bombing because I grew up in Atlanta, so it's extra close for me, I think. You know what I mean? Yeah. But I wouldn't recommend it. I'm very brave. Thank you. I'm on the front line at all times. Well, I think that you're going to devour content at a breakneck pace, I think. Because I feel like you're the kind of person who stays up late, don't you? You're a little late night. You're trolling the web late night. Totally. Up there liking tweets, posting tweets. How much sleep are you getting right now? Are you getting 10 hours or more of sleep right now?

I would say, like, ten. Eight to ten. That's good for your immunity, though. Yeah. How many are you guys getting a day? I'm about eight. Yeah, I go to bed at ten, get up at six. So maybe eight, nine, depending on, you know, how good I sleep. Eight, nine. Okay, cool, cool. We're all on the same page. Thank fucking God. Well, something's consistent. But I think people, I think some people are literally like sleeping for 15 hours a day. Like I think people are sleeping like full depression sleep. You know what I'm saying? Which is, I think the worst thing you could do. Well, it's hard because I feel like some, I feel like I feel better now, now that I'm like with my family. But before I was really, really sad and I felt like I was just sleepy during the day. And I slept more then because I was like, you know, do you know what I mean? Like, it's like, if I'm awake, you know what I mean? If I'm awake, I'm like eating. So I'm trying to, or like, you know what I mean? So, well, do you know what I mean? Yeah, of course. Yeah. trust me on this podcast we value sleeping over eating trust me that's a brand totally totally no i feel like i went hard the first week and now i'm trying to like push it back that's the other reason why i'm like i need to know how long this is i'm like can i afford like a week of binge eating and then like three weeks of like eating like broth do you know what i mean like what's i need i need to develop like a But now that I'm home, I'm eating healthier, too. And I made gnocchi once. Gnocchi? Yeah. Wow, you said it right, too. Congratulations. That's harder than making it. Thanks. Actually, not quite. No. I usually don't cook, so it was fun to make. Yeah, it's a great way to pass the time.

Do you find yourself eating wild snacks and shit or like shit you would never eat? Are you behaving? Now that I'm home, I'm behaving because my mom is like healthy. Yeah. What about your alcohol consumption? So again, I am speaking to my whole family here, so I really can't go into detail. But, uh, I would say there the first week I was really, I went to my wine store and the guy was like, Oh, thank God. Like we're closing and I was afraid you weren't going to make it. I was like, I was like, that's a really good sign. Um, so I feel like I was really going in on the white wine. Now I've, I think, I think during core, it's like a glass of wine. That's okay. You need to unwind. But yeah, what about you guys? Not really drinking that much. Chris is sober, but I have been doing a decent amount of THC, I would say. Yeah. You dork. I've been doing a good amount of flour lately. Is that better? Jason, I will hang up this phone. Yeah, no, I feel like it's like you need a little... a thing you know i think you i think you have to you kind of have to earn it you can't just you can't just wake and bake or or wake and chug you kind of have to be like all right i'm gonna i'm gonna do this this this and this and once i finish that i will i will put on my my nighttime clothes no then i will i will feel fine about doing it instead of i'm a piece of shit no a hundred percent the first week i was doing that type of thing where it's like you wake up and you're like days over already like and you go right in versus now i feel like it's like i'm like if you write like this article or like you do an email or something then at the end of the day those are valid things okay it's true i did my email mom can you bring me a glass of sparkling rose please yes

Yeah, that's basically it. You have a core bell that you ring, and then your mom brings you a treat? Although, in my house, I feel like my family is so anti-drinking. I was like, I know that I'm going to have one gossip of wine, and my mom's going to be like, seriously? Even though I'm fully illegal at all. And it was like the first night we all like made dinner and I had like a glass of wine. And then the second night we were, my mom was going at me. We were drinking and my mom was like, we're drinking again? Seriously. And I was like, it's quarantine. What's up with your mom? You said your mom's on a health wave. Like, tell us about it. Is mom like ripped? Is she into eating healthy? Like, what's the vibe? Yoga instructor? Like, what's going on? She's just really healthy. She cooks good, healthy food. She's always making... Like, do you know, like when someone makes like, and now she's smiling. Okay. I got back for the drink thing. She makes like good, like it tastes like it's like bad, but it's like healthy. So we'll just do like healthy stuff. And she's like me where it's like, I can't have like bad food in the house or I eat it. Like my dad bought chips home and my mom and I were like, this can't be in the house. Like you can't buy this during the quarantine because it's like, yeah. If it's there, it's bad. But, yeah. Same, sweetie. Same, sweetie. I'll flush an O&M's down the toilet in a pants. You don't fuck with me. Amazing. I will. Sometimes you might have to take those chips and you put them under the sink and just let the water run and you see the pain wash away. Jesus Christ. Oh, my God. Um, Rachel, I saw that you're doing, you're doing like an interactive drinking game on IG live. What's going on with that? Oh yeah. So my friend Moss and I do like, uh, we usually do a live monthly comedy show called puke fest. And basically the, the way it usually works is that for each comic there. Yeah. Classy name. Um, for each comic, we do like a rule of something that they like talk about a lot or, or we'll talk about in their set or do. And then every time they do it,

