310. - Chris & Jason

All right, this episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Stateside with Kai and Carter, a new podcast from The Guardian. And they are using this podcast to slow down the news and wrestle with the questions that we all have about what's happening in the world. And they do it three times a week, Jason. Does that sound familiar to you? We don't really talk about, you know, a lot of international global news items and climates and cultures and sports and things like that. We do talk about fashion and wellness, but for everything else, Kai and Carter are a great place. All right, so who couldn't use more news? Listen wherever you get your podcast. or watch on YouTube. Never get a haircut the day before the shoot. That's Hair 101, right? That's just good advice for me, to you, the listener, and to you, my beloved co-host. DJ them jeans. I got a haircut before we went to New York the day before. Got a beard trim. Usually he's good, but I looked and the neckline was asymmetrical. And I expect that out of me. I think that's the indie sleaze effect. It's not? Asymmetrical beard trim? That's fucked up. I'm too old for this shit. You're right. I agree. I'm sorry to hear that. But look, that kind of stuff feels like... There's no way anyone else notices. That's the beauty of that. There's no question that no one else notices, but it fucks me up too. I think you just described in a very elementary level body dysmorphia. I've heard about body dysmorphia before. Other people don't notice it, but you do notice it. That's literally the story of my pathetic life. Nobody thinks we're fat, but we do. Exactly. That's my driving force every day when I wake up. Oh, man. Beautiful day in Glendale. Happy to be here, Jason. It's a little chilly, though, but that's fine. I was just thinking about we were talking about incense. Shout out to my dog, Drew, and his Margin collab with your boy. Yes, yes, yes. Agaric. Agaric fly. Do you know what agaric means? I don't know. No, but this stuff is very good, and I love this guy's packaging. He's killing. Good packaging, good sense. We were supposed to do an incense collab with him,

What is the name of a person whose job it is to create these scents? I mean, I know you have a parfumier. Yeah, I mean, that's basically... This would be the same thing, a parfumier, but for an incense stick... It was too challenging, your idea? I mean, not unlike the vision of Kanye. I have to wait for technology to catch up with what my goals are. So you were trying to get him... And yet again, I have to do it all myself. So you said to this guy... We need a stem player, but incense. And he was like, I don't get it. And he said, yeah, give me a time machine and I can get that done for you. Because the technology is not here yet. I don't think that your milk scent is, first of all, that I wasn't consulted. And if it's a how long gone product, I like the joke, but I also like the idea of people actually using something. It's not a joke. I want incense that just smells like milk, like nice milk. But milk doesn't smell good. It's distinct. That is a subjective opinion because some people enjoy the smell of a sweet, fresh milk. Some people enjoy a lot of stuff, Jason, and I think that a smell of milk, maybe a whiff of milk when you're opening the jug or when you're shaking the milkman's hand at 5 a.m. when he drops off the recyclable glass bottle on the doorstep. That is fine, but I don't think you want 45 minutes of milk smoke in your office. Milk smoke. That's a good idea. There's a name right there. My problem is I don't want... Incense is usually a very powerful scent, and it can overpower the room. I want a scent because if I'm over here and I got this big fat daddy 40-ounce incense stick... So when you're using the Kumba... you know, the Kumba incense chamber on the floor and smoking. The Kumba's putting out too much product. So when you go to Supreme and you leave and your jacket smells like Nag Champa, you're upset. Yeah, I mean, it depends. Obviously, you have the volume of the room. So, like, if you have a big, giant... Don't get into your math bag with me. Don't get into your science bag. I'm saying I have the How Long Gone TJ Studio office is, you know, it's a 12 by 12 room with... It's a cell. Some would look at it as a cell size. With a couple of windows. There are windows, thank God. I have two windows, but I'm just saying, like,

If I get a Kumba incense thingy and put it in here, I'm going to walk open the door and be like... It's going to be like you're at baseline with Wiz Khalifa. Exactly. And that brings me back to the subtlety. When you think of milk, you think of... It's a very plain scent, unless you have a sweet milk, but you would never want a scent to smell sweet. Because then that's the opposite of subtlety. You know, sweet foods and sweet smells like Bath and Body Works or candy, those are like things for the simpleton mind. So we start with milk, then we hit them with the sour gummy worm. I see where you're going with this. No, no, no. I'm just saying, wouldn't it be nice to have an incense where the smell was very light, very subtle, just a calm, sweet... tones of milk and how is that reproduced synthetically with an incense stick we have no idea that's beyond our scope um yeah so if there's any sentiers out there if there's any sentient beings that want to collaborate with me and build my milk scent I'm interested in you exploring this because I now understand your vision a little bit better than previously. I still don't think the world needs it, but I want to see you try. Here's my last one, then we'll move on. All the air fresheners, the pine tree, the tree. Yeah, if you get those, that's the worst thing in the world. That's the worst thing in the world. Black ice, that's you. Black ice, that's bad. That's when you're really, really down bad. You got 15 black ices on the Lexus? It looks good, but it doesn't smell good. It does look good. But the problem, you know, they have all the smells, pine and black ice and raspberry, all that shit. But then they have the one that's just called new car smell. Of course. That's kind of what I'm going for. I want a new room smell where you're like, what is it? I don't know, but it just, it's kind of soft and comforting. Obviously, the new car smell is not soft or comforting. It's probably a brick wall of odor. Well, it's impossible to recreate accurately.

I thought you were going to say Acura. No, no, no, no. Acura doesn't sponsor the podcast. I think that the new car smell, you can't replicate it, and I think that it just smells so synthetic when you try that it's worse. Well, we can't replicate it with today's technology. I understand. But if we never stop innovating, then we'll never get there. We've wanted to bottle and scent the fresh Nike smell. I fucking love innovation. Shit. You know when you open up the Nike box? Oh, when I open the orange box and I see the check and the smell hits. It has a very distinct odor. It's beautiful. And it has for decades. And there's probably a lot of fat streetwear guys who are like, what if we made a coluna? You're never going to get there. There's a new Kith candle coming out that smells like fresh Nike box. It's available at a bodega in Brooklyn where they're selling Kith Cheerios. You can kind of get it all in one place. I had a box of those. They are delicious with a nice cup of milk. That's beautiful. Quickly, speaking on innovation, I did watch The Dropout last night. We watched The Dropout, which is the Elizabeth Holmes, like, the Amanda Seyfried Hulu version. And it's pretty good. Yeah, it is. I couldn't tell if it was Amanda Seyfried or Dakota Fanning. I was like, damn, Dakota look old now. Nah, nah. But then it was confirmed. The music is so good from that era. I was, like, very impressed with the music. Because I said, Shazam that. And before it could tell me, I knew it was Wolf Parade. How do I know Wolf Parade? But then they hit me with the Winehouse. They had the Justin Timberlake in there for the pop shorties. I fell asleep before I finished it. No, they had Wolf Parade. They had your favorite LCD sound system. It was a fun trip. It's just another sign. That, you know, we're old and that the stuff that we did coke to is now cool again. And people in powerful positions are trying to remind us of that. Well, I have never done coke to Wolf Parade. When that song came on, I'm like, the fuck is this music? And then the subtitles would tell me that it was Wolf Parade. I'm like, so this is what Wolf Parade sounds like. Why are you watching an English show with subtitles? Everyone watches TV with subtitles now, bro. Come on. No, I don't. Are you dumb? Yeah.