the audience drinks. Yes. That's a great idea. Thanks. We started it like back when we first started comedy and now we do it at Union Hall but we used to do it We used to do it in, like, his basement in Crown Heights. He used to, like, live in this apartment with, like, six guys. And we would just, like, do it in the basement. It was completely illegal, but it was really fun. Just, like, no liquor license. We're just, like, serving, whatever. It's over now, so we can't get in trouble. And then the live version we're doing is going to be, like, we just came up with some segments that we're going to talk about back and forth. And then we have drinking rules so that people can play along at home for a fun Friday night. So what are some of your things that would make somebody drink? Okay, for me, let me swipe. Okay, it talks about my birthday party. Okay, I just want to say that I think that after this is over, what we really are going to need on top of that and everything else is the really good birthday party. It's got to cover everyone's birthday who was missed during this, and it's got to be like a blowout. So like a global nationwide birthday party for everyone? Like July 4th? Oh, that's actually a really good creative idea. I wasn't even thinking that. But you were talking about specifically your birthday party. I was kind of saying like, I'll have a birthday party, but it's everyone's birthday. But I kind of like a 4th of July type of thing. Okay. Anytime I say Corona boyfriend, because I feel like any guy you talk to during this is like, that's a Corona boyfriend. We're all Corona boyfriends to each other for talking on the phone. That's a term I keep saying. And then, oh, makes the virus about myself. So those are for me. Okay, so if we were playing during this podcast, I would be blacked out. Yeah, okay, cool, cool. Yes, yeah. See, it's an effective game. A little fireball would be empty.

So you love birthday parties, huh? Just a regular amount. Do you know what it is? Is that I didn't used to love birthday parties because I was not cool in high school and I feel like I was stressed. Every birthday party was scary. And I feel like now I just love all my friends. And so I feel like birthdays are fun. Amazing. This is honestly, this is the kind of uplifting conversation we need right now. I'm smiling. I'm fucking smiling from ear to ear right now. Thank you for that. Of course. I, which is why also this is hard because I do really miss my friends. Like you realize how much you're like, fuck, I like love my friends. And I, and I like, it's like really sad not to like see them and like touch them on the arm. Like, do you know what I mean? It's different FaceTiming them. I mean, to be completely honest with you, I'm holding up pretty well without the fucking idiots that I run with. But I have to talk to Jason every three days. So that's kind of giving me a life, I guess, as the kids would say. But I can take or leave it. I'm not FaceTiming. I ain't FaceTiming with any bros. That's fucking weird. I'm good on that. Oh, I FaceTime with my girls every day. I'm basically on. I'm doing that already. You were FaceTiming before the core, though, right? Yeah, basically, I think I almost every single day I talk to one of my friends on the phone for like at least an hour, which is something that I feel like that is like women own that. Like I remember when I was a child, my mom was always talking the phone to like one of my aunts or her friends for like an hour. And then I was like, why would you do that? And now that I'm an adult, I'm like, oh, because it's literally the only way to get through the day. It's like talk on the phone for an hour and be like. Right now I'm like, I'm doing, you just have to like describe what you're doing to your friend and then you can do it. That's kind of how I get through each day. You just, you just, you just brought back a rush of memories of my mom sitting on like a cordless phone in the kitchen talking to her sister about nothing for an hour. I guess, I guess women, women, women do own that. We do.

We, we, women do be talking on the phone. Um, what I, what I love, what I miss is when you're, um, talking in the phone to your friend while you're in your apartment and then you like leave and you're like, hold on, I'll call you back. And then you talk to them while you walk somewhere and then you do the thing you needed to do. And then you call them back and you realize at the end of the day, you're like, we were on the phone for like six hours today and we just kept like calling back. That's like a good day. The walking around New York after work time, the amount of people they're talking on the phone about in another state is insane to me. Every time a woman changed out of her heels into her running shoes and she's got her Goyard tote and she's just jabbing, just talking on work. I miss the action of that. I miss the groups of that in New York. That's something I'm really missing right now. Yeah, that's the best. God. To chat. Rachel, do you feel like your weekend, like you can't tell the difference between weekends and weekdays? Yes, but I felt that way before. So that's privilege. That's comedian privilege. Yeah. Well, because I feel like I go to a bar, even if I don't drink, I go to a bar every night for comedy. And then I feel like, you know what I mean? I feel like it's already kind of off. That is lost on me. Comedian privilege, you're right. Yeah, I mean, I think that people have to, you have to sort of like plan your weekend out like when Saturday and Sunday are here. You have to like do weekend things instead of just treating every day like it's another day. Yeah. But you guys, but I guess like comedians, like the weekend is, that's the time when you're working the most. Yeah. But it's fun. You know what I mean? Right. If you can call it work, sweetie. And you can't. You're having too good at a time. I guess that's more of a Chris question because he's more of a disciplined worker. What? Every day is the same to me. I guess when you're sober, every day is a weekday, right? Every day is like Sunday is the reality. It's sad and depressing.