No, I mean, during COVID, there's been like New York Times articles written about this phenomenon. Yeah, I mean, congratulations to the New York Times article about everything. I mean, all you got to do is start a podcast. I'm just saying it's a phenomenon that you should be aware of already. I'm not aware of things. As a cultural commentator. I'm not aware of things that aren't applicable to me because I have a hard time reading at night. And, you know, I just I want to. Just watch the screen and bliss out. But anyway. Well, it helps you pay attention to something more so when, you know, we're always fighting our screens. There's so many distractions going on. My point is that the Elizabeth Holmes reenactment and your milk incense, the through line there. What is the through line there? Innovation. Yes, yes, yes. And we have to innovate at whatever cost. If that means bilking fat white men out of millions of dollars, so be it. Somebody asked me, because we've been getting a lot of interviews lately, men's health, GQ, the list goes on. I spoke with somebody at a marijuana magazine. Shout out to Gossamer. Oh, Gossamer, yeah. What did they ask you about? Oh, you know, weed. An hour's worth of weed. But, you know, my point is, Elizabeth Holmes, who created Theranos, which is a combination of therapy and diagnosis. You knew that. I did know that, only from watching the program. And she will be interviewed often. People want to see what's going on with the world's first youngest female billionaire. And they're like, what did you want to do when you grew up? And she was like, I'm going to be a billionaire for creating a new thing. I love how non-specific that is. I'm going to be a billionaire for starting something new. Literally, that means nothing. And somebody is like, TJ, what do you want to do? And I said, I want to make incense that smells kind of like milk. And that's what I'm saying. And if you start wearing black turtlenecks... And I'm willing to break the law to get that. And when you start wearing black turtlenecks and red lipstick, I'll know that we're closer to the incense. When she was... Last thing, we'll move on. When she was dancing suggestively to the horny poster of Steve Jobs on the wall, how did that make you feel? Because I was on Chubb. No OVO. I was like, damn.

All the hours put in on the Gateway 2000. I felt like that was actually a window into the kind of pornography that Ben Edgar watches. But I didn't. No, yeah, because all the people out there that we know who are like Steve Jobs is my fucking blank. Steve Jobs is my Lil Uzi or whatever it is. She took it a little too far, I would say. Yeah, but no, I mean, if you're a guy. Or gal, or if you're a person in general who has idolized Steve Jobs because of their beautiful, innovative mind, but then you're like, the downside of taking that path is my penis is going to be as dry as a layered superfood creamer that hasn't been added to a smoothie. Oh, wow. Powder. It'll just be a powdery. But when she gets the phone. But then you see, like, this is kind of a halfway decent bad-looking bitch. And all I had to do was invent a floppy. That's because it's actress Amanda Seyfried who's actually hot playing. Yeah, but 2000, but like 19, whatever. But when she gets the phone, bro, when she gets the phone, she's like, like losing her shit because she got the first iPhone. I fell asleep before that part. That part's great. Because that is definitely, people we know definitely did that. I got the first iPhone before it came out because I DJed something for Apple. And everyone was like, whoa, you got that? And I was like, this thing's fucking stupid. Yeah, I used a BlackBerry. Yeah, because I was still BlackBerry. I was so BlackBerry hive. And then they were like, hey. What was your quote about the BlackBerry the other day? The Pearl. What did you say, though? Because the Pearl is a smaller one. No, no, I know what the phone is. I'm explaining to our listeners that there's the big... I think the listeners know what the phone is as well, but you had a nice quote about it, and I just can't put it together right now. Okay, well, I have to set the stage because our listeners might not know the differences between all of the BlackBerry models the way you might. There's the Big Daddy one, and then there's a BlackBerry Pearl, which is a little bit of the smaller kind of a hybrid between a BlackBerry and a phone, right? The Pearl was almost T9 texting. Yeah, it was the C-Class of BlackBerry. It was the C300, but it did have a rollerball. It did have a rollerball, and that rollerball felt good. But I was saying that BlackBerry Pearl lets these hoes know that you're the type of fella that's on the move. I see, because you don't have – you're moving so quickly.

You can't be bogged down. With the heavy bowls. And I have, you know, because a lot of people have the iPhone 13 Max Pro. Oh, yeah, they love that. All our Uber driver friends have the 13 Max Pro and the Camry. I got kettlebells that weigh less than that fucking thing. That's why I pull up in the iPhone 12 Mini Purple. Let's see how I'm on the go. They say, I don't know what that guy does, but I'm hitching my wagon to his horse. I've hitched my wagon to you and your tiny phone, so I'm happy to be here. Tiny phone dick is some good dick. So speaking of Laird, I'm over here. Speaking of their dry powders, they're so dry. And then you add them to coffee, smoothie, juice, even just water or glass of milk. But right now we're in March mushroom month. Oh, I stay in mushroom month. I know. I do too. It ain't nothing to get the hinoki on the tongue. I don't know if everyone does. So I want to give a shout out to Laird Superfoods. They have functional mushroom botanical blends. Did you add any of that to my coffee? Maybe, maybe not. You would never know. I wondered why my brain was feeling electric. We got the energizing mushroom blend. It's got ginseng, guarana, lion's mane. I knew there was some mane in there. I love when there's mane in there. Lion's mane, Gucci mane. I love when they put lion's hair in my coffee. That sounds good. Not cheap. There's also the stress-free, the stress-less blend. lemon, basil, holy basil, cordyceps, and et cetera. That one is more for a smoothie, less for a coffee. What cordyceps, which muscle is that? Do I need to build it, you're saying? Or are you saying Laird provides it for me? It chops up the cordyceps from really buff guys, and they put it in the powder, and you drink it. Oh, so I'm good now. You know how when I was taking that kratom, and it was sort of a gray area in terms of the legality of it? This is kind of that same thing where, like, Like the FDA hasn't really caught on to the fact that they are. This is in effect cannibalism. Yeah. As they are chopping up. They're on army. And they're just going down to the Venice boardwalk. Gold's gym. Plucking a couple guys out there and saying come with us. I'm not talking about the US army. I'm talking about the hammer. Oh yes. Me too. So Laird is on his army shit. And he is finding these. You know I saw Laird actually. I finally watched 100 foot.

foot wave, and Laird is a great talking head, and the fact that we haven't been invited to build with him is crazy. Well, there's a summit. It was... Obviously postponed for COVID reasons. But there'll be an IRL meet and greet that I'll be invited to, of course, as a Laird Fluencer. Do you think I could join as a plus one? Maybe hit the song with Laird? If I text Laird a video of you doing one of your workouts, then he'll be like, damn, he's good. We'll have to do a thing where you go retrieve something very heavy at the bottom of a swimming pool. I've done it before. I can do it again. If there's a carrot at the end of the stick. Mushrooms, we all don't know what they do. But we all take them. But we know that there's something in there that's good for us. And March is a great time to do that. So go on Laird, use the code GONEVIP, and you get a fucking discount on that shit. That's all it is. Yeah, that's great. I can't wait to add that to my water. Don't add it to your water. Add it to something that can maybe mask those flavors. I mean, you know, because it'll stay on there. And again, I just want to be very clear. Don't snort it. Actually, I don't know. Okay. Bro, it's better to snort it than to add it to water. That makes sense. At the moment, that is the data that we are getting. That's where we settled on. That's what we're going with. Speaking of, yesterday I hit the K. It's been a while. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by a new podcast from The Guardian stateside with Kai and Carter. This is covering a lot of our bases, Jason. It's trying to slow down. The news and wrestle with the questions we all have about what's happening in the world. And I know you particularly have quite a lot of questions. A lot of questions. But how often? Because we do this podcast three times a week and that's a sweet spot. How many times do they do? Three times a week. And I have a feeling just based on the platform and these talking points that they're maybe going to be covering different stuff than we do. That's just a guess. The Guardian is not some billionaire owned. They're not afraid to say what they want to say, brother. Yeah, Rupert ain't sniffing around in what journalists Kai Wright and Carter Sherman are up to over there at Stateside. But yeah, listen wherever you get your podcasts. You can watch it on YouTube. It's three times a week. And who couldn't use more news? Especially when it's not from here, let's say. Give it a listen. Give it a listen. Oh, this is huge for me personally. This episode of How I'm Gone.

It was brought to you by TaskRabbit. Oh, baby, let me tell you something. This is not a joke. I use TaskRabbit a lot because I can't do anything. You need some art hung? TaskRabbit. You need a fucking something put together? A cabinet? Got to reach that cheese grater on the top shelf? TaskRabbit. Anything you need, TaskRabbit can take care of it for you. How it works, TaskRabbit connects you with skilled taskers in your area. They can help you move. They can assemble furniture, repairs, yard work, mounting, and more. You can search for a tasker based on cost, skill set, availability, and past client reviews so you know exactly who's showing up and can have confidence that they know what they're doing because taskers have assembled over 3.4 million pieces of furniture, completed 700,000 home repairs. handled 1.5 million moves, and the numbers are just going up, Jason. Yeah, throw a little money at the problem. It's not so expensive, and that job that you really don't want to do is something that another person out in the world is very good at doing and would gladly do it in exchange for a little bit of money. So when life happens, your to-do list grows. Get ahead of it now and get $15 off your first task at TaskRabbit.com or grab the TaskRabbit app using promo code how long taskers book up faster, especially for same-day tasks. So book trusted home help today. That is $15 off your first task using promo code howlong with the TaskRabbit app or at TaskRabbit.com. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Squarespace. Obviously, Jason, you and I spend a lot of time on the World Wide Web, so do our peers, our listeners, our friends, our colleagues, maybe even your parents if they're freaky. And if you're doing anything in the world, writing, taking pictures. I do topless boxing. You need a website. Exactly, a website that works, that does what it's supposed to do, that allows you to be creative but also business-minded. Jason, there's one place to go for that, Squarespace. Yeah, Chris, I'm over here. I'm modifying calculators and putting Claude inside of them so you could cheat at school. And I just want a place where I could have everything all in one place. I can have the SEO tools.

So those future graduates can find me and, you know, I'm able to accept, quote unquote, donations for my services that might be gray area. You know what I mean? And then email campaigns. Hey, I got a new, you know, 2.3 version upgrade. Boom, boom, boom. Get the analytics going. Raise some money. You know, show your investor all of your cool analytics of what's going on. They're going to want to get in early and we can use Blueprint AI to make your website look as professional. as your competition, if not more. So... Head to squarespace.com slash howlong for a free trial. When you're ready to launch, use offer code howlong to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain. So you hit a little K to clean? Is that... So you're cleaning with a K Kardashian style. I was... Yeah, more on that later. You're Khloe in here. Bae was gone. She was working. She was gone all day. And I was like, I'm home alone. It's Saturday. I ain't got shit to do. Cleaning lady is coming today. I had to do a pre-clean at some point. I needed the motivation. I just did ketamine. How much? I did two bumps at once. I guess one daddy bump. Each nostril? Yeah, each nostril. You like that? Bro, I mean, yeah. I do like it. When I think about snorting things during the day, Even though I know what you're trying to get to a different plane than I would have been trying to get when I snorted things during the day, but it takes me back to a very dark place. Yeah, of course it does. Like Atlanta. Yeah, I mean, doing cocaine in the daytime alone, that's a flag. If you've never done cocaine alone in a Borders bathroom, we ain't the same, chief. Yeah, see, that's problems. I mean, I didn't even know it was a problem. I was too young to even realize it was that bad. It just seemed cool. Yeah. Everyone I know who did Coke at that age, in a bathroom, at a mall, at two, on a Tuesday. It wasn't even a mall. It was in a strip mall. Even worse. A standalone Borders? Well, it's the standalone, the Ponce de Leon location, RIP, next to the original Atlanta, not the original Atlanta Whole Foods, but the best. The room is spinning. It was a standalone Borders. Okay. So you, yeah, I shoplifted from there and did Coke there.