Nah, every day is the same. Every day is the same to me. I say it all the time. The only reason that I love not having a job is that I can do stuff on the Tuesday that regular people have to do on a weekend when it's not busy. Like, I'm hitting Uniqlo on a Tuesday afternoon. It's fucking wide open for me. That's the true joy of not having a full-time job. That's the number one thing. Yeah, and then no one's at the Uniqlo, and, like, you kind of browse around. And it's like, if you don't get anything, it's like, no big deal. I can come tomorrow, you know? Exactly. But if you go in there on Saturday, it's the gauntlet. It's like you're fucking, it's like running through, like, a front line of the NFL to get through to the fucking, to the cash. How often do you go to Uniqlo, for God's sakes? More often than you would think. It's my favorite store, and it's got good stuff. So, fuck. Like whatever. How often do you go to Whole Foods, you fucking nerd? I go a lot. I go a fucking lot. See? Look, eating is not nerdy, is it? Clothes are my food. Clothes are my food, okay? I love that. Rachel, I know you don't know Chris as well as I do, but if Chris were to do some type of OnlyFans situation, what service do you think he should be providing to get the check? I think, um, I feel like, like it should be like videos of him. Like not, I don't want to say like not, not reading tweets, but like the similar types of like, uh, cutting edge commentary that we're seeing. I was going to go, I was going to go, didn't you do like a talk sometime? I was going to go to something, but then I was like, I'm done. I've done a few. I'm a long-time panelist. When people run out of other ideas, they call me, and I come through because I'm always available. Whenever a celeb cancels, Chris is there. Well, I feel like I'm that for brown-haired girls when they need people to go to events. They're like, a better actress was sick. She has brown hair. Bring her in. Like that.

Rachel, we've opened up the field here. We've received questions from listeners, and I would like you to help us weigh in on a few, if you don't mind. I would love to do that. Sean Conway asked, what is the daily screen time at now that social distancing is in full effect? I'll start. I didn't think it could get any higher, and it's gone up. Are you comfortable enough to throw a number out? I don't know. How do I see it? You know I don't know how to find shit like this. You just pull down the search thing, and you type in screen time, and it'll take you to it on your settings. Yeah, you can go to settings and then scroll down to screen time. Right now, my daily average is 3 hours and 11 minutes. Wow. Not to flex. All right, Rachel, go ahead. Down 29% from last week. Okay. Rachel, go ahead. Eight hours and seven minutes. I feel like that's normal. I think mine is really low. Well, you just said three or whatever. No, no, no. I think because I've been living with my partner. I try to not be on my phone just dicking around in Instagram. I try to be just doing something. Whereas if I was alone or if I was with my family, I would be on this fucking thing nonstop. Okay, cool. I'm at five and a half hours, down 26% from last week, which I feel like lands in between you two, which makes me feel pretty good. So we're both down. That's interesting. Well, I also want to say that I was... I was using my phone camera to film a video. So that doesn't really count because I wasn't looking at the screen. I was looking into the lens. That's a good point. That's a very good point. We'll cut yours down to six hours. Okay, thank you, thank you. A respectable six hours. We'll still give you the number one trophy, but we'll make it easier to swallow.

I also think our cell phone screen time is going down because our TV and our laptop screen time is going up. Oh, so true. Yeah, you're not on your phone as you walk or you're commuting. You're like, I'm going to wake up and watch a three-hour movie. Exactly. I'm going to look at Twitter on my laptop. Exactly. I've been doing that. It's so fun. It's kind of weird. The words are bigger. That's the only way I use Twitter, really. I don't really use it on my phone that much. I want to say that using Twitter on a laptop feels like you're in an office. Every time I use Twitter on a laptop, it looks like I'm my own seat. I just feel like I'm an intern. You know what I mean? You have an important job to do. Yeah. I'm doing anything to make myself feel younger. So if it makes me feel like an intern to tweet from the computer, I guess I'll continue to do that. Okay, cool. We have another question here from Gabe. Gabe is asking, how do you handle your favorite Instagram influencers promoting their TikTok on the story? Are they getting an instant block, muted, or are you just hitting me on follow? I have been... I've been shit out of people this week. Big mute. Big mute. But not for that. I've been muting people because they're talking about politics too much and I just don't care to hear it from them. Yeah. I think I would not judge, especially right now, if someone's making a TikTok because I really... One of my friends in all the times of the world now is like, I'm like, okay. Um, my, my friend actually texted me like genuine advice. She was like, Hey, like if you get a TikTok, it's like good exercise. And like, I was like, okay, we really like, you know what I mean? It's like people need stuff. So I feel like if anything, I would mute, but I would not block or unfollow. Yeah. I mean, TJ, what are you doing? I don't, I mean, not really.

Not a lot of the people I follow have been TikToking, thankfully. But I have been muting, absolutely. But no one's getting an unfollow in this time. It's just everyone's too fragile. So, I know. Can you imagine how you would feel if you found out someone unfollowed you right now? I think I would literally, like, email him and be like, hey, what's up? I just have a few questions. Or imagine getting a block right now. Oh, my God. You know what I think is going to happen now? I think the nation is going to start unblocking. Damn. Out of feeling guilty and sympathizing. Will someone say that? Okay, cool. We'll see. I hope my blockers are listening. I hope my blocker is listening. Do you have a TikTok, Rachel? I'm just joking about exes. That's safe. You know what I mean? That's, you know. Yeah, that's very safe. Other than that, every now and then, someone that I don't know, like, at all, like, you know how you can check who accounts that have blocked you? If you, like, download an app? Sorry. I've done that before, and sometimes it'll be, like, a completely random person from, like, Minnesota with, like... 115 followers and i'm like oh they're muting me or blocking me because i came up on their feed enough times and they hated my content so much that they were like this is the only way to get rid of her or or they have an interest in you and this is the only way that they will get your attention i definitely think it's the first but that is a positive spin It's a good way to get people to notice you, I guess. Yeah. I know you're like, wait, why did this person do it? Maybe I should get them to fall in love with me instead. Like something like that. Maybe I guess I'll give them, I mean, it's just one drink. Yeah, exactly. Rachel, do you have a TikTok? No, I don't. Should I? No. Yes, definitely. I've been kind of, this has been kind of a Twitter heavy time for me.

Or Instagram, Twitter and Inst. That is your strong suit. I think you should stick with it. But I also, you know, maybe you're a great dancer too. I'm not. So I feel like it would be bad. But I feel like you're a performer though. So maybe TikTok is the medium you could explore. I know you mean sort of like funny dancing. I can't think of anything more horrible. I mean. Me funny dancing. I would be so bad at that. I agree. I agree. All right. Well, Rachel, thank you for joining us. We did it. Thank you guys for having me. This was fun. I just want to say to everyone who's listening that before when I was like, what's going to happen to my acting career? I understand that my life is not important. And I just want everyone, I just want to sound the record to say that. Yeah, don't feel bad. Don't feel bad. That's the whole point of this podcast is to, you know, not really talk about. serious stuff for an hour. Okay. And I loved it. And I've been on the chairs the whole time. Amazing. That's the best part. Tell your mom hello for us. And if she has any healthy recipes, feel free to share them. I'm trying to cut weight during this time. So any help would be great. And Rachel, tell the people, tell the listenership where they can find you online. You guys can follow me on Twitter at Rachel underscore Senate. And you can follow me on Instagram at Trinkly Child, which is T-R-E-A-C-Y-O. Wait, did I spell that right? Trinkly Child. You'll find it. You'll find it. They can find you. They'll find it. Okay. And then your interactive drinking game is on Friday? Yes. It's on Instagram on Friday. Yes, at 9 p.m. Eastern time. Great. Love it. Yeah, thank you. Enjoy Connecticut and we'll talk to you soon. Okay, bye guys. Stay safe. Bye. Bye. Hello? Hey, sorry, Dick. Do you want me to hang up? I don't know. Yeah, we can hang up.

Well, we can say our bye. Our bye-byes right now, too, because we didn't do it when she was on. Okay. You know where to find Chris Black, at DuntoDeath, on Twitter, at DuntoDeathProjects on Instagram. Follow me, at ThemJeans, on all of that. Go check out Fast Company if you want to read a little article about this podcast and some other stuff. And we'll see you guys on Wednesday. And also send in those questions. Send in the questions and also bang the motherfucking subscribe on Apple Podcasts. You know what I'm saying? You guys asked me this shit. Now I want to see... Yeah, the numbers are going up a lot now that we're on Apple. Thank God. Thank God. Jesus Christ. It did feel off-brand. I had to take a shower every time I posted a spot on the fight line. All right. I'll talk to you later. Bye, Chris. I'll talk to you later. Love your work, King.