It was a pivotal place for me in my youth. It was a business that you did anything but give money to. Exactly, and they fucked with me. They knew. They knew, and they didn't do shit about it. So you're doing K, and then what do you do? You take the dogs for a walk? No, no, no, that's too much. I couldn't leave the house. I didn't want to have to talk to everyone. How long did it last? It lasts about half an hour, 45. Oh, that's it? Yeah, it's not that fast. Oh, okay, okay, okay. So, yeah, I hit the K, and then I moved the artwork that's behind you. I unscrewed it. Because you got big tasks. Well, I mean, that involves getting a power drill out of the garage. That's true. Standing on something to unscrew it. Oh, you can reach that. Then moving over here, measuring, marking, drilling pilot holes, finding studs. Pilot holes? What the fuck is that? Are they on Epic? Well, you have to. They were signed to Bandcamp, and now their deal is... Unfortunately, Epic Games voided all the deals of the Bandcamp up-and-coming artists? No, I had to find a stud. I had to screw something into the wall. Okay, so you're using your little brain. I was using my little brain. And then the reason or the thing that I really liked, which is like a very Marie Kondo thing... was I'm clearing out this office space because our sauna is finally arriving. Thank God the supply chain issues have lifted and TJ can finally sweat in his home. I blame it on the China virus. So I had to clear enough room out of here. Yeah, and also there's a big old tanker truck full of Porsches that lit on fire and then sunk to the bottom of the ocean. That seems like Putin. And there's been trouble at home because of that. I know. And the Long Beach Port, a place that I frequent a lot at night, of course, to do some deals. It's not been the same. New shady characters roaming around the port if you go there. Daddy's Targo was supposed to be here before Easter, and I don't think it will be now. Hopefully it's here by Easter 2023 at this point. So the sauna's finally going to be here, so I had to do some clearing out.

the the purging of old things yes where it's kind of hard to part with something it's like i never i'm going to need this little dumb thing that i've been saving for the last god knows how many years and that could be a usb cable or like a dj needle or like you know a letter from from a friend or anything like that an old polaroid something like that whereas before i'd have a hard time but when you do ketamine straight to the bin And I don't even remember what I threw away because I was on ketamine. Condo season two is just her on ketamine? I mean, obviously it's a joke, but that process of purging old belongings, people have a real serious hoarding problem with that, so I'm going to combine Hoarders, the TV show, with Kondo, with Ketamine. No, no, no, with just Ketamine. Oh, I see. Hoarders meets Ketamine. And you can't, because Ketamine Therapy now, they give you an IV drip, a comfy chair, they put headphones on, and you listen to some ambient Selected Works, Volume 2. and then you start crying because your mom didn't love you, whatever it is. We need to make it more productive. We need to make it less emotional, more physical. I'm saying the ketamine is cut 60-30 with a 10% question mark. We don't know what we put in there. That's daddy's secret. But 60% ketamine, 30%... layered, functional, energized, not distressed. The 10% is always what they sell at head shops and porn shops as carpet cleaner. That's always what it is, which I don't know what it does, but it does something that simulates uppers. Well, it's much easier for me to throw away old family heirlooms when my asshole muscle has become much more relaxed. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I love relaxing, and I actually... Because I have a lot of VCRs that need to be cleaned. Because I have some legendary drunk drawers in New York that contain countless items of some value, but also not value. I have some old A New York thing stickers, too. No, no, no. I have stuff that is worth hundreds of dollars.

Just because I'm older. I was there. You know what I mean? Like, I do have the Supreme Hermes tray, and I have to hide it in a drawer because it's embarrassing, but it's also probably worth, like, $700. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I just... A very nice young man in Korea will fucking... Exactly. And that's a doubtful man. But I went through my junk drawers as well in New York and threw away a lot of stuff, but I found something that I'd forgotten about, which is a friend of the show, Mikhail Kennedy, had assisted on a shoot in, like, the mid-2000s, like the aughts, And had the test Polaroids of Sienna Miller. And all the looks. And he gave them to me. And I was like, I forgot I had these. These are sick. Like one of one original Polaroids of Sienna Miller. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was sick. Do you keep them in the baseball card Lucite case? They're in sleeves. Because he takes a lot of Polaroids, so he has the sleeves for it. But I found those. I forgot about those. Because you need to protect it from all the Skeet Davidson that you're probably going to be producing on those Polaroids. If you need the Supreme dice set, let me know because I have that as well. The word need is a strong word. It's magnetic, but I know you like CeeLo, not the artist. This is me rattling my dice. I know you like to hit the vape shop in Glendale in the back. I'm about to take a quick 20 off of Unk right now. Speaking of ski days, Balenciaga just had a fashion show that was windy for Ukraine. Jason, I cried. The emotion, the aesthetic beauty, what they bring to the table, no one can touch them. It's cold. That was a cold show. It did look cool as hell. It looked cool, and I think there were models wearing clothes, but I couldn't just make out these silhouettes. There's a picture of Demna in a Ukraine shirt, and he's with Kim Kardashian, who's dressed in a bondage-style dress, like a Hervé Legere-style bodycon dress, but it's...

Made out of Balenciaga caution tape. Well, it's not a dress because it's more of a total pantsuit. Yeah. Like there's no skirt at the bottom. So it's just wrapped around the ankles, arms, the whole entire body. I just don't. I mean. And he's wearing a very innovative hat where he pierced the brim of it. That's his classic. He's been wearing that forever. Right, right, right. I mean, I will never. That is a classic thing that he stole from Dennis Rodman. No one can do it. I mean, as far as the marketing presentation goes, no one can touch these people. The clothes, I'm like, yeah, man, there's clothes? Like you said, I forgot you made clothes. I'm sure there's a very cool neon yellow windbreaker that's made out of latex. $4,700 that Brian Boy will wear is that people are like, this is important. I'm like, is it? Because I guarantee you're going to be talking about something else in 24 to 48 hours because there's real things going on in the world. I think it's cool to do a good fashion show, and I think it is nice to talk about because the concept is good and the whole execution is great. But important? is a little strong. Yeah. Well, there's, I think number one, it's hard to capture what was going on in photographs from our Instagram stories. And I think like, um, other people were there. Um, I think Joe Ellison was there and she was saying like, there was like insane, like epilepsy strobe lights happening and Gabber music playing at my Valentine lights. And I'm like, thank you for painting this picture. Now I understand it. And I would love to be there. And I, I have even more of a crush on Joe after she said Gabber at a My Bloody Valentine volume level. I saw that caption and I thought to myself, Joe's a real head. That's nice. Unpetit noot was what was going on. I think that you, I can't wait until you transition into being like a show music guy. I don't know when those calls are going to start coming, but I feel like they're going to come soon. I want to do a dual 909 set on the floor like the god Jeff Mills.

No, but I mean, look, I can't wait to read all the important reviews about how politically charged and exceptional the clothing was. Well, there's like every person, every brand, every company, every Demna is like, how do I throw a fashion show during the war? But the thing about it is there's no way this happened. Like this has been, they've been planning this for months. There's no way this actually, like they retrofit it. If anyone is talking to the Russian government, it's Balenciaga, but still. They retrofit it for the time, which is smart. And like, I think that obviously he's right. Like there's no question that we all agree with him and the statements he's making are true. I just think that it's like, okay, man, like, you know, I don't know. I prefer this, though, to the thing where people are, like, commenting on Instagram, like, how could you live life right now while this is going on? It's like, what are we supposed to do? Yeah, there's two sides to it of, like, do you produce a show and celebrate, you know, something as trivial as just, like, goggles? Yeah. And then try to make that important, which is a tricky thing. Do you just not do anything at all? Like, hey, we're not going to have the show. We're going to postpone it. You know what you should do? What? Give money, baby. That's what people actually want. That's what will actually help. Posting doesn't help. Talking about it doesn't help. Giving money helps. Actually giving money to people that can make a difference is what actually helps. I don't think anything else really matters. It makes people feel good, and maybe there's an awareness play. I think when there's like a war going on, like everybody's pretty aware. You know what I mean? It's not like this is like a secret. Like you're not getting eyeballs on something that's unheard of. It's a thing that everyone knows. So it's sort of like do we let that control us and do we stop everything we're doing or do we push through and be like, hey, the world has to keep on spinning and we have to keep on doing our work because then.

You know, then Putin has won or these companies are all these big fashion companies are closing their stores in Russia and like not shipping to Russia. And I'm like, guys, cool. Right. Right. Like, I don't you know what I mean? Like, I don't think that's I understand his army are bad. Russia and the people of Russia are not all bad. But it's not I just don't understand this. Like, what is that? Like, again. It's just people trying to do anything. It's crazy. Nike not shipping to Russia is like, yeah, man. I'm sure that's really taken a hit on the bottom line. But I don't know, man. I just don't understand why people can't just... give the money and do the thing instead of all this other shit because it doesn't... I don't think any of that matters compared to, like, cash to help. People want to have a two birds, one stone. I want to be able to do something that is virtuous and do something that is... you know sure that i can like attach my business to and anything yeah anything but take money out of my bank account yeah actually i just think that the i think that the again this goes back to our issue in this country in the world with like expecting brands to do things like their people and it's just like guys this is not their bottom line is only money all anybody cares about is money if you didn't care about anything else you're an idiot yeah we don't yeah the part of like not shipping anything to russia i mean i mean i feel bad for i mean there's so many russian people who are just like good regular normal people that are suffering i don't really don't want any of that to happen i also that will doesn't affect i mean i understand the trickle down like the economy and this i understand like what the thought process is but like if i can't get a louis bag Like, what are we talking about? Like, what are we actually talking about? No, that's true. I mean, the Louis bag is a stretch. No, sure, but, like, that's who's making these announcements. Like, LVMH, it's caring. It's like, and I understand that, like, I get the solidarity part of it and, like, what it means. And if enough people do it, I understand how it works. But I also think, like, does this actually matter? And the answer is, of course not. And also, this is the first time since we are old heads-ish where, like, there's the first time where we've seen,

There's all these articles about this is a social media war and a TikTok war, and that's where everything is happening publicly. The information war, whatever. During when we were kids and we were in a war with Iraq. Great merch from that one, at least. You never read about, hey, we're going to close our Baghdad store. As Baghdad is closed until further notice. No, you're absolutely right. No, you're absolutely right. But I mean, I think that's the thing is that like there was, I don't remember what it was I was listening to or maybe Al told me, but there was like a, there's this whole thing where like some like former like military leader was basically like, well, the other thing is like half the shit that we hear about now is, would have been classified. Like this is like information that these tiny little bombings and this thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like that's information that no one would have had. Yeah. You know, and that's why this feels even extra crazy is because there's a there's information that no one actually needs, but it fuels the fire and like gets people gets people even more, you know, worked up or even engaged, which I guess is positive. No, I mean, we're seeing the downside because originally there were, you know, we were only fed what the news would show us and it was a controlled thing. I know. I only watch Tucker Carlson, so it's a little bit of a skewed view, and I know that, but I'm trying to kind of vary my media diet. They were able to present it to you in a way where you could sleep at night as a good, cold-blooded American. And now there's a 16-year-old on TikTok telling you about what village this guy hit, and that's who I trust. And it's tougher for you to remain complacent when you're seeing stuff like that. No, it's true. And it's hard to control that. But now we're seeing the other side of it when you can see everything, then you can see everything. And then if you don't take a moment to stop looking at everything, you will fully go crazy. But let's talk about Kim Kardashian, something different than that. What about her? So I was looking at her dress made out of packaging tape or her total body suit. And I wonder, I mean, first of all, is that it's not an actual garment. It must be.

like like a skims bodysuit underneath no they probably and then they just wrap her no they yeah they probably put it on her like they probably like put it on her and then cut it off her type shit like you're like you're yeah like a cast yeah it's not i think it was that's the only way it could really be made so it was really making me wonder you know like the the art the the normal trope thing when you see somebody wearing a crazy thing like that is like It must be hard to pee in that. Like, what does she do when Kim has to pee? I know. Oh, my God. Kim has the mental capacity to hold it. Kim also doesn't drink water. She doesn't drink water. But then I was also wondering, that's one thing where, like, how she must pee in that. Like, that could be something that, like, rich, like, NFT pervert guys would maybe pay money to see. Like, how does that look? Balenciaga packaging tape in my pee area and then I just let it go. You know when you have a garden hose and it has like a... Yeah, we could slow-mo that. I got it. Get the ring light, slow-mo. Because I've peed my pants a bunch, you know what I mean? Recently. So what you're saying is you want to create an NFT of Kim peeing in her Balenciaga caution tape dress and then sell that for millions to a Beeple collector. I think you've got it. Not a bad idea. You took my idea. And you threw gas on it. That's what I do, TJ. Because, you know, because we see all of these 3D animators on the Explore page and they've done this amazing thing. I'm glad to know that you think people are going to believe your Explore page is 3D animators. I like that. I like that idea. But it'll be like, you know, a glass pours over and the liquid falls and it lands on this smooth thing and it has like this cool 3D animation thing. And I want to, you know, if I, like I said, I've peed my pants a bunch. Recently. Recently. In the middle parts of my life, the early parts of my life, and the very recent parts of my life. That's why you had to send that Burberry bathing suit back to the real real. That's why I got sent back. That thing had seen better days. They're like, we don't want this. This liner is ruined. They sent me a Polaroid of somebody holding it with barbecue tongs. Six feet away from their body. Putting it in. It has a biohazard sticker on the Ziploc. I'm sorry, Mr. Jeans. We cannot accept this.

I was like, I thought it was because the drawstring fell out. But no, it was the piece. But whenever you see somebody on TV peeing their pants, it's just like the sweatpants that are gray. There's a part that becomes darker near your urethra area. And it's pretty normal. But then it's up to the creative mind of these Pixar 3D animators. Because when every inch is covered tightly with Balenciaga tape. How do we make it work? Where, yeah, what is the most natural way? Is it spring in 12 different directions? You know, like, I want you to really have fun with it. Are you high right now? I'm not. I'm not. But that was a little bit of... Glad to see that's what you... This is a real window into Twisted TJ. But I'm saying that's an NFT that could... actually sell for some money and if anyone wants to partner and collab on me i have the ip this is a ip cookie that i have licked thoroughly i spat upon it yeah i've licked it spat upon it i said this is mine so yes let's move on to a different story that involves a messy cleanup involving a car i've had a tough and a beverage i've had a tough week bro You've had a tough week. Well, look, when my schedule gets thrown off, I make mistakes, and I'm not proud of it. Because you're a routine-oriented guy. Yeah, if I'm not up at 5, 5.30 and in the gym and doing my thing, I get a little discombobulated, as they say. That's when you start punching yourself in the bathroom mirror and say how stupid you are over and over again. Yeah, you're so fucking stupid. But so I'm at Whole Foods. It's 10.30, 11 a.m. Looking for some functional mushrooms. I get my usual berry nutritious. Large. Add almond butter, hemp protein, chia seed. You already know the vibes. Thicker than a snicker. I've got a bag and also a bag full of chameleon cold brew. There's some Khalifa, obviously almond milk. I don't use that, but for the household. And a few other accessories. And I go to the car. Your everyday carry. I'm driving.

For reasons that – this is the real problem as I'm driving the Porsche. I'm driving Al's car. Oh, that's got to be tough. And it's a convertible. And I – you know, classic loading the car vibe. You put the smoothie on the roof. Yeah. And because there's no trunk really, I'm like moving around. I'm putting the groceries in. And I got a bag. The problem with the Porsche. There's so many curved lines. There's so many curves. There's no flat surface to put a smoothie on. Like Jessica Rabbit, this thing has no flat spaces. So I'm trying – I'm putting the groceries in the front seat. It's all – I'm too big for the car. It's the whole thing. And I'm like, you know what? You know what will be better? Even though it's not that nice. Let me just put the – let me put the top back on this bitch. Oh, okay. You know what I mean? Just because that's like how this car – You're feeling claustrophobic. I'm feeling claustrophobic. So I sit down. The car is on. Everything is settled. I sit down. I turn the car on. Start putting the roof back. Roof is back. And I hear a sound. And I'm like, oh, that's weird. And then I go to reach for my smoothie. And I realize that all. that all 32 ounces of the very nutritious has exploded because I crushed it with the roof of the Porsche. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's in like a holding area, like the holding area where the roof goes. It's not in the trunk, thank God. Okay, okay. But there's like a holding. It's in purgatory. It's in purgatory. So I'm like, I literally get out of the car and scream. Like I'm so, I'm losing my shit. I'm like, oh, my fucking God. Like I'm all over the place. That's a scream. I would scream. I'm all over the place. So I get back in the car, and I just hit it a little bit for it to go up halfway so I can see the damage. That seems dangerous. This shit looks like a hot tub, bro. It is just full, like to the brim. It's like it's been raining, and the L.A. River is going to overflow. What color is the smoothie, just to paint the picture? It's a purple. It's a purple from Blueberry. My options were, honestly, I should have just gotten a straw and started sucking. That would have been more efficient than what I did.

So I go back into the Whole Foods. If only you had the Boy Scouts mentality in an emergency like this. I was like, guys, I need – do you guys have like rags or anything? I had a spill. And this woman that works at Whole Foods looked at me like, no. We have napkins. Like, you fucking idiot. I'm like, all right, fuck. So I'm like, get napkins. I'm like, no. Like I'm sopping this. It's like it's a flooded basement. No, 32. You've got the big smoothie. This is a lot of product. I've got smoothie all over my vintage Russell. I got smoothie all over my hands. I got smoothie on the Patagonias. I'm like – I look like I've been at a war with smoothies. It's like paintball smoothie. So then I go in and I buy a three-pack of Whole Foods paper towels because I'm like, this is all I got. I use two full rolls of paper towels because I'm just like scooping out smoothie. So I would have just used the smoothie cup to scoop it out and then – It's two. The area is too tight. There's nooks. There's crannies. There's crevices. Mm-hmm. I would have fashioned something out of some cardboard, but go on. So I basically, the spot next to me, I've basically filled with tattered rags because it's just, it's literally two full rows of toilet. All right. So you're just, there's just shit everywhere. You didn't drag a garbage can over there. Shit everywhere? No, because these guys are looking at me like I'm a criminal at Whole Foods. Yes, yes, yes. So then I have to, then I have to. gather the rags off the ground and walk them back into to throw them away so then i have just i have smoothie on my socks i got smoothie my hair it's a whole thing so then so then i'm losing i'm fucking livid and then and then i'm in the car on the way home and i'm like it smells like smoothie yeah of course and this smell that i loved i can't ruin because it can't be ruined interesting it can't be ruined the smell that you love is the smell of the Inside of this Porsche or the smell of smoothies? Smoothie. A product that arguably smells less than milk. No, no, but I'm just saying, like, I haven't, the smell, the taste, they're all connected. This is a daily driver for me. I need this for my protein. It's my routine. I can't fucking ruin this because I'm an idiot. So you burn the car.

I had to drive the car off a cliff. You locked it, and then you sat on the corner of Santa Monica and Fairfax waiting for the bus line 617 to take you up to Beachwood. Somebody do this. I left the key on top. You guys take care of this. This is the only key we have, and the remote doesn't work, but it's fine. Somebody do this. So then yesterday I went to the car wash, and I'm trying to explain to these guys, like, okay, so. Did you see if there's like a special line? I literally was like, hand wash, hand wash. And I'm like, I tell the guy because they know me there because I go there pretty often. I'm like, look, I fucking did this thing. And these guys like today's going to be a little bit. Yeah, these guys aren't these guys aren't like, you know, they speak English, but I'm talking fast. I'm trying to explain this whole thing. And they're just like, OK, yeah, whatever. And they bring it over. And then they're like, come here. And they, like, need me. They flag you. They need me to adjust the roof so they can clean. Because they're like, I don't understand. Like, I don't know because it's a little weird. So I adjust the roof for them to clean. And these guys have a shop vac out. They're, like, shampooing it. You know what I mean? This whole thing. And the guy's like, basically, what did you do? Like, this guy's like, what the fuck did you do to this car? And I'm like, don't worry about it. It cost me $120. But, baby, it's sparkling. Oh, we're back. It was wise of you to go get it detailed and clean ASAP because the longer it sits, the tougher it's going to be. The heat of Los Angeles setting. Oh, yeah. So it was tough for me. I felt like between that and the pouch getting stolen. So they said, Mr. Chris, what in the flying shit did you get in this car? Yeah, Mr. Chris, did you kill somebody? Between that, though, I'm worried, Jason, because between that and the pouch theft, is the Whole Foods cursed for me? Well, that location is cursed. But that's the only location I can go to. You know what I mean? I'm not going to 3rd Street. That shit is torched. It is a little fucked up, isn't it? Well, Chris, the answer, I mean, you know the answer. The answer is yes, and the answer is I have to power through and change the narrative. No. Well, I mean, yeah, I don't think you have the tools to do that just quite yet. I think what you do have the tools to do, go right over the hill like Whitney and I and hit Whole Foods Burbank.

Right next to your beloved barbershop, commissary coffee, and soon to be LA's first Raisin Cane's. Oh, wow. So you're telling me I can get a 32-ounce smoothie, a 12-pack of chicken fingers, a haircut, all in Studio City? Oh, yeah. And you don't even have to move your car. That's pretty sick. You can just razor from each location. I think I saw you in Burbank. You had three bags on a razor. Are you good? Dude, it was raining yesterday, and I was leaving the dispensary after I re-upped on my eddies. Surprised that I'm not high right now. I am too. It's because we're playing tennis after this. No, no, no. It's because of this podcast. As soon as we're done here, I'll eat an edible before we play tennis. I thought you were high every time we did this. No, no, no, no, no, no. Well, I was, and then I was like, maybe better not to. I could have told you that. As a person who's done everything high in his life for 10 years, I could have told you this. Maybe not. Better to edit high than record high. That's what a lot of my musician friends tell me. So I was leaving the dispensary. I was dapping up all my bros, and then it was pouring rain, and I had to go to Whole Foods to buy some food. It's what you do at Whole Foods. Oh, that's crazy. I usually just get water there, but sure. I was making some stuffed cabbage with the celery root puree for dinner last night. That's fucking gross. Continue. Come on, bro. Celery root is a very, very delicious treat that is also an anti-bloating. I've heard you say this because I think you're in the pockets of big celery, but... Not celery. Celery root. I'm sorry. Celery root is not good, and celery has no flavor. It's water. Mostly celery root is not good, but when TJ freaks it, See, I do a celery puree, add some lemon, but also I do a 50% tater and celery. So it's best of both worlds. Wait, wait, wait. You're adding this? Is it sauce to a tater? Or you're saying that you're mixing? I'm making a mashed potato hybrid indica sativa, 50% CBD potato, 50% THC celery root. Oh, okay. That's different. That sounds...

Okay. A little whole milk, a little butter. I want to talk more about you freaking the Dr. Clark cold ramen because I need that. We'll get into that. Don't worry. I'm sorry. You're a Whole Foods. So because it's raining, I'm like a mile away from the Whole Foods in Glendale and like four miles from the one in Burbank. But I was like, you know what? I'm hitting Burbank because there's a parking structure and I can just go in and out perfectly. Anyways, I had a great time. I just hung out there. Like waiting for the rain to pass? Did you have a beer at the bar? I did everything but have a beer at the bar. Let me get a Stella Artois. Well, I was leaving the gym, so I was kind of energized, and I had the edible, and I was just happy to be in a Whole Foods that was nice, big, indoors, but then, number one, mask is not necessary. Oh, I'm not. Bro, I haven't worn a mask since I got back to L.A. I know. The Whole Foods, though, 75% mask wearers by choice. Whole Foods is 75-25 mask versus no mask. The Whole Foods in Glendale, I hope you're sitting down, that percentage is different. I'm not surprised. You're saying those guys with orange G-Wagons don't wear masks? That's crazy. Well, they never did before. So why would they start now? Great point. If I go to the Ralphs by my house, you are a loser if you're wearing a mask. You said it, not me. But then I went to Equinox, fully mask off, except there's two or three trainers who have the mask on, and it's not because they're trying to be a teacher's pet COVID freak. I think it's because those people chose to not be vaccinated. Oh, I thought it was because they might be ugly. Because that's what I'm uncovering. At the gym, now that no one has a mask, I'm like, oh, you look like that? Shit, body on 10, face on 4. Oh, come on. I'm only talking about the fellas. Like, I see something like, oh. But I had dinner at Hail Mary in Atwater with a friend of the show, Yumi Yayo. I walk in. The whole kitchen staff maskless. Everyone working there, everyone dining there. Atwater is awesome. Atwater. That's a woke.

Atwater – people that live in Atwater would handcuff themselves for jaywalking. So this is – the fact that they're taking off a mask. It's a woke stronghold. So I walked in there. I'm like, damn, there go the neighborhood. And in front of the show, Jake Davis went to McCall's butcher shop another. That was one of the most cucked experiences I've ever been. One in, one out. Yeah, I walked in like, let me get a fucking T-Bone. Hey, let me get a fucking... And they're like, did you order it on our payment toast system last night on our iPad? I'm like, this is a butcher shop. The fuck are you talking about? No, I didn't buy a steak yesterday online. That is actually... That's why I haven't been back. But you said you walked in, no mask. I'm like, okay, okay. I did go to Tsubaki. Tsubaki's good, man. No? I had a good experience. I've only been once. It was fine. Parking's not great. They have valet there. I charge $10, and I park the car myself. That's better than anything. I mean, when you're that deep in Echo Park to even have a meal that's food and not like cigarettes, you know? I like where their head was at, but I like it with a little more stank. I like it. I think it's a pretty solid choice if you live that far east. I agree. It's Japanese drinking food without the fun of drinking. Yeah, I'm not going to drive there, but if I lived over there, I would go. If I could walk there, I'd go and have a $13 can beer and chicken oyster. When Eric Elms opened the power store, we walked over and I was like, oh, this is actually good. I didn't know this was here. It reminded me of going to Handaya in the Japanese mall in Little Tokyo where it's like all that same food. Much lower quality. but everyone is power drinking, playing loud music, and I'm like, this is what I'm supposed to be doing. Everything's a little lower quality. Subaki's a little bit like, we moved here from Bed-Stuy, and our parents are visiting. That's the crowd there. Yes, yes. Or, bro, I mean, or it's like I have two dogs and a kid, and can you move over? And they're all eating here. Yeah. We brought chicken tenders for my kid. He's going to eat at the table with us while we eat Japanese drinking food. And, oh, I'm sorry. Oh, no. Oh, oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pee on your shoe. Dude, one thing on that, and I'll close, but there's a table behind us with that exact same thing. Somebody brought the kid.

And the woman, the kid's mom asked, do you guys have fried chicken? And the woman was like, you're looking at the menu. Like, we don't have fried chicken. And she was like, so you don't have pan fried chicken? And she's like, no, we don't. And then she's like, what about the noodle dish? And he's like, we don't really have that. We have this cold. dipping noodle we have a menu for you to read we don't have other stuff the menu is in english that's why the menu is here is because it tells you what we have but she she was ordering she's like what about noodles like she doesn't know anything about like what this style of food is so she's asking like what a noodle dish let me let me guess let me guess can you describe what she looked like i will not describe what she looked like for racial reasons oh No, she was just an older woman that was maybe set in her ways. Oh, okay. And was like, I don't know what's going on here. She could have been there as like the stepmom of the parent, the kids who just moved in. We got to bring the mom over. Okay, okay. But she was like asking for a noodle dish like you would get, you know, maybe at Panda Express. Oh, okay. Some chow mein with some orange chicken type shit. And the waitress was describing the noodle dish, and I was in the middle of eating it right now, which is like a cold sukiyaki kind of thing where buckwheat soba noodles are on a plate, and then you dip them into a thick duck konsume broth. And she was like, we have this noodle dish. And she was describing it to her, and I was like, this bitch is going to be so upset when her noodle dish arrives. Will you dip noodles? I don't even like doing that. It's fucking annoying. But, like, if you don't know what that is and you got to dip. Rude awakening. Yeah. That's a slap in the face. But, yeah, I'm. Sticker has to pick up stick. I've decided I'm. When I run. I told you this. But I'm running for local office on a platform of no dogs in public. And I think I could gain some support. But it would be quiet like Republicans in L.A. Yeah. We were talking about this. I'm okay with it normally. But as soon as that.

dog rule is abused by a shitty person, that's when I hate it. The fact that people bring their dog to a grocery store in L.A., dogs should not be around food. That's crazy. It's crazy. You made me take my shoes off to walk into your house, but you're going to bring your dog in a basket to fucking Erewhon? It's so twisted. Yeah, I snapped. I was in Orange County eating at this shitty vegan fast food restaurant, and there was some old woman there, and she had her dog in a cart. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And she was just carting the dog around and just sitting next to us. And I'm, like, eating a salad. And I'm, like, looking at this dog who has, like, every kind of leukemia and, like, you know, probably bleeds out of its anus. And I'm, like, this – I don't need to look at this. I don't need to be here. Yeah, the first time it ever happened when the dog rule first kicked in and you could bring service dogs. I remember I was eating at Philippe's in Chinatown. It's, like, an old French dip spot. And they have – sawdust on the floor because it's like an old drinking establishment or whatever and the table sitting next to us had these two giant sheep dogs like lassie dogs and they were just laying and rolling around the sawdust hair and fur going everywhere in my pickled egg and i was like okay this is crossing the line bro i yesterday i was at the when i was at the car wash this dog was just off a leash and like sat down next to me and some guy strolls out and like is it bothering you i'm like Yes, bitch, get your fucking dog. What the fuck are you doing? We're at a car wash. Get your fucking dog out of here. What are people doing? People need animals. No, they don't. That's the thing. You don't need anything except food, water, air, and money. I agree with that. You don't need this. You're preaching to the choir, but I'm saying people are so weak that they just can't not go to... the supermarket to buy toothpaste without bringing like i just don't and it's i mean it's it's the business owner's they got no friends they ain't got no family it's the business owner's fault for allowing it too though like if you say no i i mean what are people going to do well it's it's just like reinforce or it's like enforcing the mask mandate it's like hey guys you can't come in here unless you're vaccinated or you have or you have to wear a mask and no one's going to enforce that so it's just what it is but

The real thing, it should be up to the owner of the business discretion of, like, you walk in, like, some people can bring their dog in because, like, I recognize that you need this, you know, you're blind. So, yes, you can bring your service on the line. The only excuse is blind because all you people bringing dogs on the plane, all that shit, that's fake. That's lying. Everybody's lying. That's obviously vague, but there's a spectrum of the way people do it where it's like, I'm a very respectful dog owner. I know that this is an inconvenience, so I have a very tiny, clean dog that stays in his little bag. I'm going to sit here, and it's not going to bark. It's not going to piss. You're never even going to know it's there. And then you have the other section of people who are ruining it for everyone. So if I own a business and I see some raggedy-ass, nasty bitch come in with a raggedy-ass, nasty dog, and it's just like you're getting into the club at One Oak, it's like, nah, not today. Private party tonight. I don't believe that you need this animal to be in my business to eat my fucking jalapeno poppers. Get to stepping. Bringing a pet where there's food, like, we got to ban that. It's just crazy. I don't care if we're sitting outside. I don't give a shit. It's crazy. Every journey begins with a step, and we need to start at the start. Uncle Pauly, I know you're listening. Set up a door guy or door person. You know what? Or them. Pauly, I'm willing to work at the West Third location one day a week as the dog banner just to kind of get my face out there for my, my school board. That's not a six foot tarp with pictures of dogs. That is a person who bans dogs. Exactly. It's going to be, it's going to be Bergheim on third street. You walk in with that little pug. You think your dog's so fucking cute. Oh, you want a hoagie? It's going to be to go bitch. Cause that dog ain't coming in here. Oh, you can go on our app. You can order a sandwich on the app and we'll let you know. We'll email you when it's ready. We're on door dash and shit. If you want to go back to the car, cause you ain't get, you ain't getting in here with that chihuahua, that chihuahua. And are the,

And also you, the owner, last season. Really? Last season with the loafers? Damn, bro. Not those Jordans. Not today. I'm going to need you to kind of come back with more of a put-together look. Look, you could try again, but it's just going to have to be a different look. And when you do come back, you do have to go to the back of the line. You can't just come back up. Because if I do it for you, you understand I have to do it for everyone. If I do it for you, I got to do it for everybody. All right, Chris. Lovely podcasting with you, Jason. We got more podcasts coming up this week. i don't even know who's on i can't even keep up bro it's just non-stop oh so many and by guys by the way the toronto low ticket alert in the six six six six low ticket alert yeah i mean i know that drake bought a hundred for the squad so that kind of took out a pretty good portion yeah um and i know maddie's got a lot of fans i guess you know so it doesn't leave that many tickets for the how long gone fans yeah so move quickly guys move quickly But we'll be there on May the 13th. We're going to have some other activations, of course, in the city. Yeah, well, things are forming. Things are happening. Who am I DJing? Am I DJing with Sampha? Jason and Sampha are going back-to-back at nude for my real heads out there. They know what I'm talking about. Me and Jock Green back-to-back at the Drake Hotel. Yeah, that's a great idea. But yeah, how long gone? We're back. You can't drink my Skybox. We're back. next week with more podcasts. We appreciate you guys all for listening and we will talk to you soon